Best Aspergers Blogs: Support Groups for People Affected by Aspergers Syndrome

Dealing with Aspergers can be hard on a family. Making sure you have the proper support group can make a world of difference. There is help out there, and you are not alone in this journey. Here are the top Aspergers blogs according to Google:

1. Adult Aspergers: Hear from an adult who has dealt with Aspergers first hand. Get the support you need and also the information to help you handle Aspergers.
2. Adult Aspergers: If you are living with Aspergers yourself or if you have an adult loved one dealing with it, you can find support through here. Meet with groups who are making it through the challenges just like you.
3. Are They Rude?: People ask this question a lot but one brave man dealing with Aspergers explains it to you. Also you can find support and information here if your loved one is dealing with this.
4. Asperger Groups: Here are a few groups of moms/dads who meet to help each other with the many challenges they may face. Find out how to find one of these groups near you.
5. Asperger News: Find a group to help you deal with a new diagnosis. Also get the latest advances on Aspergers and how you can help your loved ones cope.
6. Aspergers: Get support and information on dealing with this syndrome and talk with others who are going through this. Learn ideas to help your youngster or loved one get through the daily issues they may face.
7. Aspergers in Adulthood: If you have been diagnosed as an adult find out how to cope and deal with this on an adult level. Get connected with others dealing with the same issues you are.
8. Aspergers Syndrome: Learn about this condition and what you should know if you have a loved one diagnosed.
9. Aspergers/Autism Debate: One blogger discusses this big debate between the two conditions. Get answers to some of your questions you may have.
10. Aspire Resources: For those who have an adult diagnosed on the autistic spectrum you can find support here. Learn new ways to help your loved one.
11. Autism Society: There are many different support groups around the country to help you deal with autism.
12. Autistic Speaks: Get into life with autism here with one family that has to deal with this disorder. Find out how they live day to day and what they do for support.
13. Baking with My Daughter: Hear how one mom helps her daughter with Aspergers by baking in the kitchen.
14. Best Books: Get reviews on books covering Autism and which are the greatest you can read to help you understand the disorder. You may have someone you love that has been recently diagnosed; these may help you and them learn how to handle certain situations.
15. Kids with Autism: For those moms/dads who have a youngster diagnosed with autism it can be difficult to accept. Stop by here to connect with other moms/dads dealing with this and get tips on how you can help your youngster.
16. Coach for Aspergers: Talk to someone who deals with this on a daily basis and helps other to cope.
17. College Support: For those dealing with Aspergers who are also attending college you will find a great deal of support here. Find help from those who have been there before and those who know how to help you get through.
18. Comments from a Politician: One blogger mommy talks about comments made by Sharon Angle on the new health reform not covering Autism.
19. Cry for Help: One girl asks for help with her boyfriend who may have Aspergers. Learn how to see the signs of dealing with this disorder.
20. Dealing with Aspergers: One mommy blogger shares her trials with an Aspergers youngster. Find out how you can cope and how to connect with others.
21. Farmington Valley: If you are in this area here is a great group to help you. You can talk to others dealing with Aspergers and help each other.
22. Find Support: Having a support system is very important when dealing with autism or Aspergers. Find out here how you can get into a support group and make it through some of the toughest challenges.
23. Get Help: If your youngster is newly diagnosed or if you are just looking for fresh ideas stop by this site to get the help you need.
24. Groups in Illinois: No matter where in this state you are you can find help. Get in with a good support group to help you and your family cope with this diagnosis.
25. Idaho Aspergers: If you are in Idaho you can connect with others dealing with Aspergers here. They have support groups to talk with and informative articles you can read to find out the latest news in dealing with Aspergers.
26. Life with Aspergers: Hear from someone who deals with Aspergers on a daily basis. See the challenges they face and how they get through.
27. Little Bean: One mommy shares an update on her youngster and what he goes through everyday. Find out how they cope and deal with this in their family.
28. Living with Aspergers: Find blogs to help you get through your days with this disorder. Get in touch with how someone dealing with Aspergers handles and understands life around them.
29. Living with My Husband: One woman shares her story of her and her husband who has Aspergers. Find out about their lives and the struggles they face together.
30. MyAspergersChild.com: Google has ranked this site #1 for Aspergers Syndrome and Autistic Spectrum Disorders
31. New Law: One blogger shares their thoughts on the new health care law that congress is trying to pass.
32. On TV: Find out what Aspergers is and when it will be showcased on television. Get tips on how to deal with a loved one facing this.
33. One Mom’s Story: One mom shares her story of her kids with Aspergers. Find out the challenges they face and see if you can understand what they go through.
34. Parenting Blog: Find all kinds of tips and tricks to help your kids cope with this disorder and help them succeed. Get help with school situations and many social situations they may face.
35. Portland Asperger: If you are in the Portland area this may be a group you want to check out. This is one who helps those living with Aspergers and those who have been diagnosed recently.
36. Recognize Kids: Get tips on how you can recognize the signs and symptoms of Aspergers in kids.
37. Religion Asperger Friendly: One blogger shares how you can make religion more friendly to those dealing with Aspergers.
38. Sacramento Area: When you are living in this area you can get help through this group to deal with Aspergers. You can talk to others dealing with this disorder and also find out how to help your family.
39. Seattle Support: Find training, help from others and just support when you need it here. There are many people that are dealing with the same things you are and you can find someone to talk with.
40. Social Mistakes: Learn some of the innocent mistakes those with Aspergers make during social situations. Learn how you can help them get through that and how they can make it through no matter what is going on.
41. Support 4 Hope: Find all the information you need on Aspergers at this site. Get help with a new diagnosis or help understanding what is going on.
42. Support For Parents: Find out new ways to help your youngster progress when dealing with Aspergers.
43. Support Groups: Stop by here to find groups to help you get through dealing with Aspergers syndrome. There are others facing the same challenges you are.
44. Support Network: Find the support you need for autism or Aspergers here. You can talk to people who are dealing with the same things you are and find help in how to handle certain situations.
45. Tips to Help: Get useful tips on how you can work with kids that are dealing with Aspergers. If you are working with them you should stop by here to learn how you can help them succeed.
46. Twin Brothers: Hear from one parent who has twins with this condition. Learn how they handle it and what challenges they are facing each day.
47. Working with Autism: If you are coping with this disorder then you may have a hard time finding the employment you want. Read through this great article to find tips on how to get your dream job.
48. Working with Kids: Here are a few tips to help you if you work with kids that have Aspergers. Find out how you can help them and how you can help the moms/dads.

