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Gaze Avoidance in Aspergers and HFA Children

I have a student with autism (high functioning) who always appears to be staring off into space. I have asked him to look me in the eye when trying to get his attention - and he will make eye contact for a split second - but then look off again. Is there some way to get through to him and help him focus?

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==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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Noise Sensitivities [Hyperacusis] in Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

Question

My son has Asperger's syndrome and is sensitive and has a meltdown if I talk or anyone else talks to loudly, because he said he doesn't like loud voices or yelling. He is 22 and can't hold down a job. His social worker raises her voice often when talking to him. He said he requested for her to talk more calmly to him because the conversations repeat in his head for hours if she talks to loud or says something in a tone that could be taken the wrong way if interpreted literally. She refused. Is that wrong? Should someone respect his wishes and talk more calmly if they know he has Asperger's and it causes him so much anxiety and hours of conversation analysis and repeating and he told them so, especially to someone like a social worker? Thanks.

Answer

You may want to consider educating your son's social worker about hyperacusis, which is a disorder characterized by oversensitivity to certain frequency ranges of sound. An individual with severe hyperacusis has trouble tolerating everyday sounds, most of which might seem unpleasantly noisy to that particular individual but not to other people. The disorder is often chronic and usually accompanied by tinnitus (i.e., ringing in the ears), but can occur in people who have little or no measurable hearing loss.

Hyperacusis can come on suddenly or gradually. It can initially affect only one ear, but generally, within a short time, the condition is almost always bilateral. It can be mild or severe. Hyperacusis is more common in children with:

• attention deficit disorder (ADD)
• autism and autistic-like behaviors
• central auditory processing disorder
• head injury
• learning disabilities

It may be developed due to injury sustained to the inner ear. There is conjecture that the efferent part (i.e., fibers that originate in the brain which serve to regulate sounds) associated with the auditory nerve (i.e., olivocochlear bundle) has been impacted. This particular theory shows that the efferent fibers from the auditory nerve are uniquely damaged, while the hair cells that permit the hearing of pure tones in an audiometric evaluation stay intact.

In cases not involving aural injury to the inner ear, hyperacusis may also be developed due to injury to the brain or the neurological system. In these instances, hyperacusis can be explained as a cerebral processing problem specific to how the brain interprets sound. In extraordinary instances, hyperacusis might be the result of a vestibular disorder. This kind of hyperacusis, called vestibular hyperacusis, is brought on by the brain perceiving particular sounds as motion input in addition to auditory input. 40% of tinnitus sufferers complain of mild hyperacusis.

A crying baby, a car with screechy brakes, turning newspaper pages, running water in the kitchen sink, a child placing dishes and silverware on the table – all are intolerable to the ears of someone with hyperacusis.

Causes-

The most typical reason for hyperacusis is over-exposure to exorbitant decibel levels (or sound pressure levels). Many people get hyperacusis abruptly by way of:

• firing a gun
• having an airbag deploy in their car
• experiencing any extremely loud sound
• head injury
• Lyme disease
• Ménière's disease
• surgery
• taking ear sensitizing drugs
• TMD (Temporomandibular joint disorder)

Others are born with sound sensitivity (Superior Canal Dehiscence Syndrome), or have experienced a history of ear infections, or come from a family that has had hearing difficulties.

Causes include, but are not restricted to:

• A vestibular disorder
• Adverse drug reaction
• Asperger syndrome
• Autism
• Bell's palsy
• Chronic ear infections
• Ear irrigation
• Facial nerve dysfunction
• MAO inhibitor discontinuation syndrome
• Ménière's disease
• Migraine
• Minor head injury
• Severe head trauma
• Superior canal dehiscence syndrome (SCDS)
• Surgery
• Tay-Sachs Disease
• Temporomandibular joint disorder (TMJ)
• Tension Myositis Syndrome
• Williams Syndrome

Symptoms-

In cochlear hyperacusis (the most common form of hyperacusis), the symptoms are ear discomfort, irritation, and general intolerance to any sounds that most individuals don't notice or consider uncomfortable. Crying spells or anxiety attacks might derive from cochlear hyperacusis. Up to 86% of hyperacusis sufferers also have tinnitus.

