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Dealing with Autistic Kids Who Hate Change

"Any advice for a child (high functioning) who absolutely hates change and will meltdown at the drop of a hat?! Help!!!"

Research suggests that the brains of kids on the autism spectrum are quite inflexible at switching from rest to task, and this inflexibility is correlated with behaviors characteristic of spectrum disorders. This behavioral inflexibility can manifest as restricted interests (e.g., preoccupation with particular activities, objects or sounds). These behaviors impact how a youngster attends to the external world.

Compared to “typical” kids, young people on the autism spectrum show reduced differentiation between brain connectivity during rest and task (called “brain inflexibility”). Also, there is a correlation between the degree of brain inflexibility shown in the fMRI scans and the severity of restrictive and repetitive behaviors in this population.

Symptoms of inflexibility or behavioral rigidity are often difficult to quantify, and yet often introduce some of the most disruptive chronic behaviors (e.g., tantrums, meltdowns) exhibited by children with ASD level 1, or High-Functioning Autism (HFA). These can be manifest by (a) changes to plans that have been previously laid out, (b) difficulties tolerating changes in routine, or (c) minor differences in the environment (e.g., changes in location for certain activities). For some HFA kids, this inflexibility can lead to aggression, or to extremes of frustration and anxiety that impede certain activities.

Parents – and even teachers – may find themselves “walking on eggshells” in an effort to circumvent any extreme reaction from the HFA child. Also, the children themselves may articulate their anxiety over fears that things will not go according to plan, or that they will be forced to make changes that they can’t handle. Sometimes these behaviors are identified as “obsessive-compulsive” because of the child's need for ritualized order or nonfunctional routine. The idea that OCD and these “needs for sameness” could share some biologic features is a popular notion among professionals.


Have your child watch this video -- Moving From One Activity To Another:




Some of the causes of inflexibility or behavioral rigidity in HFA include the following:
  • Behavioral problems: Some HFA children are just naturally more “set in their ways” and prone to tantrums. Also, some have a very low tolerance for frustration.
  • Neurological catalysts: Underlying neurological issues may explain inflexibility.
  • Parenting issues: Inflexibility can also be influenced by well-meaning parents (e.g., parents may be too busy with other things to take time to teach their child how to deal with frustration or agitation). Some parents find it easier to just let some things go, thus allowing their child to have his/her way time and time again (i.e., over-indulgent parenting). Also, some parents simply do not know how to redirect inappropriate behavior or to systematically teach flexibility. 
  • Security-seeking: Children on the autism spectrum often thrive on routine – sometimes to the extreme. Routines help these children feel secure, and they often have meltdowns if they encounter unwanted changes in their routine (e.g., changes in schedules, activities, food, clothing, music, pillows, the arrangement of knick-knacks, etc.). Over-reactions may look like tantrums, or they can mimic panic attacks. 
  • Sensory sensitivities: Finely tuned taste/smell/sound/touch may cause the child to develop an extraordinary attachment to certain things (e.g., food, a particular song, a favorite pair of shoes, etc.). Sensory sensitivities paired with obsessive interest often cause problems when things change unexpectedly.

Some of the signs of inflexibility or behavioral rigidity include the following:
  • repeats same movement constantly (e.g., clapping hands, facial tics, etc.), which is a self-soothing technique
  • is highly obsessed with narrow topics of interest (e.g., numbers, symbols, phone numbers, sports related statistics, train schedules, etc.)
  • has great difficulty in adapting to changes in school (e.g., shifting from the classroom to the playground)
  • experiences meltdowns or tantrums when unwanted changes are introduced at home (e.g., an earlier bedtime)
  • reacts strongly when thinking or seeing that something has changed from its usual pattern or setting (e.g., his or her display of toy dinosaurs on the dresser)
  • has a very strong attachment to certain items (e.g., toys, keys, switches, hair bands, etc.)
  • likes watching objects that are moving (e.g., ceiling fan, wheels of a toy car, etc.) 
  • lines up items in a certain pattern or order (e.g., all the blue crayons must be grouped together)
  • difficulty multitasking due to adhering rigidly to tasks in the order they are given

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So what can parents do to help their HFA child learn flexibility? 