Coping with the Holidays: Help for Aspergers Children

With Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, I thought we should have a conversation about coping with the holidays – an especially important topic for parents with Aspergers (high functioning autistic) children.

Aspergers kids and teens are easily over-stimulated. Their emotions overwhelm them, and it is up to the people around them to make life easier for them. The holidays are especially difficult for kids who have Aspergers. Remember, they are not social people. Crowds and noise overwhelm them. They do not cope well with the hustle and bustle of holidays, especially Christmas.

Anticipation for a youngster with Aspergers leads to increased levels of anxiety, which he cannot control. He becomes overloaded, and then you have a potential meltdown at the time when you are all supposed to be enjoying the holiday. The celebration can be ruined and everyone may get upset, especially your youngster who is trying so hard to fit-in.

Some Aspergers kids may not want to join in when the family opens presents. He may be checking out the lights on the Christmas tree, trying to figure out how they work, or he may sit in a corner participating in one of his obsessive hobbies. Let him be. If you pressure him to join in, he may become overwhelmed and go into a meltdown. This will only result in upheaval and chaos for the entire family. Allow the Aspergers youngster to check out the lights and open his presents in his own time. The holiday will be much more pleasant for everyone involved.

Aspergers Stressors—

• Being pressured in anyway, such as to be on his best behavior, or to join in the festivities can cause overwhelming emotions in the Aspergers youngster.
• Having too many people around. Crowds and the buzz of conversation can overwhelm the Aspergers youngster.
• Noise. This includes the crinkle of wrapping paper, Christmas carols, singing and dancing Christmas decorations, or anything that causes sound on an ongoing basis.
• Too many visitors at the same time. Remember, the Aspergers youngster does not like to be surrounded by people and noise.

Managing Stress—

Parenting is probably the hardest any of us have ever worked for free – or even for pay. Some days work in the office seems easier. There is more predictability, a distinct focus and a formula for doing things. Plus there is collegiality. Parenting a youngster with Aspergers is often completely the opposite: unpredictable, unfocused, and uncertain. This is especially true during the holiday season.

Here are some suggestions on how both you and your Aspergers child can manage stress:

• Create a sanctuary in one room or part of a room, a place where you put things that make you happy, that comfort you.
• Establish a hobby.
• Even if there is only one activity you can do comfortably with your child, do it when you feel you can and savor whatever moments of connection you experience.
• Exercise. It is no secret that vigorous and REGULAR exercise will alleviate depression and stress and anxiety.
• Find a good therapist.
• Find your little pockets of happiness every day.
• Have a good cry.
• Keep a journal. Writing is very therapeutic. Find one with an attractive cover and write in as often as suits you.
• Make a “date” for coffee and talk therapy with a close friend on a regular basis or as needed.
• Take a bath with lots of bubbles, light scented candles around the tub, and sink in (with a favorite CD playing in the background). If the door has a lock, use it!
• Try something new like yoga or pottery or take up an instrument. Something just for you.
• WALK. This is the easiest, cheapest and most accessible form of stress reduction.

Just as we need to be on the alert for signs of stress in our Aspergers children, we need to stay tuned in to our own feelings as parents. If you find yourself crying, sleeping more or less than usual, having a change in appetite or loss of interest in things that usually bring pleasure, you may be suffering from too much stress. Don’t be hesitant to seek help. A good therapist can be an excellent ally.

How Parents Can Help—

How can you enjoy the season while at the same time keeping your Aspergers youngster calm and behaving appropriately? Here are some tips:

• Allow only one person to open presents at a time. This will alleviate the crinkle of wrapping paper and nose from the excited voices of siblings.

• Ask the youngster to look directly into your eyes when you talk to him. Praise him when he is successful.

• Aspergers kids are often immature. Never tell them to act their age. They have no concept of age-related behavior.

• Be sure the youngster knows what is expected of him. Use simple language that he can understand.

• Encourage the Aspergers youngster to enjoy himself and have fun. If this means he retreat to a quiet area where he can be alone, let him be. This is his way of coping and of enjoying the holiday. Never pressure an Aspergers youngster to play with other kids.

• Explain to your youngster what will be expected of him (e.g., to say ‘hello how are you’ to guests and sit at the table to share the meal). Your youngster will also need to be given permission to leave the festivities, and you can rehearse this together with some simple role play. This is really important as it gives your youngster an exit strategy and allows him to get through the celebrations without going into meltdown.

• Give the Aspergers youngster lots of support, praise and TLC. Let them know that you love them and are there for them, always.

• Have a quiet breakfast on Christmas morning.

• Identify ways to cope with behavior problems. Hugging will help some Aspergers kids, while others don’t like to be touched. Get to know your youngster.

• If you see that your Aspergers child is becoming stressed, you can activate an “exit cue” so he gets out before the situation deteriorates.

• Keep any physical changes to your home to the minimum, so by all means decorate, put up cards and a tree, but just don't make a really big change to the environment. Don’t put out any presents until the day they are to be opened, because your Aspergers youngster will have a hard time keeping his hands off and will became anxious and potentially defiant.

