Helping Aspergers Children Adjust to the School Environment

Many – if not most – Aspergers (high functioning autistic) kids have significant problems adjusting to the school environment. Although some begin to struggle as early as preschool, almost all will encounter some degree of difficulty by the upper elementary school grades. Here is how moms and dads can help:

1. As your youngster's advocate you have a never-ending job! There is always so much to teach and so much to do. Usually, the school year is stressful- not only for the kids with Aspergers, but their moms and dads as well. Remember, you have to make some effort to take care of your own needs, if you plan to have the time and energy to attend to the needs of others.

2. Establish "homework" routines by helping your youngster get into the habit of doing quiet activities at a specific time and place every day. This could be time for reviewing previously mastered skills, doing silent reading, journal writing, crossword puzzles and similar activities before school begins. Do be careful that this is not a time to have your youngster engage in his most preferred activities, as it is designed to set the stage for homework during the school year.

3. Recognize that the week prior to the start of school is an extremely busy time. You may be able to arrange for the team to meet for one hour and arrange for follow-up meetings at the beginning of the school year. The most helpful information will include simple suggestions to assist educators in reducing your youngster's anxiety. Educators do not need to become an "expert" on Aspergers before your youngster walks into their classroom. If a meeting is not going to be possible, prepare a one page synopsis about your youngster for the teacher. This may include:

• Suggestions to reduce anxiety
• Stress Triggers
• Stress Signs
• Strengths and interests and how the teacher can use them to orchestrate successful experiences
• Challenges that may not be obvious

4. If your youngster will be attending a new school, see if it's is possible to visit the school several times over the summer. Perhaps your youngster can be provided with opportunities to become acquainted with some of the staff at school as well. The more familiar the child is with all aspects of the environment, the more comfortable she will be. If your youngster will be returning to the same school, you may not need as extensive an orientation. However, it may still be beneficial to meet her new teacher and to see the classroom. One parent indicated that she purchases the school yearbook to acquaint her youngster with the building, pictures and names of key school personnel, as well as information regarding available extracurricular activities.

5. If your school requires school uniforms, you may need to give your youngster time to get used to wearing the uniform. In some cases, it may be helpful to wash the uniform several times with fabric softener to lessen the "sensory" challenges. Plan to have your youngster wear his uniform for gradually longer periods of time, over the course of several days prior to the start of school. If your school doesn't have uniforms, it is still possible that "appropriate attire" for school may be different than what your youngster chooses to wear during the summer. Have your youngster practice wearing appropriate school attire before the first day of school. If your youngster will be attending a new school and you're not sure what children wear, it's a good idea to ask - so you can help your youngster learn to wear clothing that will be considered "ok" by peers.

6. Make friendly overtures with school personnel to set the stage for a collaborative relationship. When you stop by the school during the summer, consider bringing cookies for all staff working in the front office. Bet yet, when your youngster accompanies you, let your youngster practice the social skill of offering items to others. Remember, in general, school personnel are overworked and under-appreciated! From the very beginning, look for opportunities to show appreciation and support to all school personnel who go out of their way to help your youngster be successful. Some suggestions include:

• donations of useful items for the classroom
• gift certificates to stores
• hosting teacher appreciation lunches or dinners
• letters of support sent to their supervisor
• occasional treats (homemade or bought)
• paid attendance at conference
• volunteering to help with various projects at school

7. Many children with Aspergers have difficulty adjusting to new routines. Therefore, in the weeks prior to the beginning of school it is helpful to gradually move into the schedule that is necessary during the school year. This might mean shifting bed time to the time your youngster will need to go to sleep during the school year. You may also focus on helping your youngster becomes accustomed to waking up earlier in the morning. For many kids, it is important that they also reestablish morning routines. This may reduce some of the "challenging mornings" many moms and dads report in getting their youngster ready for school.

8. Plan on using external motivational systems in order to be able to implement these changes. Children with Aspergers rarely see "our agenda" as necessary or important. This can often involve the use of activities/items we often give away freely (e.g., watching TV shows, playing favorite games, errand to favorite store, points/tokens exchangeable for something your youngster wants). Remember, the key to motivation is that the reinforcer must be powerful and immediate!

9. The development of all positive social relationships will be helpful for your youngster. Prior to the start of school, you will want to try and target one or two kids who will attend school with your youngster: Usually, successful social experiences are easiest to structure with one youngster at a time, rather than a group. Sometimes, moms and dads experience more success if they establish a relationship with the parent of a "tolerant" peer and enlist the support of the parent (and the student) in serving as a "peer buddy".

