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How to Deal with Obsessions and Rituals

This is my dilemma - KW saw spit coming out of my mouth when I was speaking forcefully about his homework, and from that time has developed a sort of theory that whenever I talk I spit. From there, he started spitting in order to get rid of the germs that he thought went into his mouth. (I really apologize if this is a bit too gross). So now he softly allows saliva to fall onto his clothes or book or whatever.
 
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Children on the Autism Spectrum and Video Game Obsessions

Question

How can I get my autistic child (high functioning) to do things besides computer and video games? He just does not want to go out and do things!

Answer

Many moms and dads speak of the same problem: their youngster spends far too much time on the computer or playing games. Video and computer games are addicting for anyone, but kids with ASD (high-functioning autism) are especially fond of the repetition that can be comforting. 
 
The games are both predictable and entertaining. While it's important your child enjoys his time on the computer and video, it's also important he get out into the world and remains active.

My advice is to play on his passions, in this case gaming. Find other kids in the area and start a gaming “club” of sorts, where you can rotate homes and have what seemingly is a playgroup with video games. Set limits for the computer that allow him ample playing time, but also allow him to socialize, or spend time outdoors. Video game obsession is common among all kids, and while it can be hard to control, it's not entirely impossible. 
 
Depending on the age your child is, a part time job reviewing or testing games could be something to look into. Your local community college may even offer smaller, intimate classes for a future gamer, and while getting your child to agree that it sounds like something he may like to try may be a challenge, it also may give you peace of mind that all that gaming is for a good cause.

If you are keen on socialization and activities that don't involve gaming, try to find an ASD support group in the area. This is a great way for both you and your child to meet folks. You can search your towns website, yahoo groups, or Meetup.com (a website for social groups) to find resources in the area that can benefit you. Getting together at parks or museums is one way to get you and your child out of the house and meeting other folks.

When it comes to video games and summer vacation, you'll need to be firm. Giving in to your child sounds [and is] much easier than insisting he get outside for a bit, or partake in other activities. Set limits, stick with them, and both you and your child will enjoy the summer together. 
 
If you can, try to devise a system that keeps track of your child’s video game time. For every hour that he spends outdoors, or engaged in other activities, he can “earn” 20 minutes on the computer. To some moms and dads, this seems juvenile -- but it works!

Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
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Social Stories to Teach Social Skills to Kids on the Autism Spectrum

Children with high-functioning autism are often perplexed when it comes to picking up social cues. Social stories for children with behavior problems due to ASD help to teach these skills in an easy and direct way that children better understand.

Social stories for children with behavior problems help teach more appropriate social skills. Kids on the spectrum don't just pick up social skills, so social stories can provide a great tool in teaching a skill in a direct way. Social stories help to give children a better understanding of other people's thoughts, feelings and views. They also help the ASD student to better predict another person's behavior based on his/her actions.

Social stories present various situations in a structured and direct way so that the youngster can understand a situation without having to "read between the lines". Social stories are written from the youngster's perspective. They are simply illustrated using uncluttered drawings or photographs to depict each step of the story.

Social stories can be written about many different social and behavioral situations that kids encounter in the school or any other environment. Some possible ideas for social stories include "getting in line", "taking turns on the swings", "sitting in the lunch room", "circle time", "taking turns when playing games", "sharing my trucks", or any other situation that causes confusion for a youngster.

Write social stories in the first person, present tense. The youngster will read or hear the story as if he/she is the one talking. This is easiest for him/her to understand. Simply describe the situation, who is involved, what is happening, where the action is taking place, as well as why the situation has occurred. 
 
Give some perspective about the thoughts and feelings of the other people involved in the story. Plainly state what the desired response of the youngster should be in the story. You may use a sentence to summarize the situation at the end of the story to better enable the youngster to understand the desired actions.

Here is an example of how to write social stories for children with behavior problems. This social story was written for a youngster who doesn't understand that other children don't appreciate it when someone stands too close to them when carrying on a conversation:

"Sometimes I talk to the other kids in my class. The other kids don't like when I stand very close to them. When I stand too closely, it makes my friends feel crowded. If I stand too close, other kids sometimes get mad at me. I can back up and stand three feet away from my friends when we talk. It makes my friends happy when I stand three feet away when we talk."
 
 
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Does My Child Really Have ASD?

"We have a diagnosis of ASD from our pediatrician, but our counselor is telling me that she does not agree with the diagnosis because my son is very social with her and he always makes eye contact. He has ASD traits and then some that are not." 
 
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    Crucial Strategies for Parents of Challenging Kids on the Autism Spectrum

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