Below are some simple ideas that will get you started on this journey (hopefully, you will be able to generalize from these ideas, and then create your own based on your child’s unique needs):

1. Alter routines slightly. This helps your HFA child to learn to accept variation in his or her schedule (e.g., you can have your youngster work on his homework BEFORE dinner one day, then AFTER dinner the next day).

2. Give your youngster the “freedom of expression” (e.g., give her the ability to wear the clothes and items of her liking). Allow your child to express herself in the unique being that she is.

3. Illustrate that categories can change. Young people on the spectrum often put something in only one group, and are not be aware that it can also belong with another group (e.g., a yellow plastic bowl can be used for eating cereal in the kitchen, but it can also be put on the dining room table and used to hold candy, or it can be used as a container filled with soil to grow a small plant).

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
 
4. Incorporate role playing and storytelling in everyday activities (e.g., while you are eating animal crackers, have your child pick a particular animal cracker, name that animal, eat the cracker, and then imitate that animal).

5. Maintain a variety of activities in a variety of environments (e.g., go to different public parks, at different times, on different days).

6. Offer a variety of creative avenues. For example, theatre activities (whether in-school or out-of-school) can be encouraged. Many local organizations for the arts can help parents find a place for their youngster in their programs. Even if the child is shy and does not feel comfortable acting in a play, the organization can always provide other services for the stage play (e.g., lighting, decorating, sound, costume, narrating, etc.).

7. Offer your child the ability to help provide the rules and regulations of the household, but also teach that there will be occasions when a particular “rule” can be disregarded temporarily (e.g., “no eating in the family room” may be an ongoing house rule – except when the family gets together to watch a movie and eat popcorn).

8. Prepare an indoor play area in a way that encourages diversity (e.g., play dough, small inexpensive musical instruments, books, blocks, crayons and paper, etc.).

9. Provide multiple opportunities for an assortment of activities outside as well (e.g., sand box, teeter totter, swing set, a fort, tree house, trampoline, etc.). The more “total-body movement” experiences your youngster can have – the better!

10. Teach your child how to review alternative ways of problem-solving by evaluating the problem, thinking of a variety of solutions, and then figuring out which is the best way to execute the solution (e.g., if your child’s friend refuses to share a particular toy, then give 3 or 4 alternative methods to solve this problem and have your youngster execute the one that appears to be the best choice).

While teaching kids the alphabet or how to count may be fairly straightforward, teaching them how to be more flexible in matters is often not as clear-cut. Fostering flexibility in HFA kids often involves a lot of creativity – and even some unconventional tactics – on the parent’s part.

More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

 ==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

 ==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

 ==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

 ==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism 


BEST COMMENT: This is my daughter but her meltdowns are associated with getting new things and discarding old things. The smaller issues are with hoarding. She keeps kleenex boxes, Pringles can and cake icing containers. She puts them in totes with lids and organizes them in her bedroom. The large stuff she melts down over would be buying a new car, getting new furniture, rearranging or painting a room. Those types of changes will be hours long meltdowns. I would love to know how to teach her that life changes every day with and without her knowledge.
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Identifying "Meltdown Triggers" Before It's Too Late: Tips for Parents with Kids on the Spectrum

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Parenting Difficult Teenagers on the Autism Spectrum


If you are a mother or father of a teenager with Asperger’s (AS) or High-Functioning Autism (HFA), you undoubtedly have bigger challenges to overcome than you ever thought possible. There may be days where you feel all alone in your trials and tribulations. Maybe you've been so busy taking care of your teen's needs that you have not had the opportunity to seek support from those who have traveled a similar road.