10. You will want to remain in close contact with school personnel to identify problems early on in the school year. In particular, you will want to monitor supports/problems in all unstructured situations, monitor your youngster's stress signals, monitor for teasing and bullying and communicate frequently about homework assignments.

Student Orientation—

Provide a walk-through of the Aspergers child's daily schedule. In schools where the schedule changes from day to day, the child should have the opportunity to practice all possible schedules. If applicable, student "buddies" should be available to walk through the schedule with the Aspergers child. The following are suggestions for the walk-through:

1. Meet all educators and relevant school personnel.
2. Obtain information about school routines and rules (e.g., lunch, going to the bathroom, before/after school, transportation).
3. Practice route(s) from various classes to the bathroom, counselor's office, home base, etc.
4. Practice routines such as finding homeroom from the bus stop, opening locker, going through the cafeteria line, etc.
5. Practice use of transition to home base through role-play.
6. Provide instruction on the procedure for seeking out the safe person and home base.
7. Provide the child the pictures and names of all additional personnel, such as cafeteria workers, school nurse, etc.
8. Provide the child with pictures and names of all educators in advance of orientation.
9. Provide the child with pictures and names of student "buddies."
10. Provide visual/written class schedule(s) for the child.
11. Show the child where her assigned seat in each classroom will be.
12. Videotape a walk-through school schedule for the child to review at home.   

 

 

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==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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Helping Aspergers and HFA Children Get to Sleep

Nearly 70 percent of Aspergers and High-Functioning Autistic (HFA) children under age 10 experience some type of sleep problem. And although “sleep needs” naturally decrease by about 15 minutes on average every year (1-year-olds require almost 14 hours daily, while a 17-year-old needs at least 8.25 hours), a startling 80 percent of Aspergers and HFA children ages 11 to 17 get less than the recommended amount. Some these kids may have chronic sleep difficulties, and many are actually going through their days sleep-deprived.

Does your child:

• get out of bed over and over until you are both exhausted and your child is crying
• demand that you lie down with her and stay there until she falls asleep
• call to you after you have already read 3 stories, checked for monsters, lined up the stuffed animals, and made sure that the door was ajar in exactly the correct position to your child’s specifications

Do you:

• wake up in your own bed and notice the extra body sleeping peaceful beside you
• try to sneak out of your child’s bedroom, but he wakes up and demands that you return
• find yourself drifting off and waking up two hours later in your child’s bed

If any of this sounds familiar, then you are probably waking up exhausted in the morning, dragging yourself through your day, and dreading this evening when it all starts again.

Help your youngster get better rest by trying out one or more of the following strategies:

1. About fifteen minutes before bedtime, and again five minutes before, remind your youngster that bedtime is coming soon. It's hard for kids to stop doing something they enjoy, and a reminder gives them time to finish what they're doing and to get ready to "switch gears" for actual bedtime routines. Some people find it helpful to use neutral timekeepers like clocks or a timer to help kids see when it’s time for bed.

2. The key to getting a youngster to bed easily is helping them to relax before bed time arrives. Not only is bath time necessary to prepare your youngster for the next day, it also helps by slowing them down into the right frame of mind needed to fall asleep. A warm bath or shower is very comforting and also helps to relax the body, making focusing the youngster on calming down before bed much easier.

3. Bedtime starts long before kids are in bed. In fact, kids are far more ready for bedtime if they have "winding down" time with some calm, relaxing activities. It's wise to avoid television programs that might make your kids excited or feel they need rough and tumble play. If you offer an evening snack, keep away from foods with caffeine, like colas and chocolate which are stimulants and could keep your youngster awake. Better to give fruit, pretzels, or cookies and a little milk.

4. Clean up before bed. Kids often make random messes during their playtime and it is very helpful to the parents to have them put their things away before bed. Children picking up their own things give the parents the ability to spend more time focused on their kids. You are also reinforcing a great habit while your kids are young. The less a parent or caregiver has to be responsible for, the less stress they will have.

