Helping Children On The Autism Spectrum Who Have Difficulty Picking Up On Social Cues

Question

Our 10-year-old son is diagnosed with high functioning autism. He is bright and inquisitive, but has great difficulty picking up on social cues and understanding many aspects of friendship. We struggle to coach him in these areas ...our explanations often don’t make sense to him. Any suggestions?

Answer

High-Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger's presents kids with a variety of social and emotional stumbling blocks. Due to difficulties understanding implied meaning, humor, and other inferential reasoning skills, these young people are often confused by the rapidly changing landscape of social interaction.

Their tendency toward quick and literal interpretation of words can produce significant problems with establishing and maintaining friendships. Preoccupations with narrow, solitary interests can impede their capacity to converse on the range of topics that typically interest peers.

Moms and dads of kids on the autism spectrum often help them make sense of their social world, but success can be fleeting and isolated to certain circumstances.

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

Here are some coaching tips that may increase the success rate:

 Road Maps--

Think of the social world as a variety of “relationship road maps” that your youngster needs to perceive accurately and use talking tools to be able to follow. On various pieces of paper, draw “roads” of how conversations flow depending upon environmental cues. Cues include who your youngster is with, where it takes place, what the other youngster says and the degree of familiarity your youngster has with a peer.

For instance, if your son bumps into a friend at a movie theater, depict how the initial greeting may lead to a short period of questioning about the movie, and finally to a closing remark about the next time he might see the peer again. Be sure to emphasize that what is said is just as important as perceiving the available cues in order to keep comments on target and within the boundaries of the environment.

Refer to boundaries as the lines that keep people within the relationship road they are supposed to be on. Boundaries are a critical piece of the social puzzle, but are often ignored by kids with HFA and Asperger's since they are subtle and hard to distinguish.

Make boundaries visual by depicting the kinds of statements and behaviors that are appropriate to the particular “road” (write them within the road) and examples of responses that are not (write them outside of the road). Explain how behaving within the boundaries protect the feelings of others and tells people that we are aware of what is going on around us. Depict how boundaries are more narrow when first meeting people, but gradually widen as they become more familiar. Likewise, display how boundaries are narrow or wide depending on the people present, situation and other circumstances.

Offer ways of understanding humor or typical childhood banter that uses available environmental cues. Kids on the spectrum can easily get caught in the throes of strong emotional reactions to common antagonistic statements made by peers. The intention of such comments may be to entertain bystanders, self-inflate, or trigger over-reactions by the youngster in question. But no matter the intention, if your son reacts with verbal or physical aggression, he is going to pay severe penalties. This makes it especially critical to coach anticipation skills that normalize typical peer-baiting.

Draw another relationship road that depicts some of the standard comments that kids say to each other in various circumstances. Add a thinking bubble that contains a self-instruction to help your son keep his cool.

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

Multimedia Technologies--

Consider using multimedia technologies to augment social skills training for your son. Many types of multimedia technologies can be an excellent match for the specific learning styles and preferences of children with HFA and Asperger's (e.g., virtual environments, simulations, videos, etc.). Since most kids on the spectrum are visual learners, videos, simulations, virtual environments, pictures and other multimedia are effective teaching tools.

For example, you could video tape your son playing with friends, and then use the video to conduct a discussion (or “autopsy”) of the social interactions. Still images from the video could be captured and used to create a slide show with text or loaded onto a smart phone to be used as reminders when your son is in mainstream environments.

AS and HFA children seem to learn social skills best when they are taught in authentic situations using a variety of mediums. Role playing, listening to Social Stories, observing peer behavior, and conducting social skills autopsies can all be augmented with the use of multimedia tools.

==> Click here for information, and the associated parenting strategies, on dealing with Oppositional Defiant Disorder in kids and teens on the autism spectrum...

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

Crucial Classroom Modifications for Kids on the Spectrum: Tips for Teachers

“Are there some tips that my high functioning autistic daughter’s teacher could use to help her with things link reading, handwriting, taking notes, staying organized, homework, and so on? She’s currently struggling in several of these (and other) areas. Thanks in advance!”

Many students with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger’s do indeed struggle in those areas you listed. Let’s look briefly at each in turn:

Reading—

The amount of reading the student on the autism spectrum is expected to complete should be evaluated by the teacher. These “special needs” children (who sometimes read slowly and can’t discern relevant from irrelevant information) spend a lot of time concentrating on facts that will not be tested and are considered unimportant.

Highlighted texts and study guides help them maximize their reading time. Educators also should consider identifying the information the student is responsible to learn for an upcoming assignment or test.

Handwriting—

Handwriting is a concern for many kids on the spectrum. Thus, educators should offer them several ways to demonstrate mastery, including (a) giving verbal responses instead of written essays, (b) using the computer instead of a pen or pencil, (c) completing a multiple-choice rather than a short-answer test, and (d) creating a project rather than writing a report.

Note-taking—

Many children with HFA and Asperger’s have difficulty taking notes in class. Often, motor-skills deficits prevent them from getting important content onto paper. In addition, some have difficulty listening and writing at the same time (they can do both, but often not at the same time).