As a parent of a teen on the autism spectrum, you are most likely aware that he somehow always finds a way to get under your skin.  There are so many changes going on with your teen – emotionally, psychologically, and biologically – that it’s almost impossible to understand him at times. Furthermore, his meltdowns, unpredictable temper, and natural instinct of reclusiveness may make communication nearly impossible.  If this is a challenge that you are facing, the tips listed below will help you positively parent your “special needs” adolescent. Good luck on your journey!

Tips for Parenting Difficult Teens with Asperger’s and High-Functioning Autism:

1. Accept that your AS or HFA adolescent will spend more time alone and away from family members compared to a “typical” teen.

2. Allow your adolescent to express her frustration. It’s hard enough just getting through adolescence – but for AS and HFA teens, the job is even more difficult.

3. Ask for advice from other parents of teens on the autism spectrum.

4. Assign tasks that your teen is capable of doing on his own. In this way, he will feel like he is a contributing member of the family, which is a great morale booster.

5. Be consistent with discipline. If you are not consistent with consequences, your AS or HFA adolescent will become confused about what is - and is not - acceptable. Also, when you're angry, it can be easy to make rash judgments and get carried away with loud demands or threats. Instead, wait until you are calm to set a consequence (e.g., count to 10 before responding to rude or annoying teen-behavior).

==> Discipline for Defiant Asperger's and HFA Teens

6. Don't go overboard with consequences or try to ground for weeks. If you do, your discipline will lose its effectiveness and your adolescent will look for ways to get around it.

7. Focus on the behavior, not your child’s personality. For example, say things like "It's not acceptable to lie about where you've been" instead of "You're a liar." Also, disregard the attitude and focus on the actions.

8. Be exceedingly patient. Parenting an AS or HFA teen takes extra patience with a strong dose of inner strength.  Problematic situations require a deep breath and that extra ounce of strength you really didn’t think you had. Sometimes you can find your patience and strength in a quick memory, a supporting hand, friendly advice, or even just sharing the difficult moments. 

9. Be realistic about “completion time” of chores and homework. Many AS and HFA teens need to do things “step-wise.” In other words, they have to finish what they’re currently doing before they can comfortably move on to the next task. Also, praise efforts – not just results.

10. Be your teen’s parent – not her “buddy.” Your responsibility is to ensure the well-being and safety of your “special needs” teenager. Intervening in a dangerous situation (e.g., involving drugs, abuse or truancy) might make your teenager dislike you, but it will also save her life. Don't just “go along just to get along.”

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11. Pick your battles carefully. Your adolescent will feel more resistant to what you have to say if you lecture him about every perceived transgression. Decide what's really important, and focus your efforts on those behaviors. Just address one issue at a time!

12. Encourage friendships. Loneliness is one of the main causes for challenging behavior among AS and HFA teenagers. Try to encourage opportunities for socializing and making friends.

13. Establish clear rules and guidelines for your adolescent to help her understand what behavior is acceptable. Don't just wait until she does something you don't like and then discipline her. Make sure the rules are clear from the start. Also, involve your adolescent in establishing the house rules so that if she breaks the rules, you can remind her that she played a role in setting them. Furthermore, be very specific and keep the rules simple (e.g., "In this house, we speak kindly to one another" or "Everyone must pitch in by completing their assigned house chores").

14. Look at your teen’s history. Negative events that happened during the pre-school and elementary school years help to shape a teen’s personality. By the time these kids become adolescents, many have been living with the resulting pain for most of their lives (e.g., due to peer-rejection, teasing, bullying, etc.). AS and HFA teens may feel pain and anger, but they lack the ability to act on those emotions. However, they are able to act on those emotions with more lasting and harmful consequences.

15. Expect gradual improvement, not immediate results. Your AS or HFA teen is emotionally immature compared to her same-age peers.

16. Foster independence. It’s so easy to do everything for your “special needs” teen (e.g., making all the decisions for her).  Give her the chance to do more herself and to make decisions on her own.

