Search This Blog

Tantrum-Free Transitions for Children on the Autism Spectrum

"How can I make transitions easier for my child (high functioning autistic) in order to avoid his transition-related meltdowns?"

Young people with High Functioning Autism (HFA) usually live in the moment and have difficulty moving from one activity to the next. Stopping an activity in mid-drift interrupts their train of thought, which pushes them out of their comfort zone. 
 
As parents, we are often thinking of what we must do next, or even what happened in the recent past. While it may be easy for us to switch to the next activity, and while we know why a particular switch must occur, kids on the autism spectrum do not think this way. We, as parents, need to think like our “special needs” children.



Transitions happen every day in your youngster’s world. Waking up in the morning, going to school, coming to meals, leaving for an activity, saying goodbye to a friend, and getting ready for bed are all examples of transitions that can cause an HFA youngster anxiety – or worse! And then there are those larger transitions: starting a new school or day care, moving to a new house, losing a loved one, etc. – all of which really take a toll on the youngster’s emotions.

Since each transition is different, and since they happen so frequently, it’s helpful to use a variety of strategies. Moms and dads who provide empathy and support, help their HFA youngster gain a sense of control, create rituals that provide predictability, and teach their youngster ways to cope with change will find far greater success. 
 

Listed below are some important techniques that will help make transitions easier for your youngster:

1. Allow your youngster enough time to transition. Whether you are preparing for a short-term transition from play-time to meal-time, or you have just told your child that the family is planning a trip to Disneyland next month, remember that HFA children process change in their own time; they need time to “grow through” the change depending on how drastic that change is going to be. When planning activities, add in extra time for transitions that is proportionate to the degree of change. For example, if you are experiencing a major life change such as birth, death, divorce, or a move, plan to allow your youngster a few months or more to really adjust to this new experience.

2. Create a list of “house rules” and review them with your child periodically. The rules should include what to do during specific transitions (e.g., how to move from playing video games to getting dressed for Karate class). Post the rules where your child can see them. He or she will become accustomed to the rules, and understand what to do and what to expect throughout the day.

3. Develop a set of rituals, for example: (a) a “chit-chat” ritual at bedtime (e.g., ask your youngster about the happy, sad, scary and frustrating parts to his or her day; (b) a goodbye ritual (e.g., develop a secret handshake with your youngster that’s used only when he or she leaves you; (c) an after-school ritual (e.g., let your youngster have a snack and play outside for 30 minutes before starting homework); (d) an end-of-the-week ritual (e.g., have a “family night” every Saturday to reconnect and unwind after a busy week).

4. Give your child a notice when transitions are approaching. A simple, "In 10 minutes, we are sitting at the dinner table," is enough to give him a little warning. This lets your child know he should be finishing up what he is working on and allows him the chance to wash his hands, find his place at the table, and ease into a new state of mind.

5. Give your child something to look forward to before initiating a transition. For example, if you’re leaving the park to return home, talk about the fantastic things your child can do when he or she gets home.

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

6. Look for natural transitions or breaks that may make it easier to leave or move on. It’s better to end peacefully after 37 minutes than trying to end during a meltdown after 2 hours. Also, keep in mind that transitions, like any other step in your day, will be exacerbated by lack of sleep, hunger, or illness.

7. Picture schedules and cards can be helpful for HFA kids who have a hard time following verbal directions. Pointing to the picture of the next activity, or handing your youngster the picture and letting her carry it to the next activity can be helpful in transitioning.

8. Sing “transition songs” prior to or during transitions. You can find these songs in many children’s book stores, and there are songs for almost any transition (e.g., “Wash Our Hands,” “Going Shopping,” “Time for Bed”). Alternatively, you can make up your own songs (e.g., use a familiar tune like “Row Row Row Your Boat,” and then add your own lyrics).

9. Take one of your child’s special items (e.g., a doll) with you to help make the transition easier for her – anything that makes her feel safe so that it’s easier to shift the focus away from anxiety to something she loves to think about.

10. Talk to your youngster about transitions, and be willing to listen and observe. A good way to start a discussion about transitions, in general, is through social stories. Consider creating a story around “how to calmly move from one task to the next.”





11. Transitions offer families an opportunity to grow together through difficulty or challenge by finding new ways to cope and manage life. Allow some time to brainstorm alternatives if, for example, a switch from the car to the church doesn’t go well, or a move to a new school is failing miserably. Be open to alternatives you haven’t thought of before.
 

12. Try to avoid giving sudden orders and directions. Before wanting your child to transition, go into his “safe zone” (i.e., whatever he is doing at the moment) and connect with him mentally, emotionally and physically. Talk to your child about what he is doing or something he truly loves. Then, keep that connection going and take it with you while you both move to the next activity.

13. When attempting a transition, keep the focus on the fun your child had with her activity and ask questions while you move on to the next activity. It helps her shift from being upset about leaving the current activity to keeping the good feeling with her longer (it’s like saying, “Don’t be upset that the activity is over …be happy that it happened”).

14. Young people with HFA handle change differently. Some can sail from one activity to another, while others have a hard time and fight even a little change. Talk with an autism specialist who can assist you and make the journey more pleasant for the whole family.

15. Remember, even though your youngster may put up a fight, you are the one setting the rules and limits. For example, if it’s time to leave the playground, it’s time to leave the playground. And luckily (at least for a little while) you are bigger than your child is and can scoop him up under your arms when all else fails!

Transitions will always be difficult for kids on the autism spectrum. Developmentally, they're simply not well-equipped to leave an activity they're enjoying and move to a potentially less desirable one. But thankfully, there are many ways parents can help their kids through these transitions.



 
Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 

==> Videos for Parents of Children and Teens with ASD
 
----------
 
 
More articles for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the ASD child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

Click here to read the full article…

---------------------------------------------------------------

Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's or HFA child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and your child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.

Click here for the full article...

--------------------------------------------------------------

Although Aspergers [high-functioning autism] is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager on the spectrum are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

Click here to read the full article…

------------------------------------------------------------

Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with ASD face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

Click here to read the full article…

------------------------------------------------------------

Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

Click here to read the full article...

------------------------------------------------------------

Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.

Click here for the full article...
 
------------------------------------------------------------
 
A child with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) can have difficulty in school because, since he fits in so well, many adults may miss the fact that he has a diagnosis. When these children display symptoms of their disorder, they may be seen as defiant or disruptive.

Click here for the full article...
By

2024 Statistics of Autism in Chinese Children

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) has emerged as a significant public health concern worldwide, and China is no exception. As of 2024, new rese...