• Keep instructions simple and on a level that the youngster can understand.

• Keep meals quiet. Do not allow toys at the table. Ask each youngster to talk about their favorite toy, including the Aspergers youngster.

• Keep noise minimal. Do not play music for extended periods of time or it will become nothing but noise to the Aspergers youngster.

• Keep visitors minimal. Family members and friends should keep visits short and they should visit at separate times. Be sure everyone knows when they are expected and how long they are expected to stay.

• Learn to identify stress triggers and avoid them when possible.

• Limit choices to keep the youngster from being overwhelmed.

• Prepare your youngster for any changes by calmly telling him the day before what will be happening. Visual supports always work well, so use photos or simple pictures to explain what will be happening.

• Reduce the time talking about the festive occasion. Remember your Aspergers child cannot easily control his emotions and to talk constantly about the event will simply lead to stress and anxiety. It is useful to enlist the help of others in your home and keep any conversations to a minimum when your Aspergers youngster is within ear-shot.

• Sing or whisper words to young kids in order to get their attention and to help them keep focused.

• Teach the youngster stress busting techniques such as deep breathing or counting to ten. Many Aspergers kids find a stress ball beneficial.

• Try to incorporate flexibility into the youngster’s routine at an early age. This allows him to realize and accept that things do change.

• Use social stories to prepare Aspergers kids for new social experiences, the new school year, a move, and any other changes that will take place in their life.

• Warn the youngster well in advance of any changes to be made in his environment, such as moving the furniture or rearranging his room. The youngster’s school must be made aware that moving his desk can cause behavioral problems.

Remember, Aspergers kids are unique. They have their own quirks, distinct personalities, abilities, likes and dislikes. The only difference between them and any other youngster is that they look at the world in a different way. They just need a little extra love, support, understanding and patience from those who love them.

Following these simple steps should lead to a much more positive experience for everyone and will provide your Aspergers youngster with the love, support, and confidence to participate fully in the holidays.

My Aspergers Child: Preventing Meltdowns in Aspergers Children and Teens

Aspergers Teens and "Sex Education"

Question

How should I approach the topic of sexuality with my 13-year-old Aspergers son?

Answer

The subjects of puberty, relationships, and sexuality are major sources of anxiety for teens with Aspergers (high functioning autism). Sexuality is often a tough subject for moms and dads to negotiate, as well. They often take a neutral position with these topics, hoping their kids learn about relationships by example and that the heavier, difficult topics are taught in school health class. While this approach does not always end poorly, it is a recipe for disaster when Aspergers is involved.

Teaching your teenager with Aspergers sexuality and puberty information is crucial. This is not information you want him to learn from his classmates, or worse, by doing his own Internet searches. Mother/fathers of kids with Aspergers should start with the very basics of sexuality, and move on to dating and relationships, since the social ability of a person is so intertwined with their sexuality.

Here are several important points to consider when teaching your youngster with Aspergers sexuality, puberty, and relationship information:

1. Adolescents with Aspergers need sexual education. During puberty, adolescents with Aspergers will develop the desire for sexual interactions. It's important to be explicit about the changes in their body and their emerging feelings. Moms and dads may want to help adolescents feel positive about their changing bodies. However, subtle explanations about sexuality will not register or may be misinterpreted. To help the adolescent understand sexual boundaries, moms and dads or caregivers must give detailed instructions as to what's appropriate depending on the adolescent's age and social abilities. Books or videos that are age appropriate may help the person with Aspergers better understand sexual relationships and behavior.

2. Be frank and straightforward. Speak using easy to understand descriptions and correct terminology.

3. Intimacy can be a struggle. People with this disorder struggle with the back-and-forth nature of intimate relationships. Dating and courtship can be confusing, as they rely on so many subtle or hidden rules and meanings. A teen with Aspergers may find empathy a foreign emotion, causing the other partner to feel isolated and alone. With social skills training and behavior therapy, the skills necessary to achieve an intimate relationship are within reach.

4. Make sure the information you are sharing is age-appropriate. For example, you would be less detailed for a 9-year-old than you would for a 16-year-old.

5. Repetition is necessary when teaching kids with Aspergers. Short sessions repeated over time will work best on any subject.

6. Sensory issues may impact sexuality. Hypersensitivity or under responsiveness are common in adolescents with Aspergers. This can impact their sexual behavior, either reducing the desire to be close or causing them to be overly needy of sex. When it comes to sexual behavior, they may not understand boundaries or limits. Moms and dads may want to use appropriate visual aids to explain touching others inappropriately, keeping their bodies appropriately clothed and touching private parts in public.

7. Sexual relationships challenge adolescents with Aspergers. The subtle cues of dating and sexual relationships may be difficult for adolescents with Aspergers to navigate. The syndrome is commonly known by a lack of social awareness or skills, communication difficulties, obsession with a particular topic or subject and poor coordination. Their social skills may impact the type of sexual relationships they develop. There is very little research into sexual behavior and adolescents with Aspergers. However, most adolescents who suffer with the syndrome show interest in sex. Society's norms on sexuality will not be intuitive to the person with Aspergers. The subtle cues of dating and sexual relationships may be difficult to navigate.

8. Use visual aids, like books and videos to engage your teenager in the conversations.

* A word about Aspergers adults:  Adults with Aspergers may present the sexual behavior of adolescents. Since Aspergers is a developmental delay, adults may experience sexual behavior similar to adolescents. They may be delayed in their social skills, which would manifest in their sexual relationships. These adults need to be made aware through observation or research which sexual behavior is age appropriate. Obsessive behavior is a symptom of Aspergers and may carry over to sexual relations. Also, some medications used to treat symptoms of the syndrome may also impact sexual desire.