5. Consider using the supplement Melatonin. More than two dozen studies have shown that melatonin helps children who have insomnia, and it has few or no side effects. The U.S. Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality in 2005 concluded that melatonin supplements are safe. Children with Aspergers and Autism are often given this supplement because their bodies either don't produce melatonin – or do so only erratically. This is not a treatment for the healthy child who just doesn't want to go to bed or the child with occasional trouble falling asleep. Melatonin is most beneficial for children who suffer brain injuries in which the brain no longer produces enough melatonin. About 15% of pediatricians recommend melatonin to help kids who have insomnia.

6. Create a buffer time to lower down the activity level for an hour or so before bedtime. Find quieter activities such as coloring, reading or playing quietly.

7. Decrease television time and increase your youngster's activities and exercise levels during the day.

8. Eliminate caffeine from your youngster’s diet. Cola drinks and chocolate have significant caffeine.

9. Encourage your kids to find ways to comfort themselves-- maybe holding a stuffed animal, making up a story or imagining a pleasant "dream."

10. Find a balance between being comforting and being firm about the rules. If you've set a rule of "one small drink of water" or "two books," kindly remind your youngster of the rule and then stick to it.

11. Have a bedtime snack. This does not need to be a big deal. It is just a little food to help them tide themselves over to morning and breakfast, which is a long time away. A cheese stick or a small glass of milk and a slice of bread or a handful of crackers is all it takes. Cooking is not required. Sweets are probably not a good idea for many reasons. Having a little something in their stomach before bedtime makes them more comfortable and less likely to sleep lightly or have trouble getting to sleep in the first place.

12. If you feel comfortable about it, you may want to leave on a night light or decorate your youngster's bedroom walls or ceiling with glow-in-the-dark stickers. Having a bit of light reminds kids that there is still light somewhere and that before long, the daylight will come again.

13. If your youngster has had a nightmare, you can assure your youngster that a dream is only a dream, and a dream can’t hurt anybody.

14. Let your youngster know that it's okay if he or she doesn't fall asleep right away, but that it's important to stay in bed.

15. Let your kids know that you understand how disappointed they can get when they have to stop playing and get ready for bed. Just knowing that parents care about their feelings can help kids manage better.

16. Set a bed time. Being consistent is the most important rule with kids. You will find that deciding on a specific bed time and sticking to it will greatly reduce the struggle to get children to bed. When deciding on the time, make sure to consider the different aspects of the youngster’s needs. A youngster needs 10 to 11 hours of sleep to function well during the day. Most kids do not fall asleep right away, so make sure to account for that factor in determining the bed time.

17. Some families find it helpful to leave the bedroom door open a bit, so kids can hear some familiar sounds of the household as they try to fall asleep. If kids do get out of bed, it's best to walk them back to their rooms. Kids need to know their own beds and bedrooms are safe places.

18. Some families put a sticker on a calendar each morning after their youngster was able to stay in bed all night. There may not be many stickers to begin with, but seeing them increase over time can let kids realize that they've been able to manage something that once had been hard for them.

19. Spend ten minutes cuddling with your youngster. This will build a sense of love and security as well as provide a time to calm down.

20. Try to make bedtime the same time each night. Kids understand what's expected of them when they have a routine that's predictable.

21. Tuck them into bed. One method for settling a youngster into bed is the bedtime story. After the children are in their pajamas, tuck them comfortably into their blankets. You can either read to them or tell them a story, making it up as you go. Listening to your voice will help the youngster relax and get comfortable. There are also other options including bed time songs, rhymes and prayers that will help the youngster feel safe and at rest as they get settled down for the night.

22. Use lavender or other aromas in your youngster's room. The scent may help to calm your youngster.

23. Use relaxation tapes as background noise for your youngster when falling asleep. There are many varieties available including nature sounds and calming music. Kids with ADHD often find "white noise" to be calming. You can create white noise by putting a radio on static or running an electric fan.

24. Your youngster might find it comforting to have something of yours to keep through the night, like a glove or a small scarf. Those personal things can help your youngster feel connected with you, even though you're not right there.

25. Give your youngster choices. Some families find their kids are more willing to go through a bedtime routine if they have some control over what particular things they do. Of course there are some things, like bathing and teeth brushing, that need to be part of every healthy family’s “routine.” 

