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Behavior Problems in Aspergers Teens

"Our son with Aspergers (high functioning) recently turned 13. We are noticing an escalation in negative attitude and aggression (mostly verbal). We understand that traditional discipline may backfire with a child with this disorder. So, how can we approach these issues without making a growing problem worse?"

When it comes to Aspergers (high functioning autism) behavior and teenager problems, the teen years are the hardest. That is to say that the teen years are the hardest whether your youngster has Aspergers or not! Raging hormones and frustration with social interactions at school can cause a lot of anger and bad behavior during the teen years.

Your youngster may have the need to:
  • Avoid responsibility (e.g, attending school, obeying parents)
  • Fulfill sensory needs (e.g., relief from heat, cold, or to satisfy thirst)
  • Get something (e.g., his way in a decision, your attention, control over a situation)
  • Manage pain (e.g., physical and/or emotional stress that must be alleviated)

Your Aspergers youngster is unlikely to identify with your feelings or comprehend others' objections to his behavior. The only explanation you should use with him is to specifically state that the objectionable behavior is not permitted. Your son needs to follow rules, and following rules can help to focus and modify his rebellious behavior.

Aspergers Behavior Modification—

Behavior modification is a therapeutic approach that can change your son's behavior. You need to determine the need that his rebellion/aggression fulfills and teach him an acceptable replacement behavior. For example, he can be taught to ask for, point to, or show an emotion card to indicate the need that he is trying to fulfill. (Click here for more information on behavior modification.)

Aspergers Self-Stimulating Behaviors—

Sometimes, self-stimulating behaviors (e.g., pacing, squeezing a stress ball, playing a favorite video game) are taught as replacement behaviors, but it will take time for your son to integrate these behaviors into his daily activities. If your son is severely out of control, he needs to be physically removed from the situation. Granted, this may be easier said than done, and you may need someone to help you. But, behavior modification can be helpful, and it must be started as soon as possible.

Maintaining a Daily Routine—

For kids and adolescents with Aspergers, the importance of maintaining a daily routine cannot be stressed enough. A daily routine produces behavioral stability and psychological comfort for Aspergers kids. Also, it lessens their need to make demands.

When you establish a daily routine, you eliminate some of the situations in which your son's behavior becomes demanding. For example, by building in regular times to give him attention, he may have less need to show aggression to try to get that attention.

Learn to recognize and communicate the causes of his aggression with your youngster—

Ideally over time, your youngster will learn to recognize and communicate the causes of his aggression and get his needs met by using communication. Unfortunately, kids who get their needs met due to aggression or violence are very likely to continue and escalate this oppositional behavior.


==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

Aspergers and Aggressive Behavior

Question

Sometimes my son with Aspergers reminds me of an adult trapped in his little body – mostly when he says to me “mom, I don’t understand what you mean when you say… (whatever I said) … can you please tell me again?” Wow. Unfortunately, I have just today resorted to trying a medication to help control his aggressive behavior because he’s punching his own face and slapping his legs and kicks at adults; leaving bruises on day care teachers. He just doesn’t understand sometimes that you cannot have a banana if there aren’t any. That’s one example of a reason for a blow up. Do you have any advice on how to bring him out of a flying rage?

Answer

Most of us have moments where we have to stop and regroup and try to get our behavior in check. Even the most even-tempered of us can blow up over something seemingly trivial. For children with Asperger’s (high-functioning autism), understanding their own emotions and being able to control them is more than an occasional challenge. It is an everyday struggle.

Online Parent Support, LLC has created a visual model designed to try to eliminate explosive behavior. This model uses a positive approach to behavior that takes away the ability to self-blame or blame others that can complicate those behaviors. The children who are taught using this model begin to learn to stop their behaviors, identify the triggers, and change the direction of the behavior into something more acceptable than a rage.

Using a model such as this can be very effective in helping children with Asperger’s first identify the situation and their feelings and then to help them learn new and acceptable ways of handling the situation. This system of identification and modification has been shown to be an effective way to bring about lasting change.

During this process, try to understand that your child with Asperger’s has a very difficult time understanding the world. He doesn’t understand why he can’t have a banana today when he had one yesterday. As he gets older, he will gain a bit more understanding of these types of situations and he will begin to learn to apply experiences from one circumstance to another. But these are skills he will have to learn.

Try to be patient with your son and try to be firm and consistent with your responses to his behaviors. If you react calmly to his actions and rages, this will help to temper his reactions. Be sure that you talk with him when he is calm about acceptable ways to behave and alternative behaviors to situations he has found himself in. The more you can talk to him about his behavior and his choices, the better chance he has of beginning to make the correct choices more often.