17. Get a dog. According to research, owning a dog can transform an AS or HFA teen’s life. Bringing a pet into your home is great for all teenagers, but can become a real friend for those with developmental disabilities. Having a pet reduces stress, can help your teen learn responsibility, improve social skills, and reduce feelings of isolation. Research has shown that dogs can calm and comfort “special needs” teenagers and help them develop the confidence to try new tasks.

18. Get a punching bag and some boxing gloves. My grandson’s behavior became very problematic when he started middle school. I found that a punching bag helped him to unwind. He used to scream at it while punching it! It was also great exercise to get rid of some of the stress and anger that accrued through his school day. Using the punching bag was his “home from school” routine each day through the week.

19. Record your moments of success and failure in a journal. Keeping a journal and recording incidents can help you to look back and see if there are any patterns or contributing factors to problematic behavior. The journal may be a good thing to look through with your teen, talking about both the positives and negatives. Also, be sure to log and monitor medications (don’t forget, medications can have side-effects that contribute to problematic behavior).

20. Try to look at your adolescent’s situation from a different perspective. In this shift of perspective, answers are often revealed and insight into what is triggering your adolescents' behavior comes into focus. Sometimes moms and dads can get un-stuck simply by looking at a situation with new eyes, which is usually followed by acting or thinking about things differently. When the parent responds in different ways, there is no choice for the adolescent but to act differently too.

==> Discipline for Defiant Asperger's and HFA Teens

21. Provide lots of structure. Write down routines as sequences of tasks (2-5 items only), and post where easily visible. AS and HFA teenagers respond well to structure and routines because it helps to nurture self-discipline and provides a sense of security.  These “special needs” teens are typically afraid of the “unknown” – and as a mother or father, it is your job to guide your teenager through his many “unknowns.”  Growth and change are unavoidable, and these teens need the security of routines to counteract their constantly changing worlds. Structure and routines help them grow to understand and learn to positively control change and their surroundings. The security of small routines actually enables them to handle change and growth with less fear and more independence.

22. When confronting misbehavior, relax your facial muscles and keep your voice down. When faced with an angry teen who is aggressive and shouting, keep your face neutral and lower the volume and pitch of your own voice. Nine times out of ten, your teen will quieten down to hear what you are saying. Also, stay calm – but be assertive. Take some deep breaths if you feel yourself beginning to get aggravated. Calm, assertive instructions and body language are important assets when dealing with challenging behavior.  Any more emotion into an already emotional situation only clouds judgments, causes greater confusion, and launches your teen closer to meltdown.

23. Try to be prepared. If you know you are going to do something with your teenager or ask him to do something that may trigger a tantrum or meltdown, anticipate and prepare for his response. Preparation often relieves some of the stress that rings your “patience buzzer.” Also, always visualize your response before acting on it.

24. Understand when professional help is needed. Most AS and HFA adolescents benefit from some type of professional help in identifying the underlying reasons for their problems and assistance in dealing with them. Getting help for your “special needs” adolescent when she first starts having difficulties is usually far more successful than waiting until problems get worse. For some moms and dads, this can be a difficult step to take. Many parents fear that “reaching out for help” is a sign of weakness – but nothing could be further from the truth. The advantages of seeking professional help for your adolescent include: (a) experienced help in figuring out the reasons your adolescent is acting out, (b) expertise in identifying what clinical interventions are most likely to be effective, and (c) support in helping your adolescent, yourself and your family get through challenging times.

25. AS and HFA adolescents may not know how to express themselves well, causing them to act out – and parents may take the behavior to heart, causing them to lose patience and to speak in anger. Thus, talk with your adolescent about how to express himself in a more appropriate way, helping him to better handle his anger and frustration. Role-play specific situations. Play your adolescent first so you can model appropriate responses, and then let your adolescent give it a try.