On the issue of sexuality, there are two extremes, and you often find Aspergers teens clustered at both. On the one hand, there are the shy, prudish teens who consider it a big deal to unbutton the top button on their shirt or to wear shorts. At the other end, there are teens that think nothing of nudity and aren’t concerned who sees them. Surprisingly, there are also a number of confusing teens who flip back and forth between the two extremes.

Both types of Aspergers teens create social issues with the "prudish" type often being subjected to bullying over their appearance. They also often have problems attending gym class. These Aspergers teens often face longer-term life and relationship issues because social rejection in the teen years can often have lasting consequences. All too often, these teens have major issues with dating and with meeting others. In this regard, some of worst problems stem from their conservative dress sense and the fact that they would never set foot in many of the places where social activities are conducted (e.g., dances).

Not surprisingly though, it's the more "relaxed" types of Aspergers teens who tend to get themselves into the worst trouble. There's no mistaking the problems that girls who are just a little too forthcoming when talking about sexual issues or who flirt inappropriately attract amongst the less controlled members of our society. Male issues tend to be more likely to involve the police, or violence.

Your Aspergers teen’s tendencies will generally start to become obvious from an early age (typically around 5 or 6 years). One parent states, “My children are sent outside fully clothed to play, but frequently when I look out of the window, I see the discarded piles of their clothes on the ground and find them happily jumping around stark-naked on the trampoline where all our neighbors can see them. No amount of correction seems to get the message through. Even worse, they seem to have an unhealthy fascination with their organs and with ‘potty talk’ when their friends have mostly outgrown this.” The big problem with this delay is that it brings the parent uncomfortably close to puberty (a time when such frolicking and talk ceases to be innocent and becomes altogether more dangerous).

Like all teens, Aspergers teens are curious about their bodies and those of others around them. It's fairly normal for some younger kids to show themselves to others ("You show me yours and I'll show you mine"). Unfortunately, this is where the sexual and social delays and fascination with the wrong subjects can cause big problems. It is not uncommon for an Aspergers youngster to remain focused on the "show and tell" stage for much longer than their friends.

The other issue affecting teens with Aspergers is obsession. Aspergers teens are well known for forming fixations on objects, concepts and even people. These obsessions need to be monitored carefully lest they get out of control. It's not at all uncommon for Aspergers teens to develop sex obsessions, even without a partner. Most of these obsessions are perfectly safe behind closed doors, but if they are even discussed openly, there could be social problems (Aspergers teens have a tendency to say just a bit too much).

It's much more critical that “sexuality” gets discussed with Aspergers teens (versus teens that do NOT have Aspergers), because Aspies have more naivety and greater scope for trouble.

What exactly should be discussed?

Here are some ideas to help you, the parent, get started and keep the discussion going:

• Clearly state your feelings about specific issues, such as oral sex and intercourse. Present the risks objectively, including emotional pain, sexually transmitted infections and unplanned pregnancy. Explain that oral sex isn't a risk-free alternative to intercourse.

• If you're uncomfortable, say so — but explain that it's important to keep talking. If you don't know how to answer your adolescent's questions, offer to find the answers or look them up together.

• Don't lecture your Aspergers teenager or rely on scare tactics to discourage sexual activity. Instead, listen carefully. Understand his/her pressures, challenges and concerns.

• Let your Aspergers teenager know that it's OK to talk with you about sex whenever he or she has questions or concerns. Reward questions by saying, "I'm glad you came to me."

• Your Aspergers teenager needs accurate information about sex — but it's just as important to talk about feelings, attitudes and values. Examine questions of ethics and responsibility in the context of your personal or religious beliefs.

• When a TV program or music video raises issues about responsible sexual behavior, use it as a springboard for discussion. Remember that everyday moments — such as riding in the car or putting away groceries — sometimes offer the best opportunities to talk.

Be ready for questions like these:

What if my boyfriend/girlfriend wants to have sex, but I don't? 

Explain that no one should have sex out of a sense of obligation or fear. Any form of forced sex is rape, whether the perpetrator is a stranger or someone your Aspergers teenager has been dating. Impress upon your teenager that “no” always means “no”. Emphasize that alcohol and drugs impair judgment and reduce inhibitions, leading to situations in which date rape is more likely to occur.

What if I think I'm homosexual or bisexual?

Some Aspergers teenagers wonder at some point whether they are gay or bisexual. Help your teenager understand that he or she is just beginning to explore sexual attraction. These feelings may change as time goes on. Above all, however, let your child know that you love him/her unconditionally. Praise your child for sharing his/her feelings.

How will I know I'm ready to have sex?

Various factors — peer pressure, curiosity and loneliness, to name a few — steer some Aspergers teens into early sexual activity. But there's no rush. Remind your child that it's OK to wait. Sex is a “grown-up” behavior. In the meantime, there are many other ways to express affection — intimate talks, long walks, holding hands, listening to music, dancing, kissing, touching and hugging.

If your Aspergers teenager becomes sexually active — whether you think he/she is ready or not — it may be more important than ever to keep the conversation going. State your feelings openly and honestly. Remind your teenager that you expect him/her to take sex and the associated responsibilities seriously.

Stress the importance of safe sex, and make sure your Aspergers teenager understands how to get and use contraception. You might talk about keeping a sexual relationship exclusive, not only as a matter of trust and respect, but also to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections. Also, set and enforce reasonable boundaries (e.g., curfews and rules about visits from friends of the opposite sex.

Your child’s doctor can help, too. A routine checkup can give your Aspergers teenager the opportunity to address sexual activity and other behaviors in a supportive, confidential atmosphere — as well as learn about contraception and safe sex. For females, the doc may also stress the importance of routine HPV vaccination to help prevent genital warts and cervical cancer.

With the parent’s support, your Aspergers teenager can emerge into a sexually responsible adult. Be honest and speak from the heart. If your teenager doesn't seem interested in what you have to say about sex, say it anyway. He/she is probably listening – if not to you, to someone else (who may or may not have good advice).