Motivating Students on the Autism Spectrum: Advice for Teachers


Unfortunately, there is no single magical formula for motivating Aspergers and high-functioning autistic (HFA students. Many factors affect a given student's motivation to work and to learn: interest in the subject matter, perception of its usefulness, general desire to achieve, self-confidence and self-esteem, as well as patience and persistence. And, of course, not all students on the autism spectrum are motivated by the same values, needs, desires, or wants. Some children will be motivated by the approval of others, some by overcoming challenges.

To encourage Aspergers and HFA students to become self-motivated independent learners, teachers can do the following:
  • Create an atmosphere that is open and positive.
  • Ensure opportunities for students' success by assigning tasks that are neither too easy nor too difficult.
  • Give frequent, early, positive feedback that supports students' beliefs that they can do well.
  • Help children feel that they are valued members of a learning community.
  • Help children find personal meaning and value in the material.

Most students on the spectrum respond positively to a well-organized course taught by an enthusiastic teacher who has a genuine interest in "special needs" children and what they learn. Thus, activities you undertake to promote learning will also enhance students' motivation.

Ask these students to analyze what makes their classes more or less "motivating." Sass asks his classes to recall two recent class periods, one in which they were highly motivated and one in which their motivation was low. Each student makes a list of specific aspects of the two classes that influenced his or her level of motivation, and children then meet in small groups to reach consensus on characteristics that contribute to high and low motivation. In over twenty courses, Sass reports, the same eight characteristics emerge as major contributors to student motivation:
  • Active involvement of students
  • Appropriate difficulty level of the material
  • Teacher's enthusiasm
  • Organization of the course
  • Rapport between teacher and students
  • Relevance of the material
  • Use of appropriate, concrete, and understandable examples
  • Variety

Capitalize on the students' existing needs. Children learn best when incentives for learning in a classroom satisfy their own motives for enrolling in the course. Some of the needs children may bring to the classroom are the need to learn something in order to complete a particular task or activity, the need to seek new experiences, the need to perfect skills, the need to overcome challenges, the need to become competent, the need to succeed and do well, the need to feel involved and to interact with other people. Satisfying such needs is rewarding in itself, and such rewards sustain learning more effectively than do grades. Design assignments, in-class activities, and discussion questions to address these kinds of needs.

Make Aspergers and HFA students active participants in learning. Children learn by doing, making, writing, designing, creating, solving. Passivity dampens students' motivation and curiosity. Pose questions. Don't tell children something when you can ask them. Encourage children to suggest approaches to a problem or to guess the results of an experiment. Use small group work.

Hold high but realistic expectations for Aspergers and HFA students. Research has shown that a teacher's expectations have a powerful effect on a student's performance. If you act as though you expect children to be motivated, hardworking, and interested in the course, they are more likely to be so. Set realistic expectations for children when you make assignments, give presentations, conduct discussions, and grade examinations. "Realistic" in this context means that your standards are high enough to motivate children to do their best work but not so high that students will inevitably be frustrated in trying to meet those expectations. To develop the drive to achieve, students need to believe that achievement is possible -which means that you need to provide early opportunities for success.

Avoid creating intense competition among students on the spectrum. Competition produces anxiety, which can interfere with learning. Reduce students' tendencies to compare themselves to one another. Bligh reports that children are more attentive, display better comprehension, produce more work, and are more favorable to the teaching method when they work cooperatively in groups rather than compete as individuals. Refrain from public criticisms of students' performance and from comments or activities that pit children against each other.

Be enthusiastic about your subject. A teacher's enthusiasm is a crucial factor in student motivation. If you become bored or apathetic, Aspergers and HFA students will too. Typically, a teacher's enthusiasm comes from confidence, excitement about the content and genuine pleasure in teaching. If you find yourself uninterested in the material, think back to what attracted you to the field and bring those aspects of the subject matter to life for children. Or challenge yourself to devise the most exciting way to present the material, however dull the material itself may seem to you.

Help these young people set achievable goals for themselves. Failure to attain unrealistic goals can disappoint and frustrate children. Encourage children to focus on their continued improvement, not just on their grade on any one test or assignment. Help students evaluate their progress by encouraging them to critique their own work, analyze their strengths, and work on their weaknesses. For example, consider asking children to submit self-evaluation forms with one or two assignments.

Strengthen these students' self-motivation. Avoid messages that reinforce your power as a teacher or that emphasizes extrinsic rewards. Instead of saying, "I require," "you must," or "you should," stress "I think you will find. . . " or "I will be interested in your reaction."

