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Meditations for People on the Autism Spectrum Who Suffer from Chronic Anxiety

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Calming Techniques for High-Functioning Autistic Children (ASD Level 1)

"What are some things I can do as a parent of a 6-year-old autistic son (high-functioning) to help him calm down when he has a temper tantrum (which usually results in him hurting himself or destroying something in the house)? He just started the first grade, and his teacher is already having issues with his behavior as well."

In order to understand what calming techniques will work, you will first need to determine what things excite and upset your high-functioning autistic (HFA) son, and have some understanding of the context in which he is throwing a tantrum.

1. Make sure your child knows what the expectations are, and do not confuse the issue with trying to talk to him about things at a time when he is already upset.

2. Try to redirect him to an alternative activity -- something that he enjoys. 

3. If this does not stop the tantrum, tell him to stop. Don't add any extras, just STOP -- calmly and directly.

4. If he still doesn't stop, provide some physical redirection to an area where he can calm down. It can be very effective to call this his SAFE place. It may include a bean-bag chair, where he can sit. But, eliminate any extras in the area, such as toys, or other preferred items. If he doesn't voluntarily go to his SAFE place, physically escort him there.


5. Tell him he must be calm for 5 minutes before he can get up.

This may seem like a overly simple process in order to deal with what may be a challenging behavior. The key is to be consistent, so that he will always know what is coming. If the child is in school, try to provide this program across all environments.

It is amazing how many HFA children will actually learn to go to their SAFE place independently, as a way for them to control themselves. We want them to self-monitor their behavior and show them that we believe they have the ability to calm themselves down.
 

There are no easy and quick fixes to reduce or eliminate severe behavioral problems (e.g., self-injury, aggressiveness, severe tantrums and destructiveness). There may be, however, a few fixes that may not require an incredible amount of time and effort to implement:

1. One possible reason for behavioral problems may be difficulties in receptive language. HFA kids often have poor auditory processing skills. As a result, they often do not understand what people are saying to them (i.e., they hear the words but they do not understand what the words mean). The child’s lack of understanding can lead to confusion and frustration, which can escalate into behavior problems. Visual communication systems can be useful in teaching and in informing kids of what is planned and what is expected of them.

2. Behavioral problems may also be due to difficulties in expressive language. In fact, many researchers feel strongly that the majority of behavioral problems are simply due to poor expressive communication skills. There are numerous communication strategies, such as the Picture Exchange Communication System and Simultaneous Communication (i.e., using speech and sign language at the same time) which can be used to teach expressive communication skills.

3. Food allergies are an often overlooked cause of behavior problems. Some kids may have red ears, red cheeks, or dark circles under their eyes. These are often signs of food allergies. The most common allergens are dairy and wheat products, food preservatives, and food coloring. Some of the symptoms associated with food allergies are headaches, tantrums, feelings of nausea or spaciness, and stomach aches. As a result, the child is less tolerant of others and he/she may be more likely to strike out at others or have a tantrum.

Since many of these kids have poor communication skills, the parent and/or teacher may not be aware that the child is not feeling well. The child should be tested if food allergies are suspected. If the child tests positive for certain foods, then these products should be eliminated from his/her diet.

4. If the child’s behavior is worse at school but not at home, there are many possible reasons, such as a lack of consistency. There are, however, several physical causes that should be considered. Two possible causes, which are seldom considered, are cleaning solvents and florescent classroom lighting. Janitors often use powerful chemicals to clean the classroom. Although the smell may be gone by the next day, the chemical residue may still be in the air and on surfaces. Breathing these chemicals may affect sensitive people. During the day, students often place their hands and face on the tables and floors, and these chemicals can eventually wind up in the child’s mouth and alter brain functioning and behavior. Many parents and teachers wipe the students’ desks with water or a natural cleaning solution prior to class each morning, and they have reported rather remarkable improvements in the students’ behaviors.

Florescent lighting, which is the most common lighting used in classrooms, may also affect behavior. Many adults with autism report that florescent lights bothered them greatly during their school years. In addition, U.C.L.A. researchers observed more repetitive, self-stimulatory behaviors under florescent lighting compared to incandescent lighting. Teachers may want to turn off the florescent lighting in their classroom for a few days to see if there is a decrease in behavioral problems for some or all of the students. During this trial period, the teacher can use natural light from the windows and/or incandescent lights.
 

5. In many instances, a behavior problem is a reaction to a request or demand made by a caregiver/teacher. The child may have learned that he/she can escape or avoid such situations, such as working on a task, by ‘acting up.’ A functional assessment of the child’s behavior (i.e., antecedents, consequences, context of the behavior) may reveal certain relationships between the behavior and the function the behavior serves. If avoidance is the function the behavior serves, the caregiver/teacher should follow through with all requests and demands he/she makes to the child. If the child is able to escape or avoid such situations, even only some of the time, the behavior problem will likely continue.

