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Finding Hidden Meaning Behind Problematic Behaviors in Kids with ASD

"Question: How to know what triggers my son's (high functioning autistic) difficult behavior? Thanks in advance!"

Many parents of children with ASD - Level 1 [High-Functioning Autism] have discovered that some of their youngster’s behaviors make no obvious sense and do not serve any clear purpose. But when these children engage in “odd” or confusing behavior, they are also sending the parent hidden clues about things that are important to them. Thus, it’s the parent’s job is to break the code so she can interpret the clues.

By becoming more like a “detective,” parents can begin to notice coded messages they didn’t see before, and as a result, find more effective ways to help their “special needs” youngster. Becoming a good detective also helps parents respond more carefully to peculiar behaviors so they don’t unintentionally reinforce or reward them.

Parents of autistic children can begin to develop “investigator skills” by recording problematic behaviors, similar to how Jane Goodall studied chimpanzees. For example: 
  • Is the child attempting to avoid a demanding task?
  • What activities or interactions take place just prior to the problematic behavior? 
  • Does the same thing often happen first?
  • What time do these events most often happen?
  • Are there any settings where the behavior does not occur?
  • In what settings is the behavior observed? 
  • Is the behavior problem associated with certain social or environmental conditions? 
  • What usually happens immediately after the behavior? 
  • Who is present when the behavior occurs?

 ==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism

Most difficult behaviors are triggered by an event. Just as you might suddenly feel thirsty as you walk past a lemonade stand, there are “triggers” in your youngster’s life that elicit certain behaviors. Use a diary to try to identify these triggers for your youngster’s most challenging behaviors. Instead of getting upset with your child when he or she acts-out, look for how the context is out of synch with him or her. View the incident as an opportunity to learn more about your child.



Here is a good example of items to list in your diary:

Behavioral Investigation—

Date: ______
  1. Describe the behavior of concern: _______________
  2. How can I tell the behavior is about to start? _______________
  3. How intense is the behavior? _______________
  4. How long does it last? _______________
  5. How often does the behavior occur? _______________
  6. What behavior(s) might serve the same function for my child that is appropriate within the social/environmental context? _______________
  7. What conditions are most likely to precipitate (“set-off”) the behavior? _______________
  8. What does my child get or avoid? _______________
  9. What is happening when the behavior occurs? _______________
  10. What is the likely function (intent) of the behavior (i.e., why do I think my child behaves this way)? _______________
  11. What usually happens after the behavior? _______________
  12. When/where is the behavior most/least likely to occur? _______________
  13. With whom is the behavior most/least likely to occur? _______________
  14. What other information might contribute to creating an effective behavioral intervention plan (e.g., under what conditions does the behavior not occur)? _______________

Cognitive, Behavioral, and Moral Inflexibility in Kids on the Autism Spectrum 



Here are some crucial things to consider when doing your investigation:

1. As with any child, being hungry, thirsty, or tired can make your youngster grouchy. A chronic illness or low-grade infection can cause behavioral issues as well. Try to discover any – and all – possible sources of pain (e.g., abscesses, broken bones, bruises, cuts and splinters, gut, infections, acid reflux, sprains, teeth, etc.).

2. Consider sensory and emotional regulation. Your youngster’s sensory experiences are very different from the “typical” child. He is likely easily overwhelmed by information coming in through the senses (e.g., loud noises) and isn’t getting enough input from the senses responsible for self-awareness and regulation. We all know about the five senses: taste, touch, smell, sound, and sight. But there are two additional senses that are important to understand: the vestibular sense (controls balance) and proprioception (the sense of one’s body in space). In many autistic children, some of the information from these senses is too little, too much, or distorted –  leading to feelings of anxiety, physical pain, or disengagement. As a result, the child may “act-out” behaviorally as a way to cope.

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with High-Functioning Autism

3. Coordination problems can contribute to stress and behavior issues. For example, as anyone who has ever been picked last for a team knows, gym class can be nerve-wracking. If your youngster has trouble undoing zippers or buttons, the short time allotted for bathroom breaks or locker room changes can add tremendous pressure. Also, if the child walks awkwardly, negotiating a crowded hallway between classes is anxiety-producing. These issues often influence “acting-out” behaviors that, unfortunately, may result in the child receiving some form of punishment.