Why Your Teen with Asperger's or High-Functioning Autism Prefers To Be Alone 




Additional ideas for parenting your “special needs” adolescent include the following:
  • Compliment your AS or HFA adolescent and celebrate his efforts and accomplishments.
  • Encourage your adolescent to develop solutions to problems or conflicts. Help her learn to make good decisions. Create opportunities for her to use her own judgment, and be available for advice and support.
  • Encourage your adolescent to get enough sleep and exercise, and to eat healthy, balanced meals.
  • Encourage your adolescent to volunteer and become involved in civic activities in her community.
  • If your adolescent engages in interactive internet media (e.g., games, chat rooms, and instant messaging), encourage him to make good decisions about what he posts and the amount of time he spends on these activities.
  • Respect your adolescent’s need for privacy.
  • Respect your adolescent’s opinion. Listen to her without playing down her concerns.
  • Show affection for your adolescent. Spend time together doing things you enjoy.
  • Show interest in your adolescent’s school and extracurricular interests and activities and encourage him to become involved in various activities (e.g., sports, music, theater, and art).
  • Talk with your adolescent about her concerns, and pay attention to any changes in her behavior. Ask her if she has had suicidal thoughts, particularly if she seems sad or depressed. Asking about suicidal thoughts will not cause her to have these thoughts, but it will let her know that you care about how she feels. Seek professional help if necessary.
  • Talk with your adolescent and help him plan ahead for difficult or uncomfortable situations. Discuss what he can do if he is in a group and someone is using drugs or under pressure to have sex, or is offered a ride by someone who has been drinking.

Asperger’s and High-Functioning Autism are “developmental disabilities,” which are some of the most overwhelming for parents to deal with, changing visions of the future and providing immediate difficulties in caring for and educating their teen. AS and HFA teens with behavioral issues don't respond well to traditional discipline. Instead, they require specialized techniques that are tailored to their specific abilities and challenges. If those techniques are not developed and used, these young people often throw their families into chaos – and are seriously at risk for school-related problems. Thus, parents will do well to take most of the ideas listed above to heart. Use them wisely and frequently.

Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
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The Use of “Structure” to Reduce Problematic Behavior in Kids with ASD [level 1]

"Any methods for preventing problem behaviors in an out of control child with an autism spectrum disorder? Please help with advice!"

For many children with Asperger’s (AS) and High-Functioning Autism (HFA), problematic behaviors are common. The term “problematic behavior” is a controversial one, but it’s intended to suggest that certain behaviors present a “problem” for parents, siblings, peers, teachers, therapists, etc. This helps to prevent internalizing the cause of the behaviors and blaming the “special needs” child.

This is a very important concept in AS and HFA, because it’s unlikely that any behavior which causes difficulties for parents and others is intended vindictively or maliciously. There is usually some other, unidentified, cause that provokes problematic behavior. Young people on the autism spectrum derive no enjoyment by being a problem to others.



Most problematic behaviors occur in the presence of parents and siblings (probably because AS and HFA children feel more comfortable simply being themselves when around familiar people). If such behavior is a problem for therapists and other professionals (which it is), then it can certainly be a challenge for moms, dads and siblings. Thus, it’s crucial that problematic behaviors are dealt with in way that (a) helps the entire family to cope more effectively, and (b) allows the “special needs” child to develop social skills and emotion management. 

Low-frustration tolerance is one of the most common problems in young people on the autism spectrum. They often appear to go into a state of anger, rage, anxiety, or fear for no reason. All children get frustrated and then act-out from time to time, but this problem is more of a challenge for moms and dads of autistic children. These children may seem inconsolable during the episode of frustration, the episode often lasts a long time, and the resolution that typically accompanies the end of feeling frustrated rarely occurs.

Low-frustration tolerance is just one example of problematic behavior. Similar episodes of panic, anxiety, anger, and aggression may be seen all through childhood, the teenage years, and even into adulthood (e.g., yelling, crying, resisting contact with others, pushing others away, refusing to respond to interaction, using others as objects, refusing to comply with daily tasks, etc.). These behaviors are “problematic” in the sense that they cause disruption (e.g., to a classroom engaged in a lesson, a family outing or event, etc.).

