My ASD Child

All folks manipulate others in some way. While this may seem like a character flaw, individuals use manipulation because it works. In fact, moms and dads and educators use manipulation to change behaviors in kids on a daily basis. Manipulative behaviors can be a positive sign that the youngster is learning how to navigate the social world. At the same time, in some cases, manipulation is misunderstood or confused with frustration. Is a youngster with Aspergers or High-Functioning Autism (HFA) screaming because he is in pain, or because he wants to do something? Misunderstanding manipulation and frustrations is easy to do with this disorder. Manipulation is sometimes used by the youngster to get what he wants or needs. Every instance of manipulation leads to an underlying legitimate request by the youngster. Yet, it is important to see that manipulation can also lead to behavior that is aggressive or otherwise extreme. Various forms of manipulation can be seen in Aspergers...

Question What is PDD-NOS, and how is it any different than Autism? Answer Pervasive Developmental Disorder—Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS) is a pervasive developmental disorder (PDD)/autism spectrum disorder (ASD). PDD-NOS is one of five forms of Autism Spectrum Disorders. PDD-NOS is often referred to as atypical autism. Many parents experience a lot of confusion about the diagnosis of autism or PDD-NOS. There is even a lot of confusion among physicians and diagnosticians themselves. Some pediatricians have been known to tell parents that “a diagnosis of PDD-NOS is reserved for children on the spectrum who are curable.” Other pediatricians have told parents that “PDD-NOS is not even on the spectrum!” Many clinicians seem to take a milder diagnosis and simply label it PDD-NOS. Let’s look at Autism first… A. To be diagnosed with autism, you must have: At least SIX (6) of the below symptoms from categories (1), (2) and (3) You must have TWO (2) symp...

From A Woman's Perspective: A young lady who has participated for several years in a social group for adults with high functioning autism and Asperger’s Syndrome sponsored at our TEACCH Center in Asheville, recently remarked, “There aren’t a heck of a lot of ladies who have Asperger’s Syndrome or autism. The majority are males, and although we get along with the guys, there are some issues that they are never going to understand. I wish there was more information specifically for ladies who have autism.” Her comment prompted the initiation of the first ladies’ group at the Asheville TEACCH Center.  While talking with this lady, who is in her 20’s, I was reminded of my own early adulthood. I remember the strong support of “ladies’ consciousness-raising groups” that sprouted up on college campuses and in living rooms in the 60’s and 70’s. While struggling for and demanding equality between the sexes in the society at large, we discovered that there were important distincti...

Question At this moment in time, I feel like my heart is broken. A good friend of ours contacted my husband today and said that last week our son K___, 14, said sexual things and showed dirty pictures. We asked K___ and he said nothing was said or done. When our friend came over with his 10 year old son, we all sat down and K___ just sat there as the 10 year old told how K___ put on a DVD where there were women kissing and two people having sex though they didn’t see anything. Along with the 10 year old was his 7 year old sister. K___ has a human body book and he showed the 7 y/o where the penis goes into the vagina. K___ also asked the 10 y/o if he knew that a man’s penis can go into another’s bum and did he want him to try it out on him. Needless to say, I felt nauseous and in shock. Our son has sex and puberty books, and as a rule, asks if he wants to know anything. I am totally gob smacked. I have read discussions on other websites and I know we are not alone. Other parents...

"Any advice on how to approach our friends and family to tell them about our son's recent diagnosis of high functioning autism ...or would it be better to say nothing?" RE: "...would it be better to say nothing?" It would be good for your friends and family to understand High-Functioning Autism (HFA), otherwise they will come to their own conclusions about your son's behavior, which will undoubtedly be way off base. Aspergers and HFA are often mentioned in the newspapers or on television, but the truth is that, besides remembering Dustin Hoffman's performance in the movie "Rain Man" as an Autistic savant, most people have no clue about what an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is. If you’re an “old pro” at parenting a child with Aspergers or HFA, then you probably have had a lot of explaining to do to family and friends through the years. For those of you who are just now starting this journey, here are some things you can do to ...