4. Peer-rejection is a big contributor to difficult behaviors. For example, maybe your son realizes he has no friends, so recess time is particularly tough for him. Also, do some investigation to see if bullying or teasing is an issue.

5. Attention-span difficulties can influence behavior, resulting in unwarranted punishment from teachers. For example, your youngster may “tune-out” during class because the teacher or the subject matter isn’t engaging enough. Talk with your child’s teacher if this appears to be an issue.

6. Some problematic behaviors, especially those that seem abrupt or particularly odd, may be due to seizures. If you think this could be an issue, keep a very careful record of what you observe. Also, see if your youngster’s teacher has similar observations.

7. Changes in home-life can contribute to behavior problems (e.g., health crisis, job change, move, new sibling, mom and dad going through a divorce, etc.). Often times, well-meaning parents think their “special needs” child is handling everything fine, so there is no reason to be concerned. But if parents are stressed about something, chances are their youngster will be, too – especially if she is powerless to do anything about it.

8. Try to identify any food sensitivities or allergies that could be troubling your youngster. Look for the signs of a problem in this area (e.g., red/flushed cheeks or ears, diarrhea within a few hours of eating a particular food, etc.). Food sensitivity is often one of the biggest contributors to “mysterious” and sudden changes in behavior.

In summary, rather than viewing your child’s behavior as “misbehavior,” look attentively for the clues that he or she is sending by conducting your own investigation. With a little good detective work, parents can narrow down exactly what initiates certain unwanted behaviors. Then, once the problem has been identified, parents are in a much better position to employ effective prevention and intervention strategies.
By

Helping Kids on the Autism Spectrum Avoid the "Back To School Jitters"

"I have a little boy with high functioning autism that is feeling a lot of dread now that he has returned to school. I would welcome some ideas on how to make this transition as smooth and stress free as possible."

Preparing kids with Aspergers (AS) and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) for the new school year requires a little more than making sure uniforms fit and backpacks are filled with all the necessary school supplies. Most U.S. schools will open their doors in August. Before then, moms and dads need to ensure all their documents are in order, transportation is prepared, and good communication is established with their youngster's school.

Here are 25 ways in which you can help your youngster prepare for the new school year:

1. Ask the school whether you will be able to walk your child into the classroom and hand him off to the teacher.  Find out how long you will be able to stay.  If you suspect that your son or daughter might have a hard time saying goodbye, by all means speak with the teacher now and make a plan for how to handle the first day. 

2. Ask the teacher to provide you with the daily class routine so that you can review this schedule with your child at home.

3. Be sure all children lay out clothes the night before, that lunches are made, and that everyone gets enough sleep and a healthy breakfast.  Plan to arrive at school early so you have time for meaningful goodbyes.  And don’t forget that “first day of school” photo before you leave home!

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

4. Bring a camera and ask to take photos of the new classroom, teacher and surroundings.

5. Create a “Transition Book” for your child. This is a book about your youngster’s new teacher and class. You can use the photos you took during your meeting at the school. Look at the book regularly to help your child become familiar with the new environment.



6. Encourage your child’s questions by asking what she thinks school will be like.  Emphasize the things you think she’ll enjoy, but be sure not to minimize her fears. Children can be stricken by worries that parents might find silly (e.g., finding the bathroom at school). Normalize any fears and reassure her that she will have fun, that the school can reach you if necessary, and that your love is always with her even when you aren’t.

7. Facilitate bonding with the other children. Children are always nervous about their new teacher, but if they know any of the other children, they’ll feel more at ease.  

8. Facilitate your child’s bonding with the teacher.  All children need to feel connected to their teacher to feel comfortable in the classroom.   Until they do, they are not ready to learn.  Experienced educators know this, and “collect” their students emotionally at the start of the school year. 

9. Find out what other children are in your child’s class and arrange a play date so she’ll feel more connected if she hasn’t seen these children all summer.

10. Get your child back on an early to bed schedule well before school starts.  Most children begin staying up late in the summer months.  But children need 9 ½ to 11 hours of sleep a night, depending on their age. Getting them back on schedule so they’re sound asleep by 9pm to be up at 7am for school takes a couple of weeks of gradually moving the bedtime earlier. Imposing an early bedtime cold turkey the night before school starts results in a youngster who simply isn’t ready for an earlier bedtime, having slept in that morning and with the night-before-school jitters.  In that situation, you can expect everyone’s anxiety to escalate.  So keep an eye on the calendar and start moving bedtime a bit earlier every night by having children read in bed for an hour before lights out, which is also good for their reading skills.