Here is a list of some other rituals you may want to consider:

• give hugs
• listen to quiet music
• read books or tell stories
• say goodnight to things in the room
• say prayers
• sing quiet songs
• spend time cuddling
• talk about what happened today
• talk about what's ahead for tomorrow

More resources for parents of children and teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism:

==> Preventing Meltdowns and Tantrums in Asperger's and HFA Children

==> Discipline for Defiant Asperger's and HFA Teens

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and HFA: How to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Everything You'll Ever Need to Know About Parenting Asperger's Children

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

==> AudioBook: Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger’s and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism


Comments:

• Anonymous said... The strategies mentioned by to for good sleep of our Aspergers child are really fantastic. But to Eliminate caffeine from our youngster’s diet is the most important one I think. Cola drinks and chocolate must be avoided.
• Anonymous said...My 10 year old still has problems. I have tried everything and he still won't go to sleep without one of us in bed with him until he falls asleep. This is the only time we get to ourselves, and it is not happening. I feel frustrated as I he follows me all the time and the only break I get is when he is asleep!
• Anonymous said...My 8 year-old son with aspergers still has issues at bedtime. He insists me or his dad lay down with him until he goes to sleep because he's "lonely". He has a radio and favorite stuffed toys but they are no substitute. We have tried to ween him from this but no luck. Lots of crying and anxiety at bedtime. He ends up going to sleep after 10pm and he's hard to wake up for school. Any suggestions on how to remedy this?
• Anonymous said...My daughter is like this too.....and, refuses to do quiet time
• Anonymous said...My now 11yr old son with aspergers has had problems sleeping in cycles since an infant. Until recently we had quite a long time where if we managed to get him to sleep, he would stay asleep all night. Six months ago we moved and I suddenly had a very content child during the day and an extremely desperate and paranoid child at night. He has begun waking and coming in to us or sneaking into his sisters and sleeping on their floor. It has caused several problems and some nights becomes quite distressing for both my husband and I and all five children. Things have improved from the 40+times he was waking but is still an issue. At one point he was so sleep deprived that our gp recommended that we use a sedative at night for a week or so to regulate his body clock. We reluctantly gave it a go out of sheer desperation but unfortunately it was a very temporary solution. Bribes haven't worked and neither has reassurance, consequences, and all of the strategies above except the melatonin as this is the first I have heard of it. Has anyone had success with any other ideas?
• Anonymous said...No issues going to bed but waking up between 3-5 every day... any tips on this? Thanks. X

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Helping Aspergers and HFA Children Deal with Disappointments

"How can I help my 14-year-old child with high functioning autism to handle disappointments? Almost on a daily basis, he feels mistreated by one of his friends, or something at school doesn’t go just right, or he gets into trouble here at home and receives an undesirable consequence. I don’t want to send him into a depression – but at the same time, I want him to be more resilient and responsible. Also, I’ve heard you talk about how we, as parents of autistic children, tend to be over-protective – and the damage that we do as a result of this kind of parenting. Is there some way I can help him without being over-protective?"

Click here for the answer...

Aspergers and Speech Difficulties

Approximately 50% of kids with Aspergers have delayed speech. While many kids grow out of this by age five, others go on to experience other language difficulties. These generally fall into one or more of the following three areas of linguistics:

1. Pragmatics—

Pragmatics refers to language usage and the way that context relates to meaning. Kids with Aspergers often have difficulty in holding a normal conversation where there is give and take and social interaction. While most people learn these skills by observing others, those with Aspergers may need personal coaching. Problems with pragmatics manifest in the following forms:

• does not allow the other person to talk
• does not use people’s names
• focuses exclusively on topics that interest them
• gives too much detailed information
• interrupting others
• lack of facial expression and eye contact
• lack of greeting
• oblivious to boredom in others
• oblivious to emotional reactions in others

2. Semantics—

Semantics is defined as the meaning or interpretation of a word, sentence, or other language form. While many children with Aspergers are extremely intelligent and avid readers, they often struggle in this particular area. They may have problems with the following:

• difficulty in understanding jokes
• difficulty in understanding metaphors and figures of speech
• interpreting everything literally
• pedantic speech
• problems with understanding teasing
• sarcasm is not understood

3. Prosody—

Prosody refers to the tonal and rhythmic aspects of speech. Kids with Aspergers often have a strange manner of speaking. It may come across with words enunciated precisely and formally and the speed, volume and rhythm may be odd. Problem areas to look out for include the following:

• difficulties in coordinating speaking and breathing
• little or no inflection
• monotonous sound
• stilted or formal speech
• strange rhythms of speech
• talking loudly

How Parents Can Help

Aspergers kids with language problems can benefit from one-on-one training with a parent or speech therapist. The problems are often tackled individually and it takes perseverance and repetition to see lasting results. Methods vary but could include the following:

• practicing eye contact and body language
• practicing normal pronunciation and inflection
• teaching how to start a conversation
• training them not to interrupt
• use of pictures to explain figures of speech

It is never too late to seek help for speech difficulties. The key to success is often a commitment from a parent to work with the youngster for extended periods of time. Here’s how:

1. Don't force your Aspergers youngster to speak correctly and accurately at all times. Allow him to be a kid when you are not helping him with his speech trouble. Keeping on him constantly about speaking appropriately will frustrate and anger him.