6. It is also important to consider the child’s level of arousal when formulating a strategy to treat behavioral problems. Sometimes behavioral problems occur when the child is overly excited. This can occur when the child is anxious and/or when there is too much stimulation in the environment. In these cases, treatment should be aimed at calming the child.

Some popular calming techniques include: vigorous exercise (e.g., a stationary bicycle) which would act as a release of their high excitement level, vestibular stimulation (e.g., slow swinging), and deep pressure (e.g., Temple Grandin’s Hug Machine). In some cases, behavioral problems may be due to a low level of arousal such as when the child is passive or bored. Behaviors such as aggression and destructiveness may be exciting, and thus appealing, to some of these kids. If one suspects behavior problems are due to underarousal, the child should be kept busy or active. Vigorous exercise is another good way to increase arousal level.

7. Many families are giving their children safe nutritional supplements, such as Vitamin B6 with magnesium and Di-methyl-glycine (DMG). Nearly half have reported a reduction in behavioral problems as well as improvements in the child’s general well-being. Sometimes powerful drugs are prescribed to autistic kids to treat their behavior. Interestingly, the most commonly prescribed drug for autistic children is Ritalin. A survey conducted by the Autism Research Institute in San Diego revealed that 45% of 2,788 parents felt that Ritalin made their child’s behavior worse and only 20% reported improvement (27% of parents of autistic children felt that Ritalin made no difference).

8. Occasionally a child may exhibit a behavior problem at school but not at home, or vice versa. For example, the parent may have already developed a strategy to stop the behavior at home, but the teacher is unaware of this strategy. It is important that the parent and teacher discuss the child’s behavioral problems since one of them may have already discovered a solution to handle the behavior.

 
Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 

==> Videos for Parents of Children and Teens with ASD

  
PARENTS' COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said... A weighted blanket. Or a calm room at school.
•    Anonymous said... At home, we started with a lycra style sensory swing. Then once he sort of brought it down a notch we started sending him to his room (most of our meltdowns were also correlated with bad behavior), in his room we have a heavy comforter, a bean bag, a DVD player with story DVDs and we recently added a lycra sheet on his bed. We set the timer based on his offense and willingness to go to his room, he usually first goes right under his bean bag then he will usually lay on the bean bag with the heavy comforter and watch a story, or read a book. At school, we had to change programs.
•    Anonymous said... change is very difficult for them,does he have a therapy aid at school?
•    Anonymous said... Failing that a tent in the corner of the classroom?
•    Anonymous said... For my son, "tantrums or meltdowns" were usually the result of some anxiety that he didn't know how to handle. Figuring out what the problem was and teaching him to deal with it was helpful but was a process. My son needed to be able to leave the classroom which was very stimulating. Sometimes the hallway or even the OT room. We found that a certain book that played music worked to calm him at home and as he got older he started using it in his own. Sometimes I would Just hold him tight. If you pay close attention you will be able to figure out what works for him. Listen to your gut and remember that no one knows and loves him like you. It was very hard for our family at that age. He is 13 now and things have gotten so much better. There is hope!
•    Anonymous said... Get the best professional help while he is a little boy.
•    Anonymous said... Most meltdowns are a result of anxiety/stress/upsets. Fix the cause (whatis upsetting the child) and the meltdowns will ease off. Significantly.
•    Anonymous said... My 7yr just finished a 10 session program with his OT called the Alert Program - How Does Your Engine Run. It was awesome and he is sooo much better now for it. It helps the kids to recognise how their body is feeling and what types of things help them to get their 'engine' running just right. I can't say enough about it - absolutely amazing!!! My son would yell, throw things, hurt kids, bang and slam furniture/doors etc. We get the occasional growl or stomping feet when he is REALLY worked up, but the majority of the time we can nip it in the bud with what we both learnt at these sessions
•    Anonymous said... My son's teachers allowed him to pick a place in the classroom that he could go to when he felt upset. It seemed like it helped a lot. One year it was under the row of "cubbies" and coat hooks. It was usually only for a few minutes, but seemed to help him. Now that he is a little older they have a resource room between the classrooms and he can sit in there until he calms himself.
•    Anonymous said... Needs a good routine at school, talk to teacher and tell her parts of your routine at home, All about routine and prompts. I always use the clock, when change occur, always a quick 10 minute reminder, AS children love knowing what's set out for them in the day, as you know they don't really like change. Sleep is another important issue. I hope this has helped you.
•    Anonymous said... Prevention.
•    Anonymous said... Rescue Remedy!!!!

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How can children on the autism spectrum cope with anger and depression?

"I have a 6 y.o. son (high functioning autism). When he gets upset, he throws his head back and hits his head on the floor or anything he is near. I am so worried about him. He also won't play with other children, he throws things at them ...it's so hard! He is starting to have these fits at school as well. He also seems somewhat depressed a lot of the time. We didn't have these issues prior to elementary school. Any helpful advice would be greatly appreciated. I just want my happy child back."