11. Get yourself to bed early the night before school so you can get up early enough to deal calmly with any last minute crises. 

12. If a younger sibling will be at home with you, be sure your child knows how boring it will be at home and how jealous you and the younger sibling are that you don’t get to go to school like a big kid.  Explain that every day after school you will have special time with your big girl to hear all about her day and have a snack together.

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

13. If you’re new in town, make a special effort to meet other children in the neighborhood.  Often schools are willing to introduce new families to each other, allowing children to connect with other new students in the weeks before school starts. 

14. If your youngster gets teary when you say goodbye, reassure her that she will be fine and that you can’t wait to see her at the end of the day.  Use the goodbye routine you’ve practiced, and then hand her off to her teacher.  Don’t leave her adrift without a new attachment person, but once you’ve put her in good hands, don’t worry. 

15. Let your child choose his own school supplies, whether from around your house or from the store, and ready them in his backpack or bag. 

16. Make sure you’re a few minutes early to pick your child up that first week of school.  Not seeing you immediately will exacerbate any anxieties he has and may panic him altogether.  If your child cries when you pick him up, don’t worry.  You’re seeing the stress of his having to keep it together all day and be a big boy.

17. Moms and dads need to review special education documents such as individualized education plans, or IEPs, and meet with principals and, if possible, educators to ensure everyone is on the same page as far as the students' needs are concerned -- from modified teaching lessons to transportation.  Moms and dads should go through their youngster's IEPs before the school year starts and make a list of anything ambiguous, or something you don't quite understand.  After completing your homework, you may realize that your child's IEP is lacking or needs adjustment. You may want to consult with an independent professional (e.g., psychologist or behaviorist) and/or convene with the IEP team to discuss your youngsters changing needs. Moms and dads can call an IEP meeting at any time, and the district is required to hold the meeting at a mutually convenient date/time within 30 calendar days (beginning with the first day of school and excluding any breaks that are two weeks or more). As always, be sure to make your request in writing.

18. Once school has started, check-in with your child’s new teacher on a regular basis to see if the transition has been successful.

19. Research shows that children forget a lot during the summer.  If your child has been reading through the summer months, congratulations!  If not, this is the time to start.  Visit the library and let him pick some books he’ll enjoy.  Introduce the idea that for the rest of the summer everyone in the family will read for an hour every day.

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

20. Share your own stories about things you loved about school.

21. Start conversations about the next grade at school or about beginning school.  One good way to do this is to select books relating to that grade.  Your librarian can be helpful. Get your children excited by talking about what they can expect, including snack, playground, reading, computers, singing and art.  If you know other kids who will be in his class or in the school, be sure to mention that he will see or play with them. 

22. Take advantage of any orientation opportunities.  Many schools let new students, especially in the younger grades, come to school for an orientation session before school begins.  If the school doesn’t have such a program, ask if you and your child can come by to meet the new teacher for a few minutes a day or so before school starts.  Educators are busy preparing their rooms and materials at that time, but any experienced teacher is happy to take a few minutes to meet a new student and make him feel comfortable, since she knows that helps her students settle into the school year.

23. The day before school starts, talk about exactly what will happen the next day to give your child a comfortable mental movie. Be alert for signs that he is worried, and reflect that most children are a little nervous before the first day of school, but that he will feel right at home in his new classroom soon. 

24. There are many books and computer applications for kids that tell social stories. Provide your child with social stories that model appropriate behavior at school and with other kids.

25. Try to arrange for your child to travel to school that first morning with a youngster he or she knows. Even if they aren’t in the same classroom, it will ease last minute jitters.




 
Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
 
 
More articles for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the ASD child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

Click here to read the full article…

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Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's or HFA child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and your child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.

Click here for the full article...

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Although Aspergers [high-functioning autism] is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager on the spectrum are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

Click here to read the full article…

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Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with ASD face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

Click here to read the full article…

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Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

Click here to read the full article...

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Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.

Click here for the full article...
 
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A child with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) can have difficulty in school because, since he fits in so well, many adults may miss the fact that he has a diagnosis. When these children display symptoms of their disorder, they may be seen as defiant or disruptive.