Depending on the amount of assistance they need, the teacher can provide (a) a complete outline including the main idea and supporting details, (b) a skeletal outline that they can use to fill in details, (c) a peer-constructed outline, and (d) the opportunity to use outlining software.

Graphic Organizers—

Graphic organizers highlight important concepts and display the relationship between them. They provide abstract or implicit information in a concrete manner. Graphic organizers can be used before, during, or after these students read a selection – either as an advanced organizer or as a measure of concept attainment.

Three commonly used graphic organizers are semantic maps, analogy graphic organizers, and timelines.

• Semantic maps: The focal point of the semantic map is the key word or concept enclosed in a geometric figure (e.g., circle or square) or in a pictorial representation of the word or concept. Lines or arrows connect this central shape to other shapes. Words or information related to the central concept are written on the connecting lines or in the other shapes. As the map expands, the words become more specific and detailed. In addition, semantic maps can use pictures for the key words or concepts.
• Analogy graphic organizers: These contain two concepts and their attributes. The teacher and student define how the two concepts are alike and how they differ, then draw a conclusion. Often the teacher has to assist the youngster in identifying attributes by presenting choices, either written or pictorial, from which the he or she can select. This task can be completed individually, in small groups, or with an entire class.
• Timelines: These provide benchmarks for completing tasks and thereby aid the student in budgeting his or her time. Timelines consist of a list of steps needed to complete the task with concomitant due dates. This visual representation enables the student and teacher to monitor progress toward project completion. Ideally, educators enlist the aid of parents in developing and monitoring timelines to ensure the student follows through at home.

Homework—

Educators and parents should work together to determine whether or not homework should be assigned, and if so, how much. Because students with HFA and Asperger’s need structure, it is often best for educators to assign tasks that the student can complete in the structured school environment.

If homework is assigned, an assignment notebook and a parent-teacher communication system will help parents monitor their youngster's homework. In some cases, the parent may have to model the task for his or her child. Therefore, educators should ensure that the parent understands the youngster's homework.

To facilitate home-school communication, schools can establish a "homework line" that both the parent and child can call to hear an overview of assigned work. This system is ideal for students on the autism spectrum.

More resources for parents (and teachers):

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

___________________

Do you need the advice of a professional who specializes in parenting children and teens with Autism Spectrum Disorders?  Sign-up for Online Parent Coaching today.

The SOCCSS Strategy for Teaching Social Skills to Kids on the Autism Spectrum

“Is there a simple method I can implement to teach my son (high functioning) how to be more social in a positive way? Currently, he has problems interacting with peers in a way that does not cause conflict (and resultant rejection from those peers)?”

A great technique, the Situation, Options, Consequences, Choices, Strategies, Simulation (SOCCSS) strategy, is relatively simple and is used to help kids who have High-Functioning Autism and Asperger’s with social interaction problems, as well as teach them how to put interpersonal relationships into a sequential form.

SOCCSS helps these “special needs” children understand problem situations and lets them see that they have to make choices about a given situation, with each choice having a consequence.

The steps of SOCCSS are as follows, and can be used by both parents and teachers:

1. Situation: When a social problem arises, the parent or teacher helps the child to understand the situation by first identifying (a)who was involved, (b) what happened, (c) the date, day, and time of occurrence, and (d) reasons for the present situation.

2. Options: The child, with the assistance of the adult, brainstorms several options for behavior. At this point, the parent or teacher accepts all of the child’s responses and does not evaluate them. This step encourages him or her to see more than one perspective and to realize that any one situation presents several behavioral options.

3. Consequences: Then the child and adult work together to evaluate each of the options generated. The parent or teacher is a facilitator, helping the youngster to develop consequences for each option rather than dictating them.

4. Choices: The child selects the option or options that will have the most desirable consequences for him or her.

5. Strategy: Next the child and adult develop an action plan to implement the selected option.

6. Simulation: Lastly, the child is given an opportunity to role-play the selected alternative. Simulation may be in the form of (a) role play, (b) visualization, (c) writing a plan, or (d) talking with a peer.

This strategy offers many benefits to the youngster on the autism spectrum. It allows him or her to (a) understand that many options may be available in any given situation, (b) realize that each option has a naturally occurring consequence, and (c) develop a sense of empowerment by acting on the environment (i.e., these children realize that they have choices, and by selecting one, they can directly determine the consequences of their actions).

More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:
 

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

Academic Traits of Students on the Autism Spectrum: What Teachers Need to Know

“Would my child (6 years old) with high-functioning autism be better served by an alternative or private school? Is it possible for him to succeed in regular public school? Are there special issues his teacher should be made aware of?”

Most kids with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger’s (AS) receive their education in general education classrooms, albeit frequently with the support of Special Education teachers. 

 

Most of these young people are well equipped to benefit from general classroom experiences. They typically have average intellectual abilities, are motivated to be with their peers, and have good rote memory skills and other assets that bode well for their academic success.