In vestibular hyperacusis, the sufferer may experience feelings of lightheadedness, nausea or vomiting, or perhaps a lack of balance when sounds of certain pitches are present (e.g., they may feel like they are falling, and as a result, involuntarily grimace and clutch for something to brace themselves with). The degree to which a sufferer is impacted is dependent not only on the overall severity of the person's signs and symptoms, but additionally on whether the individual can identify sounds in that frequency range at the volume in question, and also on the individual's pre-existing muscle tone and severity of startle response.

Anxiety, stress, and/or phonophobia might be present in both kinds of hyperacusis. Somebody with either type of hyperacusis might adopt avoidant behavior in order to stay away from any nerve-racking sound situations or to prevent embarrassing themselves in a social situation that may include painful sounds.

An individual struggling with hyperacusis may be shocked by really low sound levels. Daily sounds may hurt his/her ears, for example:

• chewing gum
• cooking
• dishes
• eating
• normal conversation
• ringing phones
• running water
• shutting doors
• television
• ticking clocks

The person who has hyperacusis can't simply get up and walk away from noise. Instead, the volume on the whole world seems stuck on high. In the worst case scenario, even the use of earplugs does not provide comfort, and the individual might spend his life attempting to avoid all noises and merely stay home.

Treatment-

Steroids are used to treat hyperacusis within 72 hours of the onset of the condition.

The most typical treatment for hyperacusis is retraining therapy, which uses broadband noise. Tinnitus Retraining Therapy (TRT), a treatment originally used to treat tinnitus, uses broadband noise to treat hyperacusis.

Pink noise may also be used to treat hyperacusis. By listening to broadband noise at soft levels for a disciplined period of time each day, patients can rebuild their tolerances to sound.

When looking for treatment, it is important that the doctor determine the patient's Loudness Discomfort Levels (LDL) so that hearing tests (brainstem auditory evoke response) or other diagnostic tests which involve loud noise (MRI) do not worsen the patient's tolerance to sound.

Hyperacusis makes living in this noisy world difficult and dramatically changes a person's life-style. Moving about, traveling, and communicating with others is challenging. Ear protection must be worn in areas that seem too loud. This includes earplugs, industrial earmuffs, or both if necessary.

Individuals who suspect they may have hyperacusis should seek an evaluation by an otolaryngologist (i.e., an ear, nose, and throat doctor). The initial consultation is likely to include a full audiologic evaluation (with a hearing test), a recording of medical history, and a medical evaluation by a physician. Counseling about evaluation findings and treatment options may also be provided at that time.


More resources for parents of children and teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism:


COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said…  My daughter has just been diagnosed with Hyperacusis. It took years of me begging for help. Apparently it is very common with Asperges . It sounds like your son could have this and there is help. I would ask your doctor for a referral to your local hearing hospital.
•    Anonymous said… autistic people get over looked for jobs all the time. Oh here's an idea, and I have said this before, many times to my son and others. There is a desperate need for there to be more autistic people working in the system with autistic people! Even Professor Tony Attwood thinks it would be great if there was a service provided by autistic people for autistic people. Shame the government can't have some common sense and legislate such a thing, would solve both issues. After all, people can read all they like about something, they will never know exactly how it feels, unless they actualy experiance it. This social worker sounds like exactly the kind of person who should not be doing that kind of job. Selfish, disrespectful, ignorent, and uncaring. Ask for a different one and refuse to allow this one any where near your son. If he has said he does not like her raising her voice, and explained why, she should respect that, not simpley disregard his wishes. Sorry you and your son have to deal with this.
•    Anonymous said… Good for him for being able to explain and ask for what he needs! I'd definitely ask for another worker, she clearly doesn't "get" him...
•    Anonymous said… He can wear light ear plugs that allow him to hear at a lower tone. Some kids wear them to church because of the music and singing.
•    Anonymous said… Hey folks.....there is still such a thing as common courtesy (I think)! If ANYONE asks you to "tone it down"....do it! How rude! And unprofessional! And obnoxious! And crass!
•    Anonymous said… I hate when ppl do this to my son! It's like your voice is hurting my son's ears and tone it down already! But then they point out he talks very loudly all the time. But I ask we'll can you hear your own voice when your all alone..... Does it sound normal,high or low? They don't know or can't say, okay well the same goes for him. He can't tell if his voice is high or low, because he has sensory processing disorder and hears everything at the same level and that dial is stuck on loud. And when ppl whisper he only gets partial words or words sound different then they should, or hat sounds like Cat. So he has to work even harder to make sense of what's being sad to him. Sensory issues are a huge deal for our kids and myself included, but ppl are tend to take my word for it because I'm a adult/mom with Aspergers then if a child with Aspergers is struggling with the sensory world and saying that certain things are affecting him.
•    Anonymous said… I would talk to a supervisor and get switched to a different social worker.
•    Anonymous said… It's insane that someone wouldn't abide by the simple wish. My grandson is the same and his teachers just don't get it. Also, strangely enough, it sets him off to be whispered to. Has anyone else heard of this??
•    Anonymous said… She should not be yelling. Go above her and speak to a supervisor. Your son should be treated with respect.
•    Anonymous said… The ADA states he can "ask for an interpreter" and that's not limited to foreign languages! Time to let the Social Worker know she is in violation of the ADA! Put it in writing what has happen before, how the sw responds, why he needs to have an interpreter, what he expects the interpreter will do and how it will help him - be very clear. Next, send the social worker, her supervisor and the area/district supervisor a copy of the request letter, with a signed receipt from the post office so you can prove they got a copy. Good Luck!
•    Anonymous said… There are hearing aids that work by modulating noise that could help. Hearing aid providers almost always offer a free exam.
•    Anonymous said… There shouldn't be any need for a social worker to raise their voice to him at all. I would request someone else.

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Aspergers/HFA Teens and Suicide

"Can teenagers with ASD Level 1 (high functioning autism) become so depressed that they become a risk for suicide?"

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==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

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==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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Do you need the advice of a professional who specializes in parenting children and teens with Autism Spectrum Disorders?  Sign-up for Online Parent Coaching today.

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Special Needs Students and Poor Reading Comprehension

I have an student (high functioning) who is in 2nd grade and reads at a grade 4 level. While his level is 4, his comprehension is extremely poor. Is there some way to push his reading forward, yet address his comprehension issue? Some of the other teachers believe that I should not push him in his reading level …they said the focus should be on comprehension. I would like for him to continue reading at the level he is challenged at, while addressing his comprehension. What are your thoughts?

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==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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Aspergers, ADHD, and ODD

Question

My 8 year old Aspie also has ADHD and Oppositional Defiant Disorder [ODD]. I can deal with the ADHD and the Aspergers …it’s the ODD I am having a hard time with. How do deal with it and what works with dealing with this disorder? What do you do as far as discipline? We are at our wits end with this part of his diagnoses and would love some advice.

Answer

Aspergers (high-functioning autism) is often not be the only psychological condition affecting a particular youngster. In fact, it frequently coexists with other problems such as:
  • Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)
  • Bipolar Disorder
  • Depression (Major Depressive Disorder or Adjustment Disorder with Depressed Mood)
  • Generalized Anxiety Disorder
  • Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
  • Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)

Oppositional Defiant Disorder, also known as ODD, is a psychiatric behavior disorder that is characterized by aggressiveness and a tendency to purposefully bother and irritate others.