Do not hesitate to enlist professional help for your teenager with Aspergers. Sexuality can be a stressful, anxiety filled topic. Your teen’s doctor and/or psychologist can help you if you have difficulty. With the right resources and professional assistance, if necessary, you can successfully prepare your teenager with Aspergers for adult relationships.

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

Manipulative Behavior in Children with ASD [level 1]

All folks manipulate others in some way. While this may seem like a character flaw, individuals use manipulation because it works. In fact, moms and dads and educators use manipulation to change behaviors in kids on a daily basis.

Manipulative behaviors can be a positive sign that the youngster is learning how to navigate the social world. At the same time, in some cases, manipulation is misunderstood or confused with frustration. Is a youngster with Aspergers or High-Functioning Autism (HFA) screaming because he is in pain, or because he wants to do something? Misunderstanding manipulation and frustrations is easy to do with this disorder.

Manipulation is sometimes used by the youngster to get what he wants or needs. Every instance of manipulation leads to an underlying legitimate request by the youngster. Yet, it is important to see that manipulation can also lead to behavior that is aggressive or otherwise extreme.

Various forms of manipulation can be seen in Aspergers and HFA kids as follows:

• Confusion Promotion: To manipulate the mother or father, the youngster brings up topics that are related, but not important for the discussion. In this form of manipulation, the goal is to confuse the mother or father to get what they want in a roundabout manner. Moms and dads often learn to ask direct questions to reduce the confusion level and not to give in to frustration over being confused.

• Playing Individuals against Each Other: Aspergers and HFA kids are very smart and this leads to more complex forms of manipulation, such as playing individuals against each other. This situation may result in confusion and frustration. The youngster may end up with what they want simply because of the lack of understanding in the group. This type of situation often happens between siblings or within a group home setting.

• Temper Tantrums: The standard temper tantrum is an example of a type of manipulation found in kids on the autism spectrum. In this situation, the youngster makes a request calmly. It may be unreasonable. When the youngster does not get his way, he may meet this negative response with yelling, destroying things, banging, stomping and even rolling on the floor. Moms and dads who are struggling with kids using temper tantrums learn to ignore them completely, except where the youngster may be injured.

Moms and dads end up frustrated when it comes to being manipulated by their children. You may be unsure of how to stop the poor behavior and get back to having a truthful and open relationship. Solutions often require patience and the ability to see what the underlying, unmet need is.

Here are some suggestions:

• Create an open environment as much as possible. Encourage your youngster to state what they want as directly as possible. Some Aspergers and HFA kids may not be able to communicate effectively.

• Disengage from the behavior occurring, but not the individual. If you feel powerless or unable to manage the situation, direct the individual to someone else.

• In manipulation, moms and dads and teachers may end up feeling powerless. In this situation, overcompensation may occur. A mother or father may become more controlling, for example, which pushes the manipulation farther. When you spot that powerless feeling, stop and assess the underlying circumstances first.

• Remember that the need is not the problem. The problem is the bad behavior and that should be the issue dealt with by the mother or father.

• Simply detach from the power struggle. Stop the process. If it continues, the manipulation will worsen, effectively causing the mother or father to become more controlling. This ends up leading to punishment.

For moms and dads in intense situations where manipulation is occurring readily, it may be helpful to find an support group, either online or locally. Meet with the group and learn strategies for tackling your youngster's particular needs. Some autism experts can also offer information and guidance on handling specific situations.

Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 

==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Launching Adult Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social-Skills and Emotion-Management to Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Parents' Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling the Mystery Behind High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Crucial Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

==> Videos for Parents of Children and Teens with ASD

Understanding Your Aspergers or HFA Child

If your situation is like most parents’ situation, your Aspergers or High-Functioning Autistic (HFA) child’s behavior seems a bit odd at times. Here are a few tips to help you understand what’s going on with him or her:

1. Despite what has been widely written on, kids with Aspergers and HFA do have empathy for others. In fact, more often than not, they are rich with empathy – not devoid of it. More modern literature is starting to reflect this more accurate position. The difference is that the response is different in them.

Kids on the autism spectrum are often very lonely and can become depressed as a result of feeling out of place in the world. Reaching out to a youngster on the spectrum may open more questions for you than provide answers, but a greater effort is likely to yield a greater reward in the long run.

2. If your Aspergers or HFA youngster says ''I need help with ___'', that is what he needs help with, even if it doesn't seem possible. The other side of the coin is if the youngster says ''I am capable of ___'', it is a good idea to trust that.

3. Many kids on the spectrum are very intelligent and may have extraordinary skills that you may or may not understand, but at the same time, your youngster may lack what will seem to you to be common sense.

4. You and your "special needs" youngster do not experience life the same way, so their obstacles, interests, complaints, frustrations are likely to seem illogical to you and to those around you. There are many issues that contribute to the way they view the world around them. There are communication issues, stigma, sensory, 'stereotypical interests', unique responses to social issues, stressors, and additional things than you may be able to imagine.

If you look at it as if they are dodging paint balls all day long every day, paint balls which are invisible to you, it may make a little more sense that they move the way they do, talk the way they do, and make the decisions the way they do.

5. You and your Aspergers or HFA youngster do not think alike. This means that you are likely to misunderstand each other. Knowing this will enable you to do three things:

• When family members, co-workers, friends seem to be having a ''group opinion'' in the negative, you have the insight to be able to say, ''It may appear to be that way, but I think it's a big misunderstanding''.
• When he says or does something that seems hurtful, you can trust that it may not have been intended the way you thought, even if it seems very clear to you.
• When you say or do something that your youngster takes offense to, you can trust that he is misunderstanding you honestly and not trying to be critical.

For moms and dads with children on the autism spectrum, consider this: Maybe it's not only about your youngster's understanding of the world, maybe it's the world's understanding of your youngster.