Children and teens with AS and HFA often rely on rituals, routines and structure, which helps define the world in terms of consistent rules and explanations. Consistency helps these young people to function more comfortably in a world that would otherwise be perceived as confusing, chaotic and hostile. Most kids on the autism spectrum find their own strategies for imposing structure and maintaining consistency. Without this structure, they would be totally overwhelmed and unable to function …they would be unable to understand the behavior of others …and the information they receive through their senses would be nearly impossible to bring together into a purposeful whole.

==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Asperger's and HFA Children

When structure and consistency are disrupted in the AS or HFA child’s life, the world becomes confusing and overwhelming again – thus launching him or her into “problematic” behaviors as a response. This disruption of structure can be obvious (e.g., getting up at an unusual hour, having a collection of objects disturbed, not being able to engage in a favorite activity, being made to go a different way to school, etc.) …or it may be hidden (e.g., sensory sensitivities, subtle changes in the environment which the youngster is used to, etc.). Many of these “triggers” may be out of the control of the child. Thus, it’s important to remember that low-frustration tolerance and similar behaviors are not cases of “misbehavior” necessarily, rather they may simply be natural reactions to various unwanted stimuli.

"Structure-Dependent" Thinking in Kids with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism 

 

How parents can begin to reduce problematic behaviors in their AS or HFA child:

1. At the time of the inappropriate behavior, be sure to limit your talking to “stating the rule and consequence.” Lengthy debates, explanations and arguments should be avoided at this time. Also, ignore complaints from your youngster. Further discussion about the rule and consequence can be done at a later time when things have calmed down.

2. Avoid anger and over-reaction to your child’s problematic behavior. Don’t let your emotions take control. Refrain from demanding or shouting. Stay calm! You’re “over-reacting” will through “gas on the fire.”

3. Establish family rules and put them in writing. Rules should be (a) specific, (b) easy to understand, (c) achievable, (d) age-appropriate, and (e) consistent. Rules should be discussed and decided upon ahead of time in mutual collaboration between the mom and dad without the youngster present. Then, after the rules have been agreed upon, they should be explained to the youngster in simple, concrete terms.

4. Help your youngster use problem-solving skills in order to make a plan for changing behavior in the future. For example, if the behavior involves difficulties getting along with peers, help your youngster learn appropriate communication and conflict resolutions skills.

5. Listen to your youngster’s point of view about a particular rule. When appropriate, consider making changes to the rule based on your youngster’s reasoning. This doesn’t mean you are “giving in” to your youngster’s demands, rather it means that (at times) you will negotiate with your youngster on a rule and reach a compromise.

==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Asperger's and HFA Children

6. Make your expectations very clear. For example, let your child know that (a) she WILL be required to perform certain tasks (e.g., completing homework, cleaning her bedroom, getting ready for school on time, etc.), and (b) there WILL be consequences for not completing such tasks.

7. Set up routines for daily living that are consistent and predictable (e.g., morning, mealtime, and bedtime routines). Your youngster will learn many things from these routines (e.g., how to take care of herself, how to interact with others, discovering that life runs more smoothly if things are organized and predictable, etc.).

8. Simply ignore some behaviors (e.g., whining and complaining).

9. Structuring your youngster’s environment. Determine what activities he will engage in and how he will fill his time. Also, be available physically and mentally to provide appropriate monitoring and supervision.

10. Try to anticipate problem situations (e.g., don’t let your youngster get into a situation where he becomes overly tired, hungry, or bored).

11. Use distraction techniques. If your youngster is acting-out, distraction with something of interest can focus her on more positive behaviors.

12. Use rewards to increase appropriate behavior. When it comes to children on the autism spectrum, it’s usually better to reward desirable behaviors than to discipline undesirable ones. Also, it’s best to provide the reward immediately after the desired behavior has occurred.