Click here for the full article...
By

Pragmatic Language Impairment in Kids on the Autism Spectrum



"Any tips on how to help my high functioning child who has problems making friends, mostly because he initiates conversations that are off-topic or one-sided? He also has problems following conversations from others - so he reverts back to his topic of interest (make sense?)."

Pragmatic speech is language used to communicate and socialize (e.g., knowing what to say, how to say it, when to say it, and generally how to “act” around others during conversation). Many children with Asperger’s (AS) and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) have difficulty using language in various social situations – even though they may have large vocabularies and are able to speak in full sentences that are clearly articulated. These “special needs” children may say words clearly and use long, complex sentences with correct grammar, but still have a communication problem if they haven’t mastered the rules for social language known as pragmatics.

Children with pragmatic speech issues may embarrass their parents (albeit unintentionally because they lack social skills) by making what others view as rude comments. They may have little variety in language use, say inappropriate or unrelated things during conversations, or tell stories in a disorganized way.



Pragmatics involve 3 major communication skills:
  1. Changing language according to the needs of the listener or situation (e.g., talking differently to a baby than to a grown-up, speaking differently in a classroom than on a playground, giving background information to an unfamiliar listener, etc.)
  2. Following rules for conversations and storytelling (e.g., how close to stand to someone when speaking, how to use facial expressions and eye contact, how to use verbal and nonverbal signals, introducing topics of conversation, rephrasing when misunderstood, staying on topic, taking turns in conversation, etc.)
  3. Using language for different purposes (e.g., requesting, promising, informing, greeting, demanding, etc.)

All kids have pragmatic difficulties in some situations. But, if problems in social language use occur often and seem inappropriate considering your youngster's age, he or she may have a pragmatic disorder. Children with Pragmatic Language Disorder have particular trouble understanding the meaning of what others are saying, and they are challenged in using language appropriately to get their needs met and interact with peers.

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

Young people with the disorder often exhibit the following: 
  • aphasic speech (e.g., word search pauses, jargoning, word order errors, word category errors, verb tense errors)
  • delayed language development
  • difficulty explaining or describing an event
  • difficulty extracting the key points from a conversation or story
  • difficulty following conversations or stories
  • difficulty in distinguishing offensive remarks
  • difficulty in making and maintaining friendships and relationships because of delayed language development
  • difficulty in reading comprehension
  • difficulty understanding choices and making decisions
  • difficulty understanding contextual cues
  • difficulty understanding questions
  • difficulty understanding satire or jokes
  • difficulty with organizational skills
  • difficulty with pronouns or pronoun reversal
  • difficulty with reading body language
  • difficulty with verb tenses
  • stuttering or cluttering speech
  • tendency to be concrete or prefer facts to stories
  • tendency to get lost in the details
  • tendency to initiate conversations that are "off-topic" or "one-sided"
  • tendency to repeat words or phrases

Pragmatic disorders often coexist with other language problems (e.g., vocabulary development, grammar). In addition, pragmatic problems often lower social acceptance (e.g., peers may avoid having conversations with the affected child).


Language Problems in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism 



Pragmatic Language Skills Development—

Moms and dads can help their AS and HFA children to use language appropriately in social situations (i.e., pragmatics). Here are some general suggestions to help develop these skills:

1. As often as needed, encourage your child to rephrase or revise an unclear word or sentence. Provide an appropriate rephrase or revision by asking, "Did you mean _____?"

2. As often as possible, take full advantage of naturally occurring “teaching-situations” throughout the day. For instance, have your child practice (a) requesting necessary materials to complete a project, (b) greetings at the beginning of a day, (c) saying goodbye to friends, (d) asking siblings what they want to eat for lunch, and so on.

3. Demonstrate how nonverbal cues are important to communication (e.g., talk about what happens when a facial expression does not match the emotion expressed in a verbal message, such as using angry words while smiling).

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

4. Pretending to talk to different people in different situations is a great pragmatics exercise (i.e., role-playing different conversations). For instance, create a situation in which your child has to explain the same thing to several people, such as how to make a grilled cheese sandwich or play a particular game. Model how your child should talk to a peer versus a grown-up, or a sibling versus a stranger.

5. Teach storytelling skills. Provide visual cues (e.g., pictures, objects, etc.) or a story outline to help tell a story in sequence.