What works for your Aspergers (high functioning autistic) child at the age of 3 may not work for him/her at the age of 13. Here are some important tips for parenting children on the spectrum  across the lifespan : Childhood— After your youngster is diagnosed with Aspergers, you may feel unprepared or unable to provide him/her with the necessary care and education. Know that there are many treatment options, social services and programs, and other resources that can help. Some tips that can help you and your Aspergers youngster are: • Contact your local health department or autism advocacy groups to learn about the special programs available in your state and local community. • Keep a record of conversations, meetings with health care providers and educators, and other sources of information. This will help you remember the different treatment options and decide which would help your youngster most. • Keep a record of the doctors' reports and your youngster...

Question My 4-year-old was diagnosed with Aspergers a month ago. I went for a second opinion, and that doctor doesn’t think she has Aspergers – he thinks it is NVLD. So I was reading about them and I understand that they are very similar (except that with AS, they have obsessions). My daughter does not have anything she is obsessed with, but she does need structure and routine throughout the day to regulate herself. My daughter also has Sensory Integration Disorder, which from what I understand can coexist with AS. I don’t know if I should get a 3rd opinion or just keep the Aspergers diagnosis so she can get services in school. The doctor that says he thinks it is NVLD said that Aspergers usually isn’t diagnosed until age 5 or 6, which I don’t think is true. I am just looking for your input. Answer There is often confusion between Aspergers (high functioning autism) and Nonverbal Learning Disabilities (NLD). In fact, sometimes these two terms are mistakenly used interchan...

Eye-to-eye contact is a type of communication. However, there ought to be a shared language involving two individuals when eye-to-eye contact is made. A person should be able to read what the other person is thinking and feeling. That's the way "neurotypical" (i.e., non-Aspergers) eye contact functions. With Aspergers (high functioning autism) however, that's not often the situation. Eye-to-eye contact isn't something that is natural or even desirable to Aspies. They have trouble with the interpretation of this language. Many reasons exist why they can't share the language. First, looking at someone's eye balls is extremely awkward. It is just like looking at the headlights of a train. Eye balls flicker and move, which can be unpleasant for those who have Aspergers. Even if they do make eye contact, they do not know the silent language. They need to learn each thing that the eyes tell them, from very obvious to very subtle. The next issue is ...

Receiving the news that your child has been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is an event that can invoke a whirlwind of emotions for parents—relief from finally having answers, confusion regarding what the diagnosis means, fear about the future, and a glimmer of hope for effective support. Amid these feelings lies an essential task: how to communicate this complex information to your child in a way that is clear, compassionate, and supportive. This guide aims to help you navigate this sensitive conversation with care and empathy. ### Understanding the Complexity of Autism Spectrum Disorder Before initiating the conversation, it is crucial to have a comprehensive understanding of ASD. Autism Spectrum Disorder is not a singular condition but a spectrum of disorders, meaning that symptoms and abilities can vary widely among individuals. For instance, while some children may struggle significantly with social interactions, communication deficits, and repetitive behaviors, othe...

“My teenage son is very aggressive and lacks any type of impulse control. He cannot be left alone with his siblings. Does you have any recommendations? I know he does not want to do these things, because when we talk about it, he says he loves his sister, etc., but he hurts her all the time. My poor daughter has to put up with his aggressions on a daily basis. I can't watch him every second he's awake. I also can't put either child in a protective bubble or send my son to his room and leave him there all day. I really don't know what to do with him and I'm not a big advocate of drug therapy. He's starting to internalize his behavior, and now said to me this morning that he's a bad boy even though no one tells him that, not us, or his teacher. I worry about his self-esteem as he grows older. We praise him when he's good, but he gets a ton of negative feedback: “Don't do this… don't do that, etc… you need to go to your room for hitting your sis...