Aspergers is a neurological disorder, and is one of five diagnoses that comprise what's called “the autism spectrum.” The “autism” label has carried some serious baggage. So much so that in the 1960s there was born a movement of “anti-labelism” where kids were no longer stamped with a diagnosis, and instead their condition was referred to only as “special.”

This trend swung too far in the other direction though. Now it's time to embrace terms like “Aspergers” and “Autism,” so that those with the disorder can begin dealing with exactly what it is that makes them different—both the negatives and the positives.

What can moms and dads with Aspergers and HFA children do to handle stress? Here are some ideas:

1. Joining a support group can be a great way for families to relieve stress. When someone tells you “I understand …I've been there” – nothing feels better at that moment.

2. Make sure you're taken care of. There's a good reason that the airline stewardess instructs passengers to put the oxygen mask on themselves first before assisting their kids. If you can't be there in a healthy, operating way, you're not much good to your youngster.

3. One of the biggest challenges for children with Aspergers and HFA is an ability to shrug off life's failures. But, moms and dads can help their kids to process failure better. Praise, and praise, and praise for trying. Very often moms and dads say, “This is a special youngster, and I want to shield him from failure.” It's a good thought, but it's not the final resting ground. The final resting ground is independence and bravery.

4. Read up on the history of the disorder to find out how the view of it has developed over the years. Depending on the challenges of their particular youngster, moms and dads will feel some sense of pressure to change that youngster—maybe due to an outburst in the supermarket or an awkward conversation with the neighbors. We can all forgive ourselves when want to secede to societal pressure. What's important is this: loving your youngster for who he is.


==> My Aspergers Child: Preventing Meltdowns in Aspergers Children


Anonymous said... Our daughter has been diagnosed for 9 years now and it still helps to read these post! Thanks.Love the support.

Anonymous said... My husband has aspergers and im going through so much stress. I didnt know he had it when we was frist got married. He never knew too. One thing that haed to do everything. It hard when he doesnt understand what he says to me and sometimes he doesnt even remember he even said what he said that hurt me. Im trying to get him into therapy. But he doesnt what to. He need to learn how to communicate with me right and kknow what to do as a husband rule 

The Potential Genius of Aspergers

A famous psychiatrist, Michael Fitzgerald (from Trinity College, Dublin) has claimed that many geniuses in the fields of science, politics and the arts have achieved success because they had Aspergers. He states that many geniuses showed Aspergers traits (e.g., Isaac Newton, Albert Einstein, George Orwell, and H. G. Wells). Fitzgerald argues that the gene linked to Aspergers is the same as those associated with creativity and genius. He compared the characteristics of 1600 Aspergers individuals to some geniuses and found they have many traits in common. Thus, it can be said that some psychiatric disorders may have positive dimensions.

Aspergers individuals can be so successful mainly because they are more focused and persistent, they do not get distracted, and they are not interested in outside society as much as the “average” individual. Many grown-ups with Aspergers have the ability to function effectively in mainstream jobs and live independent lives. Additionally, people with Aspergers may make wonderful intellectual contributions to society in general. Studies suggest an association with achievements in art, music, engineering, computer science, mathematics, physics, and many more.

The deficits related to Aspergers may be debilitating, however, many people experience positive accomplishments, particularly those who are able to succeed in areas less dependent on social interaction, such as mathematics, music and the sciences It is suggested that Aspergers may be an important factor in many valuable contributions to fields and areas that benefit most from the type of thinking and attention to detail that only people with Aspergers can provide.

Aspergers is oftentimes seen as a disorder with both positives and negatives, and several well known grown-ups with Aspergers have achieved success within their career fields. There are several extremely well-known, very successful people who either had, or are believed to have had, Aspergers.

Bill Gates, the Microsoft computer billionaire is supposed to have Aspergers. Some other notable Aspergers-diagnosed people include Nobel Prize-winning economist Vernon Smith, electro pop rocker Gary Numan, and Satoshi Tajiri, the creator of the Pokémon franchise. Colorado State University professor and author Temple Grandin was diagnosed with autism at a young age, and has used her autism to her advantage in her profession as an animal behaviorist specializing in livestock handling.

Some Aspergers investigators hypothesize that well-known figures, such as Thomas Jefferson, Jeremy Bentham, Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Glenn Gould and Ludwig Wittgenstein had Aspergers because they showed some Aspergers-related tendencies or behaviors, such as intense interest in one subject, and/or social problems. These unconfirmed diagnoses, especially posthumous ones, remain controversial, as they work only from biographical information and sometimes ignore documented evidence that would indicate against Aspergers syndrome. Nonetheless it may be argued that it would be a loss to society if Aspergers were cured, as many of these “special” people clearly make a significant contribution to society and their skills are highly prized in many specialist fields.

Lots of people with Aspergers genuinely possess a unique gift and a chance to apply their unique talents to make a genuine contribution to the future, with examples drawn from both the present and further back in time. Additionally, it provides an insight into the kinds of work and careers that may make the best use of their abilities and skills.