DSM delineates the criteria for ODD as follows:

A. A pattern of negativistic, hostile, and defiant behavior lasting at least six months during which four or more of the following are present: often loses temper, often argues with adults, often actively defies or refuses to comply with adult requests or rules, often deliberately annoys people, often blames others for his or her mistakes or misbehavior, is often touchy or easily annoyed by others, is often angry and resentful, is often spiteful or vindictive.

B. The disturbance in behavior causes clinically significant impairment in social, academic, or occupational functions.

C. The behaviors do not occur exclusively during the course of psychotic or mood disorder.

D. Criteria are not met for Conduct Disorder, and if the individual is age 18 years or older, criteria are not met for Anti-social Personality Disorder.

Facts on Oppositional Defiant Disorder—
  • 15% of ODD kids develop some form of personality disorder
  • 20% of kids with ODD have some form of mood disorder, such as Bipolar Disorder or anxiety
  • 35% of these kids develop some type of affective disorder
  • 50-65% of ODD kids also have ADD or ADHD
  • 75% of kids with Oppositional Defiant Disorder above the age of eight will still be defiant later in life
  • Kids with CD and ODD are also at high risk for criminality and antisocial personality disorders in adulthood
  • Many of these kids have learning disorders
  • ODD is more common in boys than in girls before puberty
  • ODD is reported to affect between 2 and 16 percent of kids
  • Once kids enter adolescence, it is extremely difficult for moms and dads to change the ODD behavior

Symptoms of Oppositional Defiant Disorder—

Kids with ODD show defiant, hostile, and negativistic behaviors lasting at least six months, of which four or more of the following behaviors are present:
  • actively defies or refuses to comply with adults' requests or rules
  • argues with adults
  • blames others for his or her mistakes
  • deliberately annoys people
  • is angry or resentful
  • is spiteful and vindictive
  • loses temper
  • mean and hateful talking when upset
  • often being touchy or easily annoyed by others
  • seeking revenge

Causes of Oppositional Defiant Disorder—

There has been no systematic research into the causes of ODD; however, there are two theories as follows:

• Learning Theory: ODD comes as a response to negative interactions. The techniques used by moms and dads and authority figures bring about the oppositional defiant behavior.

• Developmental Theory: ODD is really a result of incomplete development. For some reason, ODD kids don't master the tasks that other kids master during their toddler years. They get stuck in the toddler stage (2-3 years old) and never really grow out of it.

Treatment of Oppositional Defiant Disorder—
  • Cognitive-Behavioral Psychotherapy to assist in problem solving and decrease negativity
  • Family Psychotherapy to improve communication
  • Individual Psychotherapy to develop effective anger management
  • Parent Training Programs to help manage behavior
  • Social Skills Training to increase flexibility and improve tolerance to frustration with peers
  • Stimulant Medication is prescribed only when ODD is accompanied by another disorder such as ADD or ADHD

Treatment is particularly important because kids with ODD are also at high risk for criminality and antisocial personality disorders in adulthood.

What Moms and Dads Can Do—
  1. Avoid power struggles.
  2. Build on the positives.
  3. Establish a schedule for the family that includes specific meals that will be eaten at home together, and specific activities one or both parents will do with the Aspergers child.
  4. Exercise and relax. Use respite care as needed.
  5. Give effective timeouts.
  6. Give the youngster praise and positive reinforcement when he shows flexibility or cooperation.
  7. Limit consequences to those that can be consistently reinforced and if possible, last for a limited amount of time.
  8. Manage your stress.
  9. Offer acceptable choices to your Aspergers child, giving him a certain amount of control.
  10. Pick your battles carefully.
  11. Prioritize the things you want your youngster to do.
  12. Remain calm and unemotional in the face of opposition.
  13. Set up reasonable, age-appropriate limits with consequences that can be enforced consistently.
  14. Stay involved in things other than your youngster with ODD, so that your youngster doesn't take up all of your time and energy.
  15. Take a break if you are about to make the conflict with your youngster worse. This is good modeling, so be sure to support your youngster if he decides to take a time-out to prevent overreacting.
  16. Try to work with other adults that are involved with your youngster, such as educators, coaches, and your husband or wife.

