My ASD Child

Even if moms and dads have recognized that their youngster has problems, a definite diagnosis of Aspergers brings intense emotion, sorrow and many questions. Aspergers is on the high functioning end of the autistic spectrum, but still presents many problems in daily life. Dealing with a Sense of Loss when Aspergers is Diagnosed— All moms and dads have hopes and dreams for their kids and these begin to form before birth. When a diagnosis of Aspergers is presented, some or all of these aspirations are crushed. After grieving for the loss of dreams, it is important to replace them with new ones. These should be along the lines of helping the youngster fulfill his or her potential. There are many resources available for kids with Aspergers, and it is important to look into these and see what suits the youngster best. In spite of their difficulties, many Aspergers kids are very bright and excel in certain academic areas. Balancing Family Life and Aspergers— Kids with Asp...

Approximately 50% of kids with Aspergers have delayed speech. While many kids grow out of this by age five, others go on to experience other language problems. These generally fall into one or more of the following three areas of linguistics: 1. Pragmatics and Aspergers— Pragmatics refers to language usage and the way that context relates to meaning. Kids with Aspergers often have difficulty in holding a normal conversation where there is give and take and social interaction. While most people learn these skills by observing others, those with Aspergers may need personal coaching. Problems with pragmatics manifest in the following forms: • does not allow the other person to talk • does not use people’s names • focuses exclusively on topics that interest them • gives too much detailed information • interrupting others • lack of facial expression and eye contact • lack of greeting • oblivious to boredom in others • oblivious to emotional reactions in othe...

There's always an explanation. A 23-year-old Aspergers college grad wants to hold out for the right job rather than jump into an underpaid makeshift position. Rents are so inflated. A 24-year-old Aspergers daughter moving out of her boyfriend's apartment couldn't possibly afford a place of her own. With two bedrooms to spare, parents can re-house her -- right? Whatever the reason, young adults (even some without Aspergers) are returning home in increasing numbers—following graduation, the dissolution of a relationship or the loss of a job. They often live rent-free and subsidized, with no scheduled date for departure. But while much attention has been paid to live-at-home "adultescents," little has been said about their parents, many of whom are Baby Boomers who greet their boomerang children with open arms. For a variety of emotional and demographic reasons—their desire to be close with their children, a yearning for youth—many of today's parents (the o...

The two most important issues to address with ASD (high functioning autistic) teens are sexual safety and social issues related to sexuality. It comes down to education directed to personal and sexual safety - starting with closing and locking the bathroom door, knowing who can and can't help with menstrual care, and understanding the difference between good touching and bad touching. Very few programs exist to teach young people with ASD about sex and sexuality, and because ASD teens are often unaware of social cues and peer expectations, clear, direct education is often critical. For example, they need to know they should lock the bathroom stall, and they need to learn how to do it. Sometimes moms and dads think it's safer if they take their youngster into the bathroom with them, but the challenge with that is that the person most likely to cause abuse is someone the kid knows, not someone he/she doesn't know. And if you don't teach your son/daughter to close...

It used to be thought that individuals with Aspergers did not marry because of their social difficulties. This is not true! There may be many undiagnosed people with Aspergers who have spouses and kids. Some may manage marriage and family life very well, others may have great difficulties. Living with an individual with Aspergers can be very difficult because of the very subtle nature of the disability. There is no physical sign of the disorder, and it can be hard to explain to friends and family that the peculiar behavior is not deliberate. What Spouses Say— The following are direct quotes taken from case histories written by spouses of individuals with Aspergers: • "Anything he cannot face he throws away, and the consequences are -horrific... He keeps copious lists of 'things to do, but I have to tell him what they are. If I am not there, he loses the lists... His social behavior is appalling; falls asleep in company, makes rude noises." • "All ...