The majority of the well-known individuals in the list below are thought to have Aspergers, and several are confirmed cases of Aspergers:

• Abraham Lincoln,1809-1865, US Politician

• Adolf Hitler, 1889-1945 German politician, dictator

• Al Gore, 1948-, former US Vice President and presidential candidate

• Alan Turing, 1912-1954, English mathematician, computer scientist and cryptographer

• Albert Einstein, 1879-1955, German/American theoretical physicist who provided the theory of relativity and was awarded the Nobel Prize in Physics for the work he did with photoelectric effect

• Alexander Graham Bell, 1847-1922, Scottish/Canadian/American inventor of the telephone

• Alexander the Great

• Alfred Hitchcock, 1899-1980, English/American film director

• Andrew Jackson

• Andy Kaufman, 1949-1984, US comedian, subject of the film Man on the Moon

• Andy Warhol, 1928-1987, US artist

• Anton Bruckner , 1824-1896, Austrian composer

• Béla Bartók, 1881-1945, Hungarian composer

• Benjamin Franklin, 1706-1790, US polictician/writer and was considered to be one of the most important of the founding fathers of our country

• Bertrand Russell, 1872-1970, British logician

• Bill Gates, 1955-, US global monopolist

• Bob Dylan, 1941-, US singer-songwriter

• Bobby Fischer, 1943-2008, World Chess Champion

• Carl Jung, 1875-1961, Swiss psychoanalyst

• Catherine the Great

• Charles Dickinson, 1951, US Writer

• Charles Rennie Mackintosh, 1868-1928, Scottish architect and designer

• Charles Schulz, 1922-2000, US cartoonist and creator of Peanuts and Charlie Brown

• Cleopatra

• Crispin Glover, 1964-, US actor

• David Helfgott, 1947-, Australian pianist, subject of the film Shine

• Elvis Presley, 1935-1977, US musician

• Emily Dickinson, 1830-1886, US poet

• Erik Satie, 1866-1925 - Composer

• Franz Kafka, 1883-1924, Czech writer

• Friedrich Nietzsche, 1844-1900, German philosopher

• Garrison Keillor, 1942-, US writer, humorist and host of Prairie Home Companion

• Genie, 1957-?, US "wild child"

• George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950, Irish playwright, writer of Pygmalion, critic and Socialist

• George Washington, 1732-1799, US Politician, the first president of the United States of America

• Glenn Gould, 1932-1982, Canadian pianist

• Gustav Mahler, 1860-1911, Czech/Austrian composer

• H P Lovecraft, 1890-1937, US writer

• Hans Asperger, 1906-1980, Austrian paediatric doctor after whom Asperger's Syndrome is named

• Harry Truman

• Henry Cavendish, 1731-1810, English/French scientist, discovered the composition of air and water

• Henry Ford, 1863-1947, US industrialist

• Henry Thoreau, 1817-1862, US writer

• Howard Hughes, 1905-1976, US billionaire

• Isaac Asimov, 1920-1992, Russian/US writer on science and of science fiction, author of Bicentennial Man

• Isaac Newton, 1642-1727, English mathematician and physicist

• James Garfield

• James Taylor, 1948-, US singer/songwriter

• Jane Austen, 1775-1817, English novelist, author of Pride and Prejudice

• Jeff Greenfield, 1943-, US political analyst/speechwriter, a political wonk

• Jim Henson, 1936-1990, creator of the Muppets, US puppeteer, writer, producer, director, composer

• John Denver, 1943-1997, US musician

• John Motson, 1945-, English sports commentator

• John Nash, 1928-, US mathematician (portrayed by Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind, USA 2001)

• John Quincy Adams, also a president of the country, owned and kept a pet alligator in the East Room of the White House

• Joseph Erber, 1985-, young English composer/musician who has Asperger's Syndrome, subject of a BBC TV documentary

• Kaspar Hauser, c1812-1833, German foundling, portrayed in a film by Werner Herzog

• Keanu Reeves, 1964-, Lebanese/Canadian/US actor

• Keith Olbermann, 1959-, US sportscaster

• Kevin Mitnick, 1963-, US "hacker"

• L S Lowry, 1887-1976, English painter of "matchstick men"

• Leonardo da Vinci, 1452-1519, Italian Painter,Scientist

• Louis IV

• Ludwig II, 1845-1886, King of Bavaria

• Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770-1827, German/Viennese composer

• Ludwig Wittgenstein, 1889-1951, Viennese/English logician and philosopher

• Marilyn Monroe, 1926-1962, US actress

• Mark Twain, 1835-1910, US humorist

• Michael Jackson, 1958-2009, US singer

• Michael Palin, 1943-, English comedian and presenter

• Michelangelo, 1475 1564 - Italian Renissance artist

• Napoleon Bonaparte

• Nikola Tesla, 1856-1943, Serbian/American scientist, engineer, inventor of electric motors

• Oliver Heaviside, 1850-1925, English physicist

• Oliver Sacks, 1933-, UK/US neurologist, author of The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat and Awakenings

• Paul Allen - Another Microsoft "geek", the owner of the Seattle Seahawks & Portland Trailblazers, and the second richest man in the world

• Paul Kostabi 1962-, writer, comedian, artist, producer, technician

• Peter the Great

• Pip Brown "Ladyhawke", 1979-, New Zealand Singer/Songwriter, Musician

• Richard Strauss, 1864-1949, German composer

• Robin Williams, 1951-, US Actor

• Satoshi Tajiri, the creator of Pokémon

• Seth Engstrom, 1987-, Magician and World Champion in Sleight of Hand

• Shakespeare

• Socrates

• Steven Spielberg

• Teddy Roosevelt

• Temple Grandin - She is a designer of humane food animal handling systems, and has been one of the pioneers in Autism and Asperger Awareness

• Thomas Edison, 1847-1931, US inventor

• Thomas Jefferson, 1743-1826, US politician

• Tom Hanks

• Tony Benn, 1925-, English Labour politician

• Vincent Van Gogh, 1853-1890, Dutch painter

• Virginia Woolf, 1882-1941, English Writer

• Wasily Kandinsky, 1866-1944, Russian/French painter

• Wilhem II

• William Taft

• Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, 1756-1791, Austrian composer

• Woody Allen, 1935-, US comedian, actor, writer, director, producer, jazz clarinetist

The Aspergers Comprehensive Handbook

Aspergers and Comorbid Bipolar

Pediatric bipolar Disorder and Aspergers (high functioning autism) are extremely similar in the manner they're treated because their symptoms are similar. But exactly what are these two disorders and how are they related?