Tell these students what they need to do to succeed in your course. Don't let children struggle to figure out what is expected of them. Reassure students that they can do well in your course, and tell them exactly what they must do to succeed. Say something to the effect that "If you can handle the examples on these problem sheets, you can pass the exam. People who have trouble with these examples can ask me for extra help." Or instead of saying, "You're way behind," tell the student, "Here is one way you could go about learning the material. How can I help you?"

Increase the difficulty of the material as the semester progresses. Give Aspergers students opportunities to succeed at the beginning of the semester. Once children feel they can succeed, you can gradually increase the difficulty level. If assignments and exams include easier and harder questions, every student will have a chance to experience success as well as challenge.

Vary your teaching methods. Variety reawakens students' involvement in the course and their motivation. Break the routine by incorporating a variety of teaching activities and methods in your course: role playing, debates, brainstorming, discussion, demonstrations, case studies, audiovisual presentations, guest speakers, or small group work.

When possible, let Aspergers and HFA students have some say in choosing what will be studied. Give children options on term papers or other assignments (but not on tests). Let children decide between two locations for the field trip, or have them select which topics to explore in greater depth. If possible, include optional or alternative units in the course.

Work from students' strengths and interests. Find out why children are enrolled in your course, how they feel about the subject matter, and what their expectations are. Then try to devise examples, case studies, or assignments that relate the course content to students' interests and experiences. For instance, a chemistry professor might devote some lecture time to examining the contributions of chemistry to resolving environmental problems. Explain how the content and objectives of your course will help children achieve their educational, professional, or personal goals.

Avoid using grades as threats. The threat of low grades may prompt some "special needs" students to work hard, but other children may resort to academic dishonesty, excuses for late work, and other counterproductive behavior.

Design tests that encourage the kind of learning you want these students to achieve. Many children will learn whatever is necessary to get the grades they desire. If you base your tests on memorizing details, children will focus on memorizing facts. If your tests stress the synthesis and evaluation of information, students will be motivated to practice those skills when they study.

Emphasize mastery and learning rather than grades. Ames and Ames report on two secondary school math teachers. One teacher graded every homework assignment and counted homework as 30 percent of a student's final grade. The second teacher told children to spend a fixed amount of time on their homework (thirty minutes a night) and to bring questions to class about problems they could not complete. This teacher graded homework as satisfactory or unsatisfactory, gave children the opportunity to redo their assignments, and counted homework as 10 percent of the final grade. Although homework was a smaller part of the course grade, this second teacher was more successful in motivating children to turn in their homework.

In the first class, some students gave up rather than risk low evaluations of their abilities. In the second class, children were not risking their self-worth each time they did their homework but rather were attempting to learn. Mistakes were viewed as acceptable and something to learn from. Researchers recommend de-emphasizing grading by eliminating complex systems of credit points; they also advise against trying to use grades to control nonacademic behavior (for example, lowering grades for missed classes). Instead, assign ungraded written work, stress the personal satisfaction of doing assignments, and help students measure their progress.

Give Aspergers students feedback as quickly as possible. Return tests and papers promptly, and reward success publicly and immediately. Give Aspergers students some indication of how well they have done and how to improve. Rewards can be as simple as saying a student's response was good, with an indication of why it was good, or mentioning the names of contributors: "Cherry's point about pollution really synthesized the ideas we had been discussing."

Reward success. Both positive and negative comments influence motivation, but research consistently indicates that Aspergers and HFA students are more affected by positive feedback and success. Praise builds students' self-confidence, competence, and self-esteem. Recognize sincere efforts even if the product is less than stellar. If a student's performance is weak, let the student know that you believe he or she can improve and succeed over time.

Introduce Aspergers and HFA students to the good work done by their peers. Share the ideas, knowledge, and accomplishments of individual students with the class as a whole:
  • Have children write a brief critique of a classmate's paper.
  • Make available copies of the best papers and essay exams.
  • Pass out a list of research topics chosen by children so they will know whether others are writing papers of interest to them.
  • Provide class time for children to read papers or assignments submitted by classmates.
  • Schedule a brief talk by a student who has experience or who is doing a research paper on a topic relevant to your lecture.

Be specific when giving negative feedback. Negative feedback is very powerful and can lead to a negative class atmosphere. Whenever you identify a student's weakness, make it clear that your comments relate to a particular task or performance, not to the student as a person. Try to cushion negative comments with a compliment about aspects of the task in which the student succeeded.