AS and HFA Kids Want Structure 

 

Note: While providing structure and consistency are important skills for you to use with your AS or HFA child, it’s also important to be aware of the importance of allowing her some independence and autonomy. As often as is appropriate, allow your child to have opportunities to make her own choices and decisions, respect her choices and decisions, and allow natural “real-world” consequences to occur (when safety is not an issue, of course).

By

Behavioral and Cognitive Rigidity in Kids with High-Functioning Autism

Behavioral rigidity refers to a child’s difficulty maintaining appropriate behavior in new and unfamiliar situations. The opposite of rigidity would be flexibility, which enables children to shift effortlessly from task to task in the classroom, from topic to topic in conversation, from one role to another in games, etc.

Rigidity can also affect thinking. Cognitive rigidity occurs when the child is unable to consider alternatives to the current situation, alternative viewpoints, or innovative solutions to a problem. The child with rigid thinking tends to view things in “either-or” terms (e.g., things are either right or wrong, good or bad). He or she wants concrete, black and white answers. The “gray areas” of life are very uncomfortable (e.g., often has an exact way of doing things with no variations).

Children with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) often demonstrate extreme forms of rigidity or inflexibility. This may manifest itself as difficulty with (a) ending an intense emotional feeling, (b) making transitions during the school day (e.g., from lunch back to the classroom), and (c) tolerating changes in schedules or everyday routines.

Rigidity and Defiance in Kids with High-Functioning Autism 



 Here is a 3-step process for helping your HFA child with his/her rigidity issues:

Step 1—

Realizing that your HFA youngster will not be a good observer of her behavior is your first step. She will not know what to do in certain situations, because she doesn't understand how the world works. Not knowing what to do usually results in anxiety that leads to additional ineffective and inappropriate actions. HFA behavior is usually a result of this anxiety, which leads to difficulty moving on and letting go of an issue, and "getting stuck" on something. This is “rigidity,” and it is the most common reason for behavioral problems.

Reasons for rigidity may include the following:
  • A misunderstanding or misinterpretation of another's action
  • A violation of a rule or ritual (i.e., changing something from the way it is “supposed” to be)
  • Anxiety about a current or upcoming event
  • Attention difficulties
  • Difficulty transitioning from one activity to another
  • Immediate gratification of a need
  • Lack of knowledge about how something is done  
  • Sensory sensitivities
  • The need to avoid or escape from a non-preferred activity (e.g., doing Math homework)
  • The need to control a situation
  • The need to engage in - or continue - a preferred activity (e.g., an obsessive action or fantasy)

Often times, parents of children with HFA do not fully understand what their youngster is thinking, how he interprets the world, and how his deficits cause problems. After their child receives an official diagnosis, parents often rush into action before collecting enough information about the disorder. If they don’t learn about the ins-and-outs of the disorder, parents may very likely do the wrong thing. So, the second step in effectively dealing with rigidity is to understand some of the associated theories on HFA. Below are the prominent theories that will shed light on this topic:

Cortisol Deficit: According to researchers, cortisol (the body’s stress hormone) may be a key factor in understanding HFA. Cortisol is one of several stress hormones that acts similar to a “red alert” that is triggered by stressful circumstances, which helps the individual to react quickly to changes. In “typical” children, there is a two-fold increase in levels of cortisol within 30 minutes of waking up, with levels gradually declining during the day as part of the internal body clock. One study found that children with HFA didn’t have this peak, although levels of cortisol still decreased during the day as normal. This difference in stress hormone levels may be highly significant in explaining why kids on the autism spectrum are less able to react and cope with unexpected change. The study suggests that these young people may not adjust normally to the challenge of a new environment on waking, which may affect the way they subsequently engage with the world around them. By viewing the symptoms of HFA as a “stress response” rather than a “behavior problem” can help parents and teachers develop techniques for avoiding circumstances that may cause anxiety in kids with the disorder.