However, some kids with HFA and AS do have several problems in academic performance, largely due to social and communication deficits connected to the disorder. Also, some of them have a learning disability. 

Other concerns that make it difficult for some children on the autism spectrum to benefit from general education curricula without support and accommodations include:

• concrete and literal thinking styles
• difficulty attending to salient curricular cues
• difficulty in discerning relevant from irrelevant stimuli
• inflexibility
• difficulty understanding inferentially-based materials
• obsessive and narrowly defined interests
• poor organizational skills
• relative weakness in comprehending verbally presented information
• poor problem-solving skills
• trouble generalizing knowledge and skills
• difficulty in comprehending abstract materials (e.g., metaphors and idioms)

Strengths of young people with HFA and AS tend to be in comprehension of factual material. They are also very good in the areas of oral expression and reading recognition. With appropriate support, most kids on the spectrum can be successful in public school, and many are able to attend college or technical school - and enjoy a variety of successful careers.

Many teachers fail to recognize the unique academic needs of students on the autism spectrum, because they often give the impression that they understand more than they do. Their pedantic style, seemingly advanced vocabulary, parrot-like responses, and ability to word-call (without having the higher-order thinking and comprehension skills to understand what they read) may actually mask many of the deficits these students struggle with.

Highly Acclaimed Parenting Programs Offered by Online Parent Support, LLC:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

Behavioral and Emotional Problems in Students on the Autism Spectrum that Teachers Need To Be Aware Of

“Is it common for a child with autism (high functioning) to have more behavior problems at school than at home? My 13 y.o. son has been getting a lot of time in detention. Can I excuse him from it and not reschedule? A teacher gave him detention for what I consider to be an unfair reason, and she refuses to hear his side. He goes to a public middle school.”

RE: “Can I excuse him from it and not reschedule?”

You don’t have the authority to exempt your son from the school's disciplinary actions. If there is a problem with a particular disciplinary process (e.g., detention scheduled to be served at a time that creates a hardship for you), you can contact the school's administrative staff to ask for consideration of an alternative date and time for the detention.

RE: “Is it common for a child with autism (high functioning) to have more behavior problems at school than at home?”

Yes, many children with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger’s do act-out in the classroom, largely due to (a) over-stimulation of the senses (e.g., florescent lights, smells from the cafeteria, noisy and crowded hallways, etc.) as well as (b) social skills deficits (e.g., when the youngster fails to take his turn in a playground game because he doesn't understand the social rules of an activity).

Furthermore, these challenges frequently involve feelings of anxiety, loss of control, and an inability to predict outcomes. Rather than simply trying to be defiant or disruptive, students on the autism spectrum typically have behavior problems connected to their inability to function in a world they see as unpredictable and threatening. In other words, when they have behavioral difficulties, their problems are most often associated with their social ineptness, an obsessive interest in a particular subject, a defensive panic reaction, etc.

Many of the traits of the disorder can look like purposeful misbehavior in the eyes of teachers. For example:

• attention problems may be viewed as simply “not paying attention”
• become overwhelmed with too much verbal direction may be viewed as “unwarranted expression of frustration”
• difficulty maintaining friendships can be viewed as “antisocial behavior”
• difficulty transitioning from one activity to another may be perceived as “oppositional behavior”
• difficulty waiting for their turn (e.g., standing in line) may be looked at as “impulsivity”
• difficulty with fine motor activities (e.g., coloring, printing, using scissors, gluing) may be viewed a pure “laziness”
• difficulty with reading comprehension (e.g., can quote an answer, but unable to predict, summarize or find symbolism) may come across as simply “ignoring the teacher’s instructions”
• meltdowns are often viewed as “tantrums”

Moms and dads usually have significantly greater concern about the behavior and social skills of their “special needs” youngster than his or her teachers do. Parents often perceive their child to have substantial deficits in a variety of socially-related areas (e.g., conduct problems, aggression, hyperactivity, etc.) as well as internalizing problems (e.g., withdrawal).

Teachers, on the other hand, often perceive the HFA or Asperger’s student to have both fewer and less significant deficits than do parents – and may mistakenly discipline the child for “poor conduct” rather than recognizing the extra challenges the “special needs” student must contend with. Thus, it’s important for parents to educate their child’s teachers on his or her specific challenges that result in behavioral and/or emotional struggles.

But, each case is significantly different! Sometimes "misbehavior" is exactly that - misbehavior - and not necessarily a trait of the disorder. This is were it gets tricky. A particular behavioral problem (e.g., yelling at the teacher) in one student on the spectrum may be motivated by sensory issues, whereas that same behavior in another student on the spectrum may be simple rebelliousness. Which if which? Only the teacher who is well-educated on the symptoms of the disorder, as they relate specifically to the child in question, will know.

Highly Acclaimed Parenting Programs Offered by Online Parent Support, LLC:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

____________________

Do you need the advice of a professional who specializes in parenting children and teens with Autism Spectrum Disorders?  Sign-up for Online Parent Coaching today.