Avoid demeaning comments. Many Aspergers and HFA students in your class may be anxious about their performance and abilities. Be sensitive to how you phrase your comments and avoid offhand remarks that might prick their feelings of inadequacy.

Avoid giving in to these students' pleas for "the answer" to homework problems. When you simply give struggling students the solution, you rob them of the chance to think for themselves. Use a more productive approach:
  • Resist answering the question "is this right?" Suggest to the children a way to check the answer for themselves.
  • Praise the children for small, independent steps.
  • Gently brush aside students’ anxiety about not getting the answer by refocusing their attention on the problem at hand.
  • Ask the children to build on what they do know about the problem.
  • Ask the children for one possible approach to the problem.

If you follow these steps, students with special needs will learn that it is all right not to have an instant answer. They will also learn to develop greater patience and to work at their own pace. And by working through the problem, children will experience a sense of achievement and confidence that will increase their motivation to learn.

Ask nonthreatening questions about the reading. Initially pose general questions that do not create tension or feelings of resistance: "Can you give me one or two items from the chapter that seems important?" "What section of the reading do you think we should review?" "What item in the reading surprised you?" "What topics in the chapter can you apply to your own experience?"

Ask these students to write a one-word journal or one-word sentence. Angelo describes the one-word journal as follows: children are asked to choose a single word that best summarizes the reading and then write a page or less explaining or justifying their word choice. This assignment can then be used as a basis for class discussion.

Assign study questions. Hand out study questions that alert these students to the key points of the reading assignment. To provide extra incentive for children, tell them you will base exam questions on the study questions.

Assign the reading at least two sessions before it will be discussed. Give Aspergers and HFA students ample time to prepare and try to pique their curiosity about the reading: "This article is one of my favorites, and I'll be interested to see what you think about it."

Give a written assignment to those students who have not done the reading. Some teachers ask at the beginning of the class who has completed the reading. Children who have not read the material are given a written assignment and dismissed. Those who have read the material stay and participate in class discussion. The written assignment is not graded but merely acknowledged. This technique should not be used more than once a term.

If your class is small, have children turn in brief notes on the day's reading that they can use during exams. At the start of each class, a professor in the physical sciences asks children to submit a 3" x 5" card with an outline, definitions, key ideas, or other material from the day's assigned reading. After class, he checks the cards and stamps them with his name. He returns the cards to children at a class session prior to the midterm. Aspergers and HFA students can then add any material they would like to the cards but cannot submit additional cards. The cards are again returned to the faculty member who distributes them to children during the test. This faculty member reports that the number of children completing the reading jumped from 10 percent to 90 percent and that students especially valued these "survival cards."

Prepare an exam question on un-discussed readings. One faculty member asks her class whether they have done the reading. If the answer is no, she says, "You'll have to read the material on your own. Expect a question on the next exam covering the reading." The next time she assigns reading, she reminds the class of what happened the last time, and the children come to class prepared.

Use class time as a reading period. If you are trying to lead a discussion and find that few Aspergers or HFA students have completed the reading assignment, consider asking children to read the material for the remainder of class time. Have them read silently or call on students to read aloud and discuss the key points. Make it clear to students that you are reluctantly taking this unusual step because they have not completed the assignment.

More resources for parents and teachers of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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Do you need the advice of a professional who specializes in parenting children and teens with Autism Spectrum Disorders?  Sign-up for Online Parent Coaching today.