2. Catch your child speaking properly and accuse her of being successful. When parents praise a youngster – even for the littlest things – it helps to build her self-esteem and makes her want to try harder to do something. Help your youngster to keep practicing her speech by telling her what a great job she is doing at sounding out words and learning her phonics. When your youngster gets a word down well, write that word down and post it somewhere such as the refrigerator. Then she can see it daily and know what a good job she has done.

3. Have your youngster evaluated by a speech therapist. Your youngster may need more help with his speech than you or any other family can offer. Whether your youngster is delaying in learning words, has trouble sounding words out, or even stutters, a speech therapist can come up with strategies to make speech easier on your youngster and help him to grow his speech skills. Also, a speech therapist can help your youngster deal with the frustrations of his speech trouble. Since a speech therapist has so much experience, she can offer ideas and exercises for relaxing your youngster and helping him stay on track to better speaking.

4. Help your youngster sound out words by encouraging him to take his time with speech. Many kids get frustrated and tire of trying to do something that is tough for them. Most have a small attention span and want to quit doing things after a few minutes of trying. Help your youngster to relax and take time in practicing his speech. Let him know that things that are worth doing well take time and practice and that he'll get it if he just stays calm and focused. Sound the words out with him slowly so that your youngster gets the importance of relaxing when practicing his speech. If you, the parent, are calm, your youngster will be as well.

5. Promote confidence in your youngster to help him deal with the social ramifications of a speech problem. Unfortunately, children can be mean, and your youngster may encounter these cruel children who will make fun of his speech trouble. Your youngster may have a difficult time dealing with this type of bullying treatment and end up not wanting to go to school, be around other children, or even leave the house. Help your youngster to feel good about himself by letting him know all his good qualities. Make a list of things your youngster does well or characteristics he possesses. Give him the list and let him see how amazing he is. Tell him to let you know immediately if any youngster picks on him for his speech trouble. Let your youngster know that this is bullying, and if it happens in school, he needs to tell his teachers.

6. Your youngster needs to see speaking as fun and enjoyable, not a task. Let him talk freely during times when you are not working on his speech with him. Chances are, you'll find him correcting himself – and that's the greatest way to instill confidence in him...allowing him to do it himself.

7. Practice, practice, and then practice some more.

The Aspergers Comprehensive Handbook

Managing Aspergers Meltdowns: Tips for Parents

Sometimes, little emotions are not so little with Aspergers (high functioning autism) children. All of us struggle with emotions – and all of us "lose it" from time to time; however, it's helpful to understand why Aspergers kids may be susceptible to being “driven along” by emotions, rather than being “in charge” of their emotions.

Possible Causes of Meltdowns—

1. Long Term Stress— Combine long term stressors of sensory overload and social challenges, along with all the regular hassles that make up daily living, it's not surprising that Aspergers children may "lose it" over seemingly small situations. As a parent of this child, you may feel bewildered at the intensity of the meltdown.

2. Sensory Overload— Some children with Aspergers are affected by noise, others are affected by smells, textures or lights. It can be any number of things, but too many sensory inputs can lead to meltdowns or shutdowns. It can all happen when the senses get into a major traffic jam.

3. Social Challenges—I was once a tourist in Columbia. The streets did not have signs, and I didn't understand what people were saying. Needless to say, it was stressful. Yet this is what Aspergers kids may go through on a regular basis. Of course, each child is unique, so he may experience more or less of this social confusion, but the stress can take its toll over the course of the day. Too much stress – and the boiling point can be reached.

4. More Stress— If over time an Aspergers child feels that meltdowns are inevitable, random, and uncontrollable, she can feel somewhat stressed out! Imagine not knowing when you will lose it next, or what the consequences may be.

What Can Be Done? 