What Teachers Can Do—

It is important for educators to be aware of the disorders that their students are suffering from. Educators may or may not see symptoms of ODD at school. Even if the symptoms are not present at school, it is helpful to know what the moms and dads are dealing with at home. The more you communicate with the family and understand the situation, the better you will be able to help.

Click here for a complete parenting-course on how to deal with the Aspergers child who also has Oppositional Defiant Disorder.

Aspergers versus Nonverbal Learning Disorder: What’s the Difference?

Question

My 4-year-old was diagnosed with Aspergers a month ago. I went for a second opinion, and that doctor doesn’t think she has Aspergers – he thinks it is NVLD. So I was reading about them and I understand that they are very similar (except that with AS, they have obsessions). My daughter does not have anything she is obsessed with, but she does need structure and routine throughout the day to regulate herself. My daughter also has Sensory Integration Disorder, which from what I understand can coexist with AS. I don’t know if I should get a 3rd opinion or just keep the Aspergers diagnosis so she can get services in school. The doctor that says he thinks it is NVLD said that Aspergers usually isn’t diagnosed until age 5 or 6, which I don’t think is true. I am just looking for your input.

Answer

There is often confusion between Aspergers (high functioning autism) and Nonverbal Learning Disabilities (NLD). In fact, sometimes these two terms are mistakenly used interchangeably. There are some basic differences though.

NLD is not included with Aspergers and Autism under the DSM-IV’s umbrella term of Pervasive Developmental Disorders. Both Aspergers and NLD children may show similar social and attentional difficulties, strong verbal skills and a confusing display of strengths and weaknesses. There are a few key items that help in a differential diagnosis though:
  • if the child is helped rather than hindered by your verbal explanations, then look to NLD
  • if the child’s skill at deriving meaning from what he sees is a strength, then it’s more likely he has Aspergers

The Aspergers profile of neuro-psychological assets and deficits is very similar to the NLD profile. Both have neuro-developmental abnormalities involving functions of the right cerebral hemisphere. In both disorders, there is no delay in cognitive development and speech. In fact, early verbal ability is one of the hallmarks of NLD; children with NLD are often extremely verbal and early readers.

Aspergers has been conceptualized as a "Non-Verbal Learning Disability". A comparison of NLD and Aspergers children revealed 20 out of 21 similarities, including a verbal over spatial discrepancy. Aspergers may be an extreme form of NLD.

Both Aspergers and NLD children seek out social interaction, but are often rejected by their peers. A related problem shared by both disorders is the inability to perceive or understand nonverbal cues (i.e., they are oblivious to nuances of facial expressions, body language, tone of voice, gestures, and appropriate spatial distance). Children without Aspergers or NLD use eye contact appropriately and understand that you can tell how someone feels by looking at their face. These cues are "invisible" to those with Aspergers and NLD.

The most significant problem for both Aspergers and NLD children is in the area of social relationships, whether at home or school:
  • exclusion and rejection become part of life
  • living with this social disability and constant rejection often leads to uncertainty, confusion, insecurity, depression, and anxiety, which they may try to relieve by creating routines and rituals
  • they are often accused of rudeness, laziness, lack of caring, or a poor attitude
  • they are often misunderstood
  • they can't "connect" socially
  • wanting to make friends and fit in, but unable to, they may respond by withdrawing, acting out with emotional outbursts, or refusing to cooperate

Aspergers and NLD diverge in the affective area. Aspergers children do not feel the same range of emotions as children with NLD. Though they may feel very deeply about many things, they may not cry or smile when it's deemed appropriate. They often have a flat affect, and have difficulty with initiating or experiencing normal social relationships. Conversely, children with NLD have normal emotions, but are inept in expressing them - and in recognizing them in others - to the extent that they are expressed non-verbally.