References—

American Psychological Association. Learner-Centered Psychological Principles: Guidelines for School Redesign and Reform. Washington, D.C.: American Psychological Association, 1992.
Ames, R., and Ames, C. "Motivation and Effective Teaching." In B. F. Jones and L. Idol (eds.), Dimensions of Thinking and Cognitive Instruction. Hillsdale, N. J.: ErIbaum, 1990.
Angelo, T. A. "Ten Easy Pieces: Assessing Higher Learning in Four Dimensions." In T. A. Angelo (ed.), Classroom Research: Early Lessons from Success. New Directions for Teaching and Learning, no. 46. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1991.
Bligh, D. A. What's the Use of Lecturing? Devon, England: Teaching Services Centre, University of Exeter, 1971.
Brock, S. C. Practitioners' Views on Teaching the Large Introductory College Course. Manhattan: Center for Faculty Evaluation and Development, Kansas State University, 1976.
Cashin, W. E. "Motivating Students." Idea Paper, no. 1. Manhattan: Center for Faculty Evaluation and Development in Higher Education, Kansas State University, 1979.
Daniel, J. W. "Survival Cards in Math." College Teaching, 1988, 36(3), 110.
Eble, K. E. The Craft of Teaching. (2nd ed.) San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1988.
Ericksen, S. C. "The Lecture." Memo to the Faculty, no. 60. Ann Arbor: Center for Research on Teaching and Learning, University of Michigan, 1978.
Erickson, B. L., and Strommer, D. W. Teaching College Freshmen. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1991.
Fiore, N. "On Not Doing a Student's Homework." Chemistry TA Handbook. Berkeley: Chemistry Department, University of California, 1985.
Forsyth, D. R., and McMillan, J. H. "Practical Proposals for Motivating Students." In R. J. Menges and M. D. Svinicki (eds.), College Teaching: From Theory to Practice. New Directions in Teaching and Learning, no. 45. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1991.
Lowman, J. Mastering the Techniques of Teaching. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1984.
Lowman, J. "Promoting Motivation and Learning." College Teaching, 1990, 38(4), 136-39.
Lucas, A. F. "Using Psychological Models to Understand Student Motivation." In M. D. Svinicki (ed.), The Changing Face of College Teaching. New Directions for Teaching and Learning, no. 42. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1990.
McKeachie, W. J. Teaching Tips. (8th ed.) Lexington, Mass.: Heath, 1986.
McMillan, J. H., and Forsyth, D. R. "What Theories of Motivation Say About Why Learners Learn." In R. J. Menges and M. D. Svinicki (eds.), College Teaching: From Theory to Practice. New Directions for Teaching and Learning, no. 45. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1991.
Sass, E. J. "Motivation in the College Classroom: What Students Tell Us." Teaching of Psychology, 1989, 16(2), 86-88.
Tiberius, R. G. Small Group Teaching: A Trouble-Shooting Guide. Toronto: Ontario Institute for Studies in Education Press, 1990.
Weinert, F. E., and Kluwe, R. H. Metacognition, Motivation and Understanding. Hillsdale, N.J.: Erlbaum, 1987.
"When They Don't Do the Reading." Teaching Professor, 1989, 3(10), 3-4.

Equine Therapy for Aspergers Children

"We have heard that therapy using animals is an effective method for treating symptoms of AS. Is there one animal therapy that stands out above the rest, or one that is recommended more often?"

Typical treatment programs for Aspergers (high-functioning autism) focus on behavior modification and improvement. The complexity of the behaviors is gradually increased in an attempt to help the person continue developing. Medication is sometimes prescribed to people with Aspergers, but only to control symptoms like hyperactivity or seizures. There's currently no known cure for Aspergers.

Research into animal assisted therapy is fairly new. However, even among professionals who believe more research is in order, there's a general consensus that therapy animals can be a highly beneficial addition to treatment programs for kids with Aspergers.

Equine assisted therapy seems to have the best results. The rhythmic motion of riding a horse causes the kids to focus on the movement - which is slow, deliberate, and relaxing. The youngster indirectly learns how to focus better, which is aided by the calming effect of riding. Some equine therapy ranches have a policy of letting the horse pick the youngster, rather than "assigning" the youngster and horse to each other. It's a unique method that has had excellent results. A staff person will lead a youngster to a horse, and watch for the horse's reaction. If the horse dips his head or nuzzles the youngster, it's an indication that a bond is being formed and the youngster has been "chosen".

In addition to the movement experienced when riding the horse, tactile senses are stimulated. The horse's skin is fuzzy, the mane and tail are rough, and the nose is soft. Discovery of these sensations often helps draw a youngster out, stimulating development of his or her verbal communication and interest in other physical objects.

Motor skills are also developed as the youngster learns to ride, and eventually groom and tack. Equine therapy offers a safe, secure environment where a therapist or other staff person will be close at hand as new skills are learned. These new skills, and the youngster's continued improvement upon them, increase her self-confidence, which increases her desire and willingness to learn skills at home and/or at school. Learning is no longer scary, but fun, interesting and rewarding.

A youngster's ability to interact socially is often improved as well. The therapy sessions teach the youngster how to interact with the counselor and staff people. Group sessions allow the youngster to work and play with other kids and counselors, to learn how to handle relational conflict, and how to help others. Counselors who have consistently included equine assisted therapy in their development programs for autistic kids always have stories to tell of the dramatic improvements they see in the kids. Not only is basic communication and motor skills improved, but many kids experience improvements in their overall moods. Kids who before experienced angry outbursts or who rarely smiled are suddenly calmer, and smile more readily and frequently.