Here are a few suggestions. Some will work, some won’t. Just as the senses can be bombarded, now your child can use them to self-soothe:

1. Hearing— Have you Aspergers child listen to some beautiful and soothing music. Consider purchasing some meditation CD's. Consider buying CD's with sounds of nature. He may savor the sounds and let them calm him down.

2. Smell— Buy some potpourri or a scented candle and put it in your child’s room. She may enjoy the smells, savor them, and let them calm her down.

3. Taste— Notice what your child’s favorite foods are. Keep some of his favorite foods on hand in small portions. He may really savor the taste, and let it soothe his restlessness.

4. Touch—Massage your child’s shoulders, or go for a walk with him. Maybe he would enjoy lifting weights, martial arts, a warm bath or soft clothes. He may let the touch soothe him and take away his stress.

5. Vision— Buy a beautiful painting or flower. Design a beautiful space in one of the rooms in your house. Light a candle, and watch it quietly with your Aspergers child. Go out in the middle of the night and watch the stars. Be creative. You know best what sights your child will most enjoy. She might notice them, take them in slowly, and let their beauty calm her down.

Tell your child to think of his emotions as wild horses. Untamed, they can wreak havoc. But, once understood and worked with, they can be of great service and power to your Aspergers child.

My Aspergers Child: Preventing Meltdowns

Teaching Tips for Children with Aspergers

Here are the main teaching strategies to keep in mind if you have an Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism) student:



The Complete Guide to Teaching Students with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

Aspergers Children and Homework Problems

A major cause of agony for Aspergers (high functioning autistic) students, their parents and educators is the unsatisfactory completion of homework. These children often have an emotional reaction to the mere thought of having to start their homework – and have difficulty completing assigned tasks. There may be two explanations for this: (1) their degree of stress and mental exhaustion during their day at school, and (2) their cognitive profile.

School-Related Stress—

As with their classroom peers, a youngster with Aspergers has to learn the traditional educational curriculum, but they encounter additional learning experiences and sources of stress than do other kids in their class. They have an additional curriculum, namely the social curriculum. They have to use their intellectual reasoning to determine the social rules of the classroom and the playground. Other kids do not have to consciously learn social integration skills, but Aspergers kids have to decipher the social cues and codes and cognitively determine what to do and say in social situations.

Often their primary feedback is criticism for an error with little recognition from others when they make the correct response. Learning only from your mistakes is not the most efficient way to learn. Thus, Aspergers kids have to concentrate on an extra curriculum that leaves them intellectually and emotionally exhausted at the end of the school day.

They also have difficulty reading and responding to the emotional signals of the educator and other kids, coping with the complex socializing, noise and chaos of the playground, the unexpected changes in the school routine and the intense sensory experiences of a noisy classroom. Throughout the school day, they rarely have an opportunity to relax.

It is essential that teachers recognize the degree of stress experienced by Aspergers students, as the signs can become evident in their behavior and mood. The signs include the youngster who is described as a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde in that the indicators of stress are not conspicuous at school, but the youngster is a very different character at home. They may be quiet and compliant in the classroom, but intolerant and aggressive immediately they return home.

Some Aspergers kids become extremely anxious in the morning before going to school, and school refusal or walking out of school can be a sign of unbearable stress. Other kids can express the signs at school by episodes of extreme anxiety or anger, with incidents of panic or disruptive and explosive behavior. Others suffer chronic stress, which contributes to a clinical depression.

Kids with Aspergers who are having difficulty learning the social curriculum and coping with the stress of school often explain that they want a clear division between home and school. Their general view is "school is for learning, and home is for fun or relaxation." Thus, the prospect of interrupting their much needed and deserved fun and relaxation with homework is more than they can cope with.

Cognitive Profile—

Kids with Aspergers have an unusual profile of cognitive skills that must be recognized and accommodated when they are undertaking academic work at school and home. One aspect of the profile is impaired executive function. The profile is similar to that of kids with ADD in that they can have difficulty planning, organizing and prioritizing, a tendency to be impulsive and inflexible when problem solving and poor working memory. Other features include a difficulty generating new ideas, a need for supervision and guidance and determining what is relevant and redundant as well as poor time perception and time management. There is also the likelihood of an unusual profile on standardized tests of intelligence, especially with regard to verbal and visual intelligence.