6. Teach the use of “persuasion.” For instance, ask your child what she would say to convince you to let her do something. Discuss different ways to present a message. For example, indirect (“I wish I could go next door to see my friend.”) versus direct (“Can I go next door and see my friend?”), or impolite (“I’m not going to eat those green beans!”) versus polite (“Can I please have something other than green beans for my vegetable?”).

7. When your child speaks, respond to his “intended” message rather than correcting his grammar or pronunciation. Also, provide an appropriate model in your own speech. For instance, if your child says, "That's how it doesn't work," you can respond with, "Correct. That's not how it works.”

Kids with pragmatic language impairment are often unable to vary their language use, to relate information or stories in an organized way, or to say appropriate and “on-topic” things during conversations. Pragmatic speech disorder can also be related to difficulties with grammar and vocabulary development. As kids get older and more social skills are demanded, peers may avoid conversation with the child experiencing pragmatic speech problems. As a result, these “special needs” kids have fewer friends, are less accepted in social situations, and may be bullied or teased by peers.

If you think your AS or HFA youngster may have a pragmatic speech problem, contact a local licensed speech pathologist for an evaluation.


More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book


==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
By

Best Social Stories for Kids on the Autism Spectrum

Social stories are written with the purpose of teaching a youngster specific behavior patterns. They have often been used to help kids on the autism spectrum to learn social skills and behavior management. Here are our top 12 picks for social stories:


























By

The Easily Discouraged Student on the Autism Spectrum: Tips for Parents and Teachers

"I need some ideas on how to build some confidence in one of my students who has been diagnosed with autism recently (high functioning). Now that he knows he has this condition, his self esteem has taken a turn for the worse. He won't even hand-in assignments because he's sure (in his mind) he will get an 'F' (which he does for not handing it in), which just reinforces his negative view of himself."

If you have a youngster with Asperger’s (AS) or High-Functioning Autism (HFA), you’ve likely experienced some aggravation over the numerous outbursts and unexpected meltdowns brought on by an unexpected trigger.

However, many of the triggers that result in behavioral issues may be directly related to the child’s frustration over not being able to complete a certain task or perform to his or her self-imposed expectations. This can, in turn, contribute to feelings of discouragement that result in the child “giving-up” (i.e., refusing to give things a second try).

The easily discouraged AS or HFA child may exhibit any or all of the following:
  • a general pervasive mood of unhappiness
  • a tendency to develop physical symptoms or fears associated with personal or school problems
  • aggressive and even violent behavior
  • difficulty building or maintain interpersonal relationships
  • discipline problems at home and/or school
  • inappropriate types of behavior or feelings under normal circumstances
  • lack of social-interaction skills
  • low self-esteem
  • mild to severe defiance issues toward parents, teachers, and other authority figures
  • severe academic and/or social frustration
  • trouble bringing emotions under control

There are two schools of thought when it comes to the education of the easily discouraged child. Some educators believe the Least Restrictive Environment (LRE) is in the “mainstream” classroom, while others believe the LRE should be in an environment that gives the correct amount of structure for that individual youngster. No matter where the youngster is placed, the right techniques can help in the right kind of environment. Research has shown that AS and HFA kids do best in an environment that is predictable, stable, and structured. These kids need help in frustration-management and self-control through coaching, modeling, and teaching.



Assessing social skills is very important for understanding emotional problems.  Observations of the AS or HFA youngster’s behavior with friends, classmates, and grown-ups in natural settings (e.g., special education classroom, lunch room, recess, etc.) can provide information about social skills and relationships that is crucial when reporting on a potential emotional disturbance case. Observing behaviors during social skills instruction or role-playing situations provides a more direct method for measuring specific social areas (e.g., social problem solving, social reasoning, etc.).

==> Resource for Teachers: Teaching Students with Asperger's and HFA

The following strategies can be highly effective with children exhibiting frustration and other emotional problems in the classroom:

1. Ask – don’t tell: If the child has a positive relationship with the educator, it may be effective just to “ask” that the unwanted behavior stop due to the problems that it’s creating in the classroom. In this way, no consequence or reward is intended or implied; rather, it’s just a simple, straightforward request from teacher to student.