As with other types of animal assisted therapy, the introduction of the animal seems to calm and soothe kids. The playful nature of animals seems to draw autistic kids out of their "shells". Kids who start to isolate themselves have become more open as a result of equine assisted therapy. Often, they begin making eye contact with the animal first, then with other people. Soon after that, the youngster often becomes more relationally open; again, with the animal first, then with people.

Working with an animal such as a horse offers the youngster with Aspergers a safe, non-judgmental and tolerant relationship in which to practice both verbal and non-verbal communication skills. Communication is power when a command such as "Giddyup!" or "Giddup!" makes the horse go and "Whoa!" or "Ho!" makes it stop.

The Aspergers youngster can also learn to recognize the impact of his own behavior on others while working with a horse. If he yells at a horse, the animal won't come near him. If he speaks gently, it will.

During equine therapy, a licensed mental health professional will use the structured activity, whether feeding, grooming, haltering or even riding the horse to help the youngster to meet specific goals. The youngster may be asked to interpret how the animal is feeling by observing non-verbal cues, or to practice taking turns talking and listening while having a conversation with the therapist about the activity. He may join a group of other kids at the stable to discuss various aspects of horsemanship, practicing communication skills and age-appropriate topics of conversation.

In a challenging world, the Aspergers kid with horsemanship skills will have new (and age-appropriate) topics of conversation, new communication and social skills to apply to human relationships, and of course, a new friend in a therapy horse.


Speech Therapy for Aspergers Children?

Many moms and dads of extremely verbal kids with Aspergers (high-functioning autism) are surprised when it is suggested that Speech Therapy may help their youngster with communication difficulties. The difficulties are not in how the youngster speaks or pronounces words, but rather in how the youngster perceives the meaning of other people's speech and how they respond to it.

There are many expressions we use that are confusing to a youngster with Aspergers. Until you listen closely to the kinds of questions your youngster asks about what other people say, this problem is an easy one to miss.

Here's an example reported by one parent:

The other night my husband was holding a wooden bowl in his hands. Our younger son said "Can I see that?" and put out his hands to hold it. Our older son with Aspergers immediately asked "Why do people always say what they don't mean?" This had us puzzled until we dug a little deeper and found out the reason for his confusion. My son stated, "Why do people say ‘can I see that’ when they really mean ‘can I hold that’?" There was no way in which my husband and I could explain to our son why people say something that isn't what they mean to our son's satisfaction. I suspect that this problem occurs daily in my son's life, contributing to his stress and anxiety in dealing with the school environment.

Speech therapy can assist this youngster with the understanding of what other people mean when they speak and do something completely different. Social skills can be incorporated into the speech therapy as well. 

The parent went on to say:

When I brought up speech therapy for my son, who is 12 and extremely verbal, at a recent school meeting, there were some rather skeptical looks pointed my way until I explained the theory that speech therapy is one way of helping kids with Aspergers extract the meaning of other people's speech. Using the incidence of the wooden bowl as an example of the difficulty my son has, the teachers understood and are now incorporating this into my son's IEP.

One of the main differences between a youngster with Aspergers and those with one of the other autism spectrum disorders is a lack of a clinically significant language delay. Per the DSM, if there is a clinically-significant language delay present (i.e., lack of communicative phrases by 3 years of age), then a diagnosis of Aspergers cannot be made. However, speech-language pathologists can assist kids with Aspergers in a variety of ways.

Social Skills Group—

One of the hallmark signs of an autism spectrum disorder, including Aspergers, is a lack of age-appropriate social skills. This may manifest in several ways including a lack of eye contact, the inability to merge into a group of peers or simply the lack of desire to participate in reciprocal communication.

Some social skills groups are facilitated by speech-language pathologists (SLP). The SLP, who understands the nuances of language and knowing that language is one of the main methods of communication, assists kids with Aspergers with acquiring social skills. Social skills in typically developing kids emerge as the youngster ages. In kids with Aspergers, these skills often have to be taught just as math facts are taught.

Pragmatic Language Instruction—

Pragmatic communication involves the use of language, changing the language based on a situation and following the basic rules of conversation. Some kids with Aspergers can be verbally gifted, yet it is not uncommon to find pragmatic language concerns in these kids.

Pragmatic language is basically the social use of language. Kids with Aspergers who also have pragmatic deficiencies may not understand how to take turns when engaged in a conversation with another youngster or even an adult. Other pragmatic language concerns include standing too close to a person while talking, coordinating facial expressions and eye contact in conversation and even understanding how to speak differently to a young youngster as opposed to an adult. SLPs can work with kids with Aspergers to help them understand the rules of social language.