Some kids are ‘verbally-oriented’ and have a relative strength in reading, vocabulary and verbal concepts, while others are ‘visually-oriented’ and ‘a picture is worth a thousand words’. The youngster’s cognitive and learning profile is usually recognized by school authorities and special provision made for the youngster in terms of an assistant in the classroom to facilitate their academic progress. The educator knows how to adapt the curriculum for a youngster with Aspergers, but this knowledge and service are not usually available at home.

The following range of strategies are designed to minimize the impaired executive function, accommodate their profile of cognitive skills, and help Aspergers youngsters complete their homework assignments with less stress for the youngster and family.

Learning Environment—

1. A daily homework timetable can be made by a mother/father with guidance from the educator to define the expected duration and content of each homework activity or assignment. This can be extremely helpful if there are problems with the youngster’s allocation of time to each homework component. Sometimes the homework can take hours when the teacher intended only several minutes on a specified task.

2. A timer can be used to remind the youngster how much time is remaining to complete each section of homework. It is also important to ensure that time scheduled for homework does not coincide with the youngster’s favorite television program. If it does, they may have priority use of the video recorder and can watch the program after their homework.

3. If regular breaks are necessary to promote concentration, the work can be divided into segments to indicate how much work the youngster has to complete before they can take a momentary break. The usual mistake is to expect too much prolonged concentration.

4. The area where the youngster works must be conducive to concentration and learning. A useful model is the youngster’s classroom with appropriate seating, lighting and removal of any distractions. The distractions can be visual such as the presence of toys or television, which are a constant reminder of what the youngster would rather be doing or auditory distraction such as the noise from electrical appliances and the chatter of siblings. Ensure the working surface only has equipment relevant to the task. Their working environment must also be safe from curious siblings.

Preparation of Homework—

The educator can highlight key aspects of the homework sheet, written material and questions so that the youngster knows which aspects are relevant to their preparation of the assignment. They can ask the youngster to formulate their plan before commencing the assignment to ensure their work is coherent and logical, especially if the homework is an essay. If the assignment takes several days to complete, it is important that the educator regularly reviews the youngster’s rough drafts and progress, which also increases the likelihood that it will be completed on time.

Memory Problems—

1. If the Aspergers youngster has difficulty remembering exactly what was set for homework and remembering relevant information during homework, a characteristic of impaired executive function, a solution is to buy an executive toy. A small digital recorder used for dictation can provide a record of the educator’s spoken instructions and the youngster can add his or her own comments or personal memo to the recording to remind them of key information. The youngster and their mother/father will then know exactly what was said and what is relevant to the task.

2. Another strategy is to have the telephone number of another youngster in the class to ask them for the relevant information.

3. A homework diary and planner can help the youngster remember which books to take home and the specific homework for each evening. An executive diary from a stationary store may make this strategy more appealing to the youngster. The techniques are explained as being appropriate for adult executives rather than for kids with learning problems.

Supervision—

The youngster may have difficulty getting started or knowing what to do first. Procrastination can be an issue and a mother/father may have to supervise the start of the homework. Once the youngster has started, this is not the end of the supervision. A parent will also need to be available if the youngster requires assistance when they are confused and to ensure that they have chosen the appropriate strategy. There can be a tendency for such kids to have a closed mind to alternative strategies and a determination to pursue an approach when other kids would have recognized the signs that it would be wise to consider another approach. A technique to show that there is more than one line of thought is to provide the youngster with a list of alternative strategies to solve the particular problem. The youngster may need to know there is a plan ‘B’.

Moms and dads and educators soon become aware of the degree of supervision required which can be a major problem for a mother/father with other family commitments when the youngster is doing their homework. Supervision is also necessary to help the youngster priorities, plan, assist with word retrieval problems and maintain motivation. Motivation can be enhanced by specific rewards for concentration and effort

Emotional Management—

Kids with Aspergers are notorious for their difficulty coping with frustration and criticism, and their inability to manage their emotions. They can become quite agitated when confused or having made a mistake. A grown-up will need to be available to help the youngster remain calm and logical. The adult will also need to model calmness, which can be difficult when both youngster and adult are confused as to what to do. It can end in tears for both parties.

Cognitive Style—

1. One characteristic is a difficulty explaining their reasoning using speech. The youngster may provide the correct solution to a mathematical problem, but not be able to use words to explain how they achieved the answer. Their cognitive strategies may be unconventional and intuitive rather than deductive. One may need to accept their correct solution even if the logic is unclear to the neurotypical mind. One problem with this characteristic is that it may be difficult for the mother/father to correct the alternative reasoning when the youngster has a ‘mental block’.