Executive Dysfunction: Executive function theory deals with impulse control, inhibition, mental flexibility, planning, the initiation and monitoring of action, and working memory. This theory explains some of the symptoms of HFA. For instance, poor social interaction may be due to a defect in cognitive shifting, which is a vital part of executive function. Also, repetitive and restricted behavior observed in young people on the autism spectrum may be explained due to executive dysfunction.

Brain Dysregulation: Another theory suggests that the brains of children on the autism spectrum are structurally normal, but “dysregulated.” In other words, there is an impaired regulation of a bundle of neurons in the brain stem that processes sensory signals from all areas of the body.

Weak Central Coherence: Weak central coherence theory describes the inability to understand the context of a situation or to see the “big picture.” This might explain common behaviors found in HFA children (e.g., repetitiveness, focusing on parts of objects, persistence in behaviors related to details, etc.).

Theory of Mind Deficit: Theory of mind is the intuitive understanding of your mental state, and the mental state of other people (e.g., emotions, thoughts, beliefs, perceptions, knowledge, intentions and desires) – and of how those mental states influence behavior. Kids with HFA have difficulty understanding others thoughts, which according to this theory, is the core cognitive deficit.
 

Step 3—

The following strategy is your third step for dealing with rigidity, and can be used with a variety of activities (e.g., chores and homework). There are two main parts to this strategy: 1) practicing in small steps, and 2) providing praise based on effort.

Practicing in small steps: The first part of this strategy is the use of subgoals. Setting a subgoal helps the youngster focus. In any activity, watch for him to begin to lose interest, become bored, get frustrated, or become distracted. At that point, set a subgoal that requires him to attend only slightly longer than he initially desires. For a 5-year-old, this may mean a subgoal that can be completed in 30 seconds. For a 10-year-old, a subgoal that lasts 3 minutes may be more appropriate. The goal is to give the youngster brief practice in “being patient with the process” without overloading him by extensive demands.

Providing praise based on effort: Whenever the youngster puts in "a little extra effort" or works beyond the frustration point, the second part of the strategy can be employed. This is “praise based on effort” instead of “praise based on level of performance.” Usually, moms and dads focus on their youngster’s “productivity” rather than focusing on “the amount of energy the youngster had to devote to the activity.” When using praise, acknowledge the amount of “applied effort,” and point out that the youngster’s “attempt at being productive” paid off (e.g., "You worked very hard and trying to solve that Math problem!"). If you build pride in this extra effort, rigidity will likely lessen.

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Here are two specific examples of how to apply this strategy:
  1. If your youngster is helping you fold clothes and begins to lose interest or focus, you can assign a very small number of clothing items to be folded before she takes a break. This minimizes the frustration and the amount of distraction. Once your youngster makes this extra effort, use “praise based on effort” in order to build pride. This strategy can be used even when she is not “successful” (e.g., doesn’t finish folding all the clothes). Any extra “pride in effort” is likely to reduce rigidity and attention difficulties.
  2. If your youngster is working on a lengthy Math assignment and shows signs of frustration or boredom, set a subgoal that requires completion of only a couple more problems before taking a short break. This should help minimize angry outbursts and distraction. Next, use encouragement, rewards, or loss of privileges in order to get your youngster to focus slightly longer. If your child has an angry outburst when the subgoal is set, give him an opportunity to take a “time-out” before working. He can choose to either work on the subgoal, or to go to a designated area until he calms down (e.g., "You can finish your Math assignment now, or take a time-out and finish it in a few minutes”). However, make it clear that once he has calmed down, the only choice is to return to work on the subgoal. This provides your youngster a chance for an outlet for his frustration, but it also sets clear limits so that he must eventually complete the subgoal. This will also help you limit your “lectures about the importance of completing homework.”

The strategy described in Step 3 will have the most impact if it is used daily. Look for opportunities involving homework, chores, or play activities. Look for every chance to build pride and “effort.” Pay less attention to “productivity” or “successful completion” of activities/tasks.


==> Need tips on how to handle your child's fixations and obsessions? You'll find more than you'll need right here...


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