Speech Articulation Concerns—

Some kids with Aspergers may present with speech articulation errors. This can be a result of low oral-motor muscle tone or perhaps a problem with the motor coordination required to make certain speech sounds. When a youngster with Aspergers doesn’t grow out of typical speech articulation errors, working with an SLP may help reduce these errors. As a result, the youngster is better understood by peers and adults which could possibly decrease social anxieties that the youngster has as a result of his articulation.

Speech therapy is a fixture among those with an autism spectrum disorder, including Aspergers. If you have a youngster with Aspergers and are concerned with one of the above issues, consider contacting your school’s SLP to request an assessment.


Helping Aspergers Students Deal with Anger: Advice for Teachers

Aspergers (high functioning autistic) kid’s anger presents challenges to educators committed to constructive, ethical, and effective youngster guidance. This post explores what we know about the components of Aspergers kid’s anger, factors contributing to understanding and managing anger, and the ways educators can guide kid’s expressions of anger.

Three Components of Anger—

Anger is believed to have three components (Lewis & Michalson, 1983):

The Emotional State of Anger. The first component is the emotion itself, defined as an affective or arousal state, or a feeling experienced when a goal is blocked or needs are frustrated. Fabes and Eisenberg (1992) describe several types of stress-producing anger provocations that young kids face daily in classroom interactions:
  • Conflict over possessions, which involves someone taking kid’s property or invading their space.
  • Issues of compliance, which often involve asking or insisting that kids do something that they do not want to do--for instance, wash their hands.
  • Physical assault, which involves one youngster doing something to another youngster, such as pushing or hitting.
  • Rejection, which involves a youngster being ignored or not allowed to play with peers.
  • Verbal conflict, for example, a tease or a taunt.

Expression of Anger—

The second component of anger is its expression. Some kids vent or express anger through facial expressions, crying, sulking, or talking, but do little to try to solve a problem or confront the provocateur. Others actively resist by physically or verbally defending their positions, self-esteem, or possessions in non-aggressive ways. Still other kids express anger with aggressive revenge by physically or verbally retaliating against the provocateur. Some kids express dislike by telling the offender that he or she cannot play or is not liked. Other kids express anger through avoidance or attempts to escape from or evade the provocateur. And some kids use adult seeking, looking for comfort or solutions from a teacher, or telling the teacher about an incident.

Educators can use youngster guidance strategies to help Aspergers students express angry feelings in socially constructive ways. Kids develop ideas about how to express emotions (Michalson & Lewis, 1985; Russel, 1989) primarily through social interaction in their families and later by watching television or movies, playing video games, and reading books (Honig & Wittmer, 1992). Some Aspergers students have learned a negative, aggressive approach to expressing anger (Cummings, 1987; Hennessy et al., 1994) and, when confronted with everyday anger conflicts, resort to using aggression in the classroom (Huesmann, 1988). A major challenge for early childhood educators is to encourage Aspergers students to acknowledge angry feelings and to help them learn to express anger in positive and effective ways.

An Understanding of Anger—

The third component of the anger experience is understanding - interpreting and evaluating - the emotion. Because the ability to regulate the expression of anger is linked to an understanding of the emotion (Zeman & Shipman, 1996), and because kid’s ability to reflect on their anger is somewhat limited, Aspergers students need guidance from educators and parents in understanding and managing their feelings of anger.

Understanding and Managing Anger—

The development of basic cognitive processes undergirds kid’s gradual development of the understanding of anger (Lewis & Saarni, 1985).

Self-Referential and Self-Regulatory Behaviors—Self-referential behaviors include viewing the self as separate from others and as an active, independent, causal agent. Self-regulation refers to controlling impulses, tolerating frustration, and postponing immediate gratification. Initial self-regulation in young kids provides a base for early childhood educators who can develop strategies to nurture kid’s emerging ability to regulate the expression of anger.

Memory—Memory improves substantially during early childhood (Perlmutter, 1986), enabling young kids to better remember aspects of anger-arousing interactions. Aspergers students who have developed unhelpful ideas of how to express anger (Miller & Sperry, 1987) may retrieve the early unhelpful strategy even after educators help them gain a more helpful perspective. This finding implies that educators may have to remind some Aspergers students, sometimes more than once or twice, about the less aggressive ways of expressing anger.

Language—Talking about emotions helps young Aspergers students understand their feelings (Brown & Dunn, 1996). The understanding of emotion in preschool kids is predicted by overall language ability (Denham, Zoller, & Couchoud, 1994). Educators can expect individual differences in the ability to identify and label angry feelings because kid’s families model a variety of approaches in talking about emotions.