Children with Aspergers generally have greater social problems. Their highly restricted interests present an additional obstacle to their social functioning. These restricted interests seem to be idiosyncratic to Aspergers children (“restricted interests” is not mentioned in the literature about NLD). This is the main difference between the two disorders, as they are most frequently defined clinically. The Aspergers child’s odd behaviors (e.g., rocking, flapping) can also contribute to his social problems (behaviors that are not present in NLD). In contrast, the NLD child’s social ineptness is mainly due to his inability to read nonverbal communication (e.g., facial expressions and gestures).

Literature on Aspergers doesn't mention problems with visual spatial issues, which are a major problem area for children with NLD. In fact, many “Aspies” respond well to visuals and diagrams, and are visual learners. Many find work as engineers or architects. In contrast, Children with NLD don't respond to physical demonstrations and may not understand diagrams. They can't learn by watching, and need everything explained in words. Thus, these children tend to become wordsmiths (e.g., teachers and writers) while “Aspies” often excel in math and find work in computer fields.


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==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

____________________

Do you need the advice of a professional who specializes in parenting children and teens with Autism Spectrum Disorders?  Sign-up for Online Parent Coaching today.

____________________


COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said… Aspergers is no longer diagnosed. She should be diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Level I. NVLD is not diagnosable via the DSM 5. Autism is diagnosed young which is important because she will likely need individual therapy, occupational therapy, and a social thinking group.
•    Anonymous said… Don't forget that Aspergers in girls also presents quite differently in part to Aspergers in boys. I feel strongly that any assistance DNS therapy is personalised on the child's individual needs based on the further assessments so take whichever diagnosis will allow you to access the help you need, it won't affect the outcomes
•    Anonymous said… Each child doesn't have to hit every single box to be diagnosed-for my son I do not notice any flapping or rocking-- He is an Aspie but I have also noticed the older he gets the less sensory issues he has- they are so mild now- mostly hands in early am- ot says from no pressure on them all night so am is pretty brutal- he describes them as way to soft- but rest of day very mild if at all- hoodie now just when he is in strange place- it used to be hoodie all the time everywhere even when he was at home watching tv- so the demonstration of penguin  🐧 saying every one  ☝ on spectrum is different is so so true! And I'm realizing he is mastering issues within his self so well! Also as far as interest he does have only one at a time just like friends - only one at a time- but that's his interest - and it seems more like an interest to me v/s obsession--when he was smaller it seemed more like an obsession- strange how things start balancing more as they get older- I'm sure his ot and phyc therapy is doing great things as well!
•    Anonymous said… I had many many doctors/therapists fail to give the correct diagnosis for my daughter with Aspergers -they diagnosed her with generalized anxiety which was correct but it stems from aspergers - she also has sensory issues - I knew that she was on the spectrum but no one else believed it to be true - so go with your gut - truly Mom's know their child best - I wish I did so that I got my child the correct therapy when she was younger -
•    Anonymous said… My daughter has a Aspergers diagnosis. At age 4 she did not obsess over anything, but at age 10 she shows plenty of obsessive behaviors. Things can change over time I guess, so I wouldn't rule out Aspergers based on that behavior not presenting at 4, it may show up as she matures.
•    Anonymous said… My Son has NVLD and my daughter has Aspergers, they are similar but different. This was interesting to read and realize the differences they do have.
•    Anonymous said… My son was diagnosed with Asperger's at 6 & 1/2. I'm not sure what you do if you feel like the diagnosis doesn't quite fit because with our son it's definitely exactly who he is. I can say the extra help to get him through his school day has made a world of difference. The school classifies him as High Functioning Autistic. He almost failed first grade and in third grade,last year, he made honor roll every marking period.. Teacher's knowing your child has a disability instead of thinking he/she is just a disruptive child makes a world of difference in how they are treated and your child's comfort level in school. Right now I think it's a matter of which diagnosis will get you the services you need at the school. If there is a way to make sure the teacher's will work with you to help her work on transitioning through her school day and with her sensory issues then maybe you could even wait on submitting a diagnosis to the school until Kindergarten or 1st grade when there days have a lot more school work and sitting still during the day. It may make it more clear to everyone what her most pressing issues will be moving forward and what diagnosis is most accurate.
•    Anonymous said… My son was diagnosed with NVLD at 10 and it didn't seem to fit from the first moment. I'm still trying to figure out where to go from there. My hunch as he was mildly on the sprctrum. I wish I understood NLVD well enough to know my next steps better.
•    Anonymous said… They dont have to be obsessed with something, sometimes it could be that they like things a curtin way "obsession stands for a broad range of things. Most doctors totally miss understand aspergers and only look for specific things instead of just different quirks about the child and getting the sensory side of things right. There is no list every person is different so therefore there should not be one set list. Apsergers would have to be one of the most complex things to understand on the planet and thats comming from a mother who has aspergers and 3 of her children and each one of us carries different symptoms and tics and quirks. :) ive come to realize a good 90% of the world actually have it in some way
•    Anonymous said… We were told my daughter has aspergers too at the age of 5, she is 7 now and does get help from school. When I look at the criteria for Aspergers alone, it's nothing like her. But then when I look at HFA highly functioning autism or highly sensitive aspergers it's her to a tea!! She is also on the waiting list for autism and adhd too. The thing is with these Is that the spectrum is so huge it is difficult to say exactly what boxes she ticks. The main point is, that is will be able to get some form of help and hopefully it will help your daughter overcome some of her issues. Good luck xx
•    Anonymous said… Yes, our daughter was diagnosed at 4 with NLD. (Non-verbal). We felt that there was more to it than that. Someone else in this thread said that you don't have to check every box to have AS, and I agree. We are looking into AS now because it seems to fit better. We lived in OK when she was diagnosed and now live in UT. Here it seems no one recognizes NLD as a diagnoses. They tend to think it's something diagnosticians use when they have nowhere else to turn and aren't certain on the results. You may also look into PDD-NOS. it's also on the spectrum, but is a little different than Aspergers. I also feel 4 is a young age to diagnose definitively, and it may change over time, but if you have an AS diagnosis I would run with it. It's not the name that matters, it's the symptoms. If you can get better help with one diagnoses than another, I'd say take it! Our babies need the most help they can get. If you want to talk more, I'd love to visit. Just PM me. We all need friends, including me!