Unfortunately, anger and depression are both issues more common in ASD or High-Functioning Autism (HFA) than in the general population. Part of the problem stems from a conflict between longings for social contact and an inability to be social in ways that attract friendships and relationships.

Even very young kids on the autism spectrum seem to know that they are not the same as other kids, and this gets emphasized in the social arena of the classroom. Many cases of depression, in fact, begin in elementary school (usually due to bullying and being an "outcast"). Anger, too, stems from feeling out of place and being angry at one’s circumstances in life.

Ideally, the focus should be on prevention and on helping HFA children develop communication skills, social skills, and develop a healthy self-esteem. These things can create the ability to develop relationships and friendships, lessening the chances of having issues with anger or depression.

Anger outbursts can also occur when rituals can’t get accomplished or when the child's need for order or symmetry can’t be met. Frustration over what doesn’t usually bother others can lead to anger and violence. This kind of anger is best handled through cognitive-behavioral therapy that focuses on maintaining control in spite of the frustration of not having one's needs met.

Communication and friendship skills can be taught to HFA children, teenagers, and even grown-ups. Mastering these skills can eliminate much of the social isolation these individuals feel. These skills can also avert - or reverse - depression and anger symptoms. (Click here for more information about helping with friendship skills.)

In worst case scenarios, some kids on the spectrum become so depressed that they may commit suicide (usually in adolescence). Others become angry enough that they get violent and hurt - or kill - others as a result. The challenge becomes recognizing these individuals (who are the exception by the way) before they do harm to self or others and getting them into therapy so that tragedy can be avoided.



==> Videos for Parents of Children and Teens with ASD

 
COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said...I'm so sorry. I wish there was a special place for our high functioning kiddos because they are more aware of the social stimulation and expectations around them. My son was forever changed by school expectations!! The anxiety and stimulation is just too much....look for options or try medication for anxiety. That is what helped my son. He started hiding in bushes and refusing to return to class in second grade. It is frustrating getting phone calls from school! I feel for you.
•    Anonymous said...Try to get an IEP for him at school ASAP. His stress and depression is likely due to a large amount of forced socialization that didn't occur before Kindergarten. Aspergers children cannot be forced into interaction, they will only melt down if you do. Have your school evaluate your son to see what options are available. If possible, ask his teacher to create a space for him in the classroom that he can retreat to if need be. This will greatly reduce his stress and any risk to other children. My son had similar problems when he started school last year. He had so many suspensions I lost count. He now has a class that he goes to once per week that teaches social skills, and he has improved so much! It is absolutely worth looking into. Contact the school guidance counselor. They will know the appropriate first step in your area.
•    Anonymous said...Well I would have his meds looked at. It gets harder to get them under control but really needed. Some schools aren't much help.

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Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

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Parenting Teens on the Autism Spectrum: Changes in Adolescence

"My high functioning autistic son will become an official teenager next week (13th birthday). Any advice on what parents should do differently with an HFA teen vs. a child?"

First of all, there's no need to worry. Children with ASD or High-Functioning Autism eventually go through adolescence on their way toward becoming strong, focused adults -- regardless of the misinformation you may have been fed.

While adolescence is a difficult time for all teens, it can easily be much worse for those dealing with HFA. With the right education and support, most of these young people go on to graduate from high school.

Because they tend to be loners and have odd mannerisms, HFA teens can be shunned from popular groups of kids -- and can be the focus of teasing. Even so, these teens develop feelings for others they become attracted to, though they can’t always express their feelings correctly.

This can lead to frustration and anger in the HFA teen who develops his/her first tentative relationships. They are more likely to face rejection from their peers and be left with a low self-esteem as a result.

Often, a teen on the autism spectrum fares best with one or two close friends with whom they can practice adolescent social skills and "growing up" behaviors. Even one relatively close relationship can make the difference between a depressed, awkward teen -- and one who is beginning to learn valuable social skills with a select few others.

Parents and family may need to help facilitate relationships between their "special needs" teenager and other teens his own age. Offering to have other teens overnight or taking their teen to an activity with one or two other acquaintances can help facilitate closer connections between their child and others his own age.

Having a teen "love experience" is often much more difficult for teens on the spectrum. Their tendency to want to be alone comes into conflict with their desire to be close to another person. Psychotherapy and family support can go a long way toward helping a teen with HFA get through the difficult adolescent time.




In summary:
  • With the right education and support, most HFA teens go on to graduate from high school. 
  • Teens on the spectrum fare best with one or two close friends with whom they can practice adolescent social skills.
  • Parents may need to help facilitate relationships between their teenager and other teens his own age.
  • Psychotherapy and family support can go a long way toward helping a teen with special needs to get through the difficult adolescent time.

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Crucial Strategies for Parents of Challenging Kids on the Autism Spectrum

    Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum :   ==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children ...