Guiding Kid’s Expressions of Anger—

Educators can help Aspergers students deal with anger by guiding their understanding and management of this emotion. The practices described here can help Aspergers students understand and manage angry feelings in a direct and non-aggressive way.

Communicate with Moms and Dads—Some of the same strategies employed to talk with moms and dads about other areas of the curriculum can be used to enlist their assistance in helping Aspergers students learn to express emotions. For example, articles about learning to use words to label anger can be included in a newsletter to moms and dads.

Create a Safe Emotional Climate—A healthy early childhood setting permits kids to acknowledge all feelings, pleasant and unpleasant, and does not shame anger. Healthy classroom systems have clear, firm, and flexible boundaries.

Encourage Kids to Label Feelings of Anger—Educators and parents can help young Aspergers students produce a label for their anger by teaching them that they are having a feeling and that they can use a word to describe their angry feeling. A permanent record (a book or chart) can be made of lists of labels for anger (e.g., mad, irritated, annoyed), and the class can refer to it when discussing angry feelings.

Encourage Kids to Talk About Anger-Arousing Interactions—Preschool kids better understand anger and other emotions when adults explain emotions (Denham, Zoller, &Couchoud, 1994). When Aspergers students are embroiled in an anger-arousing interaction, educators can help by listening without judging, evaluating, or ordering them to feel differently.

Help Kids Develop Self-Regulatory Skills—Educators of infants and toddlers do a lot of self-regulation "work," realizing that the Aspergers students in their care have a very limited ability to regulate their own emotions. As Aspergers students get older, adults can gradually transfer control of the self to kids, so that they can develop self-regulatory skills.

Model Responsible Anger Management—Aspergers students have an impaired ability to understand emotion when adults show a lot of anger (Denham, Zoller, & Couchoud, 1994). Adults who are most effective in helping Aspergers students manage anger model responsible management by acknowledging, accepting, and taking responsibility for their own angry feelings and by expressing anger in direct and non-aggressive ways.

Use Books and Stories about Anger to Help Kids Understand and Manage Anger—Well-presented stories about anger and other emotions validate kid’s feelings and give information about anger (Jalongo, 1986; Marion, 1995). It is important to preview all books about anger because some stories teach irresponsible anger management.

Aspergers students guided toward responsible anger management are more likely to understand and manage angry feelings directly and non aggressively and to avoid the stress often accompanying poor anger management (Eisenberg et al., 1991). Educators can take some of the bumps out of understanding and managing anger by adopting positive guidance strategies.


More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book


==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

He loses his temper frequently...

Question

My son is 10 years old and awaiting an Aspergers diagnosis. He frequently misinterprets the actions of others and becomes quite angry. He loses his temper frequently. How can we help him?

Answer

Your son is experiencing a great deal of stress due to the symptoms of Asperger’s (high-functioning autism).

Some kids react by becoming depressed, some become anxious, and others become angry and experience rage against the frustrating events that occur in their day.

Some kids externalize their feelings and blame others, while some internalize their feelings and have a difficult time controlling their anger.

Their may be no particular event to his anger – just an aggressive mood or reaction to a frustrating experience.

Encourage self-control and teach your child to consider alternative behaviors.

Self-control can be strengthened by teaching your child to stop and count to ten, taking a deep breath and reminding themselves to keep calm.

Or for some children it is helpful that they have an agreed room or particular space that they take themselves too when they feel that they are getting anxious/angry.

Specific relaxation techniques can be practiced and your child can be taught the cues when they must calm down and relax. Explain the alternative to your child and in specific terms.

There are three stages to help your child when he/she is losing his temper:

1. Make a list of signals – Construct a list of the signals that indicate the person is becoming increasingly stressed (e.g. rocking, reddened face, pacing, shouting etc.).

2. Draw attention to the signals – Once these sign are recognized, the person’s attention must be drawn to their actions and behavior. The angry individual is usually the last to recognize the change in their behavior.

3. Find calming alternatives – Then construct a list of activities which will calm them and encourage them to participate in those behaviors.

Keep in mind that your son will most likely have difficulty expressing what is making him angry.

You will need to assess the situation to determine what may be provoking him.

Another alternative is to keep him engaged in activities that burn off energy and reduce his need to express the anger that he is feeling.

ASD: Difficulty Identifying and Interpreting Emotional Signals in Others

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a complex neurodevelopmental condition that affects an individual's ability to communicate, interact w...