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Problems Getting Up In The Morning: Help for Aspergers and HFA Teens

Hello Mark,

I recently purchased your eBook "Launching Adult Children w/Aspergers" ...It's nicely laid out/a very useful tool indeed! I do have a question for you:

My son and I had a heart-to-heart conversation last night, as a result of getting into an altercation with him one morning. I'm beginning to understand his thoughts/ways more and more. I realize that 'patience' is a must and as you stated it is important to keep one thing at the fore-front of our minds...."Everyone has good intentions!" These kids do not do things to deliberately send our emotions reeling/upset us. With all of that said, my son has great difficulty getting up on time in the morning and as a result he doesn't get to eat breakfast and prepare his lunch before departing. As a Mom I get upset w/him, concerned about his well-being; he is quite thin to begin with. He told me last night that he doesn't want any help from us that he has to be the one to solve his own problem. I was actually shocked w/what he said, however, my concern is that he will not get up for school or will miss the bus, which would not make for a good morning/I would end up being late for work. I will obviously respect his wishes/not interfere, however, my intuition tells me that he will not wake up on time and actually be missing the bus. What course of action would I then take, assuming his best efforts result in failure? I do not want to get confrontational with my son and do more harm. How can I motivate him to get up if he doesn't wake up with the alarm clock going off...??

Do I take away his IPOD/DS Game/TV privileges for an indefinite period of time...? Appreciate your thoughts on the matter. Thanks! L.


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ASD: Difficulty Identifying and Interpreting Emotional Signals in Others

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