Because the symptoms of Aspergers and bipolar disorder can be very similar, it is common for individuals to be clinically determined to have one or the other when they really have both. It is not unusual for the two disorders to occur together, but having comorbid disorders presents even more difficulties in treating and coping with the conditions.

Pediatric bipolar disorder, or better known as manic depression, is an illness that may present as a mood swings or mood cycling. Clients who are suffering from pediatric type one are apt to have episodes of mania with alternating with episodes of melancholy. Clients with pediatric type two experience the thralls of depression with alternating episodes of mania.

Aspergers is linked to autism and is reported to be a mild form of the condition. It's actually a form of pervasive development disorder that triggers development issues particularly where the areas of communication and interpersonal development are concerned.

What are the signs of depression and mania in Bipolar Disorder?

Depression signs consist of: anger, extreme sadness, sleeping too much and feelings of worthlessness. Mania signs are: rage, extreme happiness, increased energy, hyperactivity, distractibility, sleeping too little and obsessive behaviors.

The disorder is brought on by four different factors. They are: neurological, biological, emotional and environmental. Yet not all of these factors can be found in every single case. Since little is recognized about the disorder, advances are still being made in this part.

Bipolar disorder is characterized by strong variations in mood, between intense highs (mania) and lows (depression). Manic states are marked by intense happiness or irritability, racing thoughts, the feeling that you need to do a hundred or so things simultaneously, an inability to focus on anything, bad judgment, increased risk-taking in activities like spending, driving and sex, and insomnia. Depression finds folks feeling miserable for weeks at a time, convinced they are worthless or to blame for everybody's problems. They might have an increase or decrease in appetite or sleep, appear apathetic, and lose interest in things they used to enjoy. Severe depression can lead to suicidal thoughts and attempts. A mixed state combines both manic and depressive elements, with individuals often feeling worthless and sad, but taking risks and otherwise behaving as in a manic state.

What are the signs of Aspergers?

Symptoms of this disease include: social skill problems, repetitive behaviors or odd habits, communication difficulties and limited range of interests.

The causes of Aspergers are not well known but research has shown that it can run in families...meaning it is genetic. So this must imply that the condition is biological...so it is either neurologically interrelated or genetic, right? At current time, there are no answers to this question.

Aspergers is a developmental disability on the autism spectrum. Individuals with Aspergers tend to have one or two highly-focused interests and can talk at length about them, without noticing when others are growing bored or disinterested in the conversation. They're not good at understanding body language or interpreting facial expressions and may speak very formally, as if they're reading from an encyclopedia. It's difficult for them to understand others' emotions or viewpoints. They have a hard time understanding sarcasm or idioms (phrases like "piece of cake" or "hit the road"). They may move awkwardly, with a stiff or clumsy gait. Many individuals with Aspergers have distinct mood swings. The inability to understand what goes on in social situations can lead to frustration and anger, creating behavior issues and outbursts of temper.

What are the similarities between Aspergers and Bipolar Disorder?

Because of its similarities, Aspergers and Pediatric Bipolar Disorder are very similar and can cause a misdiagnosis. The symptoms that are similar are: odd habits, compulsive behavior and spells of rage. Both disorders tend to lack the social development skills as well as the educational, behavioral and anger issues.

Bipolar can be in combination with Aspergers and this is, most often, the case. However, it is not clear if the neurological factors that cause Aspergers are related to the chemical imbalances that are thought to be the cause of pediatric bipolar disorder. As research continues in the area of neurological, technological and psychiatric issues, some answers should be forthcoming about the disease.

It can be difficult to diagnose bipolar disorder or other psychiatric illnesses in someone who has Aspergers. Doctors may attribute their symptoms to the developmental disability and not consider that there could be another, undiagnosed disorder. Because individuals with Aspergers are often less social than people in general, their moodiness may not affect relationships--a key factor in diagnosing bipolar disorder in the general population. Depressive apathy may be seen as the social deficit in Aspergers. What looks like the compulsive need to know everything about a topic of interest, common in individuals with Aspergers, may really be the impulsiveness and compulsive drive of bipolar disorder.

Treatments behind both illnesses—

The treatment options for both conditions are similar; yet there are no prescription drugs for Aspergers but you will find medications to treat the symptoms of it. Considering that the symptoms of Aspergers are very similar to bipolar disorder, prescription drugs used for bipolar may be used for Aspergers.

With both bipolar and Asperger disorders, counseling treatments are used but with the medication. Most of the Aspergers clients don't get medication but counseling is required so clients can learn to cope with their diagnosis.

If you know of a youngster who may be displaying any behaviors mentioned previously, they should be seen by a medical doctor as quickly as possible to be diagnosed. When a diagnosis has been made, a plan for treatment can be developed. Any undiagnosed disorders for both can lead to real trouble for friends, family and the suffering youngster.

Prior to making a diagnosis, your physician must take a comprehensive medical history, including any psychiatric illnesses among members of the family. He will cautiously assess the symptoms, noting the severity and duration of mood swings and other symptoms. In the case of diagnosing kids, the doctor may observe their behavior over the course of several visits to get an accurate measure of their behavior. Thyroid problems can cause symptoms similar to bipolar disorder, so the doctor may order a blood test to rule that out.

There are medications available for treating bipolar disorder in individuals with Aspergers. Individuals taking medications for bipolar should be carefully monitored for side effects. Some antipsychotics commonly prescribed for bipolar disorder can cause involuntary movements in kids; the risk of this is higher in kids with Aspergers. Because of possible communication deficits, it's essential to make careful note of any atypical behavior in individuals with Aspergers who are taking any kind of medication.

Therapy can help you understand the symptoms and learn to manage them. Average to high IQ is one component of Aspergers, so therapy can be quite effective in teaching about the disorders.

The Aspergers Comprehensive Handbook