2. If the mother/father is unable to help the youngster solve a particular problem, a solution is to come to an arrangement with the teacher where by he/she is contacted by telephone without hesitation as to the time of day or night and they can talk directly to the youngster. Regular use of this approach can lead to a significant reduction in the type and amount of homework.

3. Kids with Aspergers often enjoy having access to a computer and may be more able to understand material if it is presented on a computer screen. Material presented by a person adds a social and linguistic dimension to the situation, which can increase the youngster’s confusion. Educators should consider adapting the homework so that a considerable proportion of the work is conducted using a computer. Word processing facilities, especially graphics and grammar and spell check programs are invaluable in improving the legibility and quality of the finished product.

4. Kids with Aspergers require special consideration when learning new material. Homework should primarily be designed to consolidate and practice known information rather than introducing new concepts.

5. Special consideration should be given to the youngster’s cognitive strengths and weaknesses. If the youngster’s relative strength is in visual reasoning, then flow diagrams, mind maps and demonstrations will enhance their understanding. If their strength is in verbal skills then written instructions and discussion using metaphors (especially metaphors associated with their special interest) will help. Additional strategies include the use of a computer and keyboard, especially for those kids who have problems with handwriting. Sometimes a mother/father acts as an ‘executive’ secretary and types the material for the youngster and proof reads their answers. Homework may be a collaborative rather than solitary activity. The parent is not being over protective or neurotic, they just know that without their involvement, the work would not be done.

6. Teaching a youngster with Aspergers requires special skills and a mother/father is not expected to have those skills. As a parent, one is also more emotionally involved than a class teacher and it can be difficult for them to be objective and emotionally detached. One option is to hire a homework tutor to provide the skilled guidance and supervision. However, this may be beyond the financial resources of most families.

Completing Homework at School—

If homework is associated with a lot of stress and agony, there are a few things that can be done to (a) reduce the despair of the youngster who is exhausted from his day at school, (b) the mother/father who tries to motivate their youngster, and (c) the educator who recognizes that homework is not the most effective means of education for such a child. If the regular amount of homework is demanded of the youngster, then everyone must recognize the considerable degree of time and commitment that is necessary from all parties to ensure it is completed satisfactorily and on time.

One option is to enable the Aspergers youngster to complete his ‘homework’ at school. It can be undertaken at lunchtime and before or after classes in their home class or the school library. However, they would still require supervision and guidance from a teacher or assistant. In high school, some kids have been able to graduate taking fewer subjects and the extra time available in the school day dedicated to homework.

Being Exempted from Doing Homework—

If all these techniques are unsuccessful, here is a last ditch effort: Allow the Aspergers student to be exempted from doing homework – yes, you heard correctly – exempted! If the strategies outlined above are unsuccessful or unable to be implemented, then forget about homework. Sometimes this advice is to the great relief of the youngster, his mother and father, and the educator.

More resources for parents of children and teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism:

==> Preventing Meltdowns and Tantrums in Asperger's Children

==> Discipline for Defiant Asperger's Teens

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's: How to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Everything You'll Ever Need to Know About Parenting Asperger's Children

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

==> AudioBook: Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger’s and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said… We struggled for so long with this every night it was taking 2 hours to do, most of that was us telling him what to write. We eventually asked his teacher what kind of credit he was getting out of the two hours of work he was struggling to do, she simply said none. I asked my son one day what does she do with your homework when you turn it in? He said nothing she throws it in the trash. Well I told him to stop doing it. So of course he went back to school and when he didn't have his homework done she asked where is it. My son simply said Mom and Dad said I don't have to do it anymore. This was before we had a diagnosis and after a year of right ups and ISS, you name it.
•    Anonymous said… We also have struggled with this for many years our son is now 14 we gave up I would rather have quality time than yelling n tantrums every day especially as we have 3 kids in total homework I believe is not the be all and end all of schooling... With very high anxiety it is not worth the battle.. Hope u find a happy medium.
•    Anonymous said… Homework is a toughie. It's hard after school because our kids need space to recover from the day. I talk to the teachers about giving my son the absolute minimum. Then I use a visual board that sits next to his homework spot and I give him rewards for completing each task. I try to step back and not take on responsibility for it. It is his homework and my goal is to provide the structure and communicate with the teacher if he is to wrecked to do it. I hope this helps but it is hard.

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