2. Teach problem solving skills: Help the AS or HFA child to solve his own problems, and reinforce responsibility. By doing this, you imply that the child is not a helpless victim, that he is powerful and can take control of many aspects of his lives. Ask leading question, such as: What is the problem? What have you done so far? What else can you do? What is your next step?

3. Change of environment: Remove the AS or HFA child from a stressful situation before inappropriate behaviors occur; however, be careful not to inadvertently reward the other child (or children) who may be instigating the problem.

4. Impromptu change of activities: If an activity is not successful, change it as quickly as possible. Try to always have a backup plan (e.g., moving from an interactive game to something like Bingo that requires no interaction). This can be done smoothly when a group is becoming over-stimulated. At other times, offering a choice may be more effective (e.g., the children can choose to cover information orally through discussion, or copy notes from an overhead projector).




5. Bonding: Connect with the “special needs” student at a very personal level by discovering as much as possible about him. Find out more than just his challenges – discover his strengths and interests, too.

6. Intentional ignoring: Behaviors that are exhibited for the purpose of attention-seeking and don’t spread or interfere with safety or group functioning may be effectively terminated through intentional ignoring; however, this strategy should never be used with aggressive behaviors. The classmates of the AS or HFA student may need to be taught to do this as well, because peer-attention can be even more powerful than adult-attention for some kids.

7. Forget about “attitude”: Do not criticize the “easily discouraged” child for having a bad attitude. Of course he has a bad attitude! His attitude reflects his experience. For a child that has experienced a lot of frustration and discouragement in the classroom, to have a “positive attitude” about school would be unreasonable. Nonetheless, the “special needs” child is often scolded for his poor attitude. Change his experience from frustration to success, and his attitude will follow – and so will his behavior.

8. Kick start: When it appears that the child is beginning to feel frustrated, assist him with the difficult section(s) of a task or assignment.

==> Resource for Parents: Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management

9. Do a success review: When the child does experience success, talk about what effort made that success happen, specifically, and insist on pride in that effort and the increasing level of skills that follow.

10. Nonverbal signals: If the child is calm enough to respond, has a positive relationship with the educator, and is free from uncontrollable impulses, a nonverbal cue (e.g., softly snapping the fingers) might be all that is needed to assist the child in regaining focus.

11. Learning from mistakes: Teach the child to learn from – rather than feeling defeated by – mistakes. Reaffirm that “learning from making mistakes” is often the best form of learning.

12. Rearranging: Change the seating arrangement or the small-group assignments of children to avoid specific behavioral problems; however, try to do this in a non-punitive and undetectable way.


13. Restriction of tools and space: Rather than taking away certain items that distract after the child is already engaged with them, keep them out of sight from the start. This is crucial when meltdowns escalate to unnecessarily dangerous or reinforcing proportions due to a lot of extra items being available for breaking and/or throwing.

14. Use of distraction: Change the activity or tempo, comment on the child’s work, or ask about a known interest related to the assignment if the child shows signs of frustration or restlessness. Be sure to do this BEFORE off-task behavior occurs.

15. Use of humor: Humor can often stop unwanted behavior if it’s used in a timely and constructive manner. (Note: sarcasm, even of a friendly nature, is not an appropriate use of humor for AS and HFA students).

16. Use of proximity and touch: Move closer to the child experiencing frustration, or place your hand on his shoulder. In this way, you are showing support in a nonthreatening way; however, when using this strategy, avoid using it as an opportunity to point out inappropriate behavior. Also, comment positively on any move toward compliance.

17. Use of routine and structure: Schedules and routines are often overlooked by teachers when considering behavior-management interventions. Knowing what to do – and when to do it – provides a sense of safety, structure, and predictability for children who may not experience such structure in other areas of their lives.

In a nutshell, here’s how can you break the cycle of frustration and resultant discouragement. The “special needs” child must: 
  • Never feel anonymous
  • Learn the satisfaction of hard work done well
  • Learn the pleasure of mental involvement
  • Have clear evidence of accomplishment attributable to skill and effort rather than luck or easy work
  • Feel valued and cared about
  • Experience a classroom that is free of negative competition and peer-pressure
  • Be with grown-ups who like him – and demonstrate it
  • Be taught to take himself seriously as a learner

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2024 Statistics of Autism in Chinese Children

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) has emerged as a significant public health concern worldwide, and China is no exception